fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #4894 ]

⌈ Secret Post #4894 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[What We Do in the Shadows]

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03.

[sarazanmai]

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04.

[image is a Dark-Eyed Junco (bird species)]

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05.

[star wars]

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06.

[Hairspray Live!]

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07.

[homestuck 2]

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08.

[ff7]

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09.

[Doctor Dolittle]

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10.

[great british sewing bee]

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11.

["La Lisiada" scene from Maria la del Barrio]

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12.

[Sailor Moon]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 83 secrets from Secret Submission Post #701.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

What movie made you realize that movies can be bad?

Tree of Life
I mean I knew intellectually that movies could be bad but I'd never encountered one I actually hated before and this one was abysmal; I realized afterwards that uh, I should have just walked out on it.

Star Trek V. My dad was super into Star Trek and introduced it to me from an early age. So Star Trek V has to be the first movie I remember recognizing as being bad. My dad thinks it is bad too, but he's a completist, so he had to show it to me anyway.

I've shown 1-4 to my friend, and am kinda debating skipping V... Otoh, she deserves to see the full picture, and the camping scenes are great...

Re: Based on 9

sparklywalls - 2020-05-30 20:43 (UTC) - Expand

The Beastmaster from 1982. What an awful movie.

This may be unpopular but Labyrinth. Bowie was just a creepy guy who stole babies and the puppets were ugly.

Seconded. I want to like Labyrinth so much more than I do. *sob*

Definitely probably controversial but Avengers Endgame. It was so disjointed and weak I just walked out.

I've seen plenty of movies that were bad before but it was the first one I'd expected to be okay and it was just crap.

I walked too. I am so, so easy to entertain; even movies that are renowned as awful I can at least giggle about for the most part and I won't hate the experience, but jfc, Endgame. My expectations were actually fairly low (nothing more than a fun popcorn flick), and it failed to meet even those. Baffling. It was SO BAD.

i didn't walk out as i found the bits i liked enjoyable, but fuck me i wouldn't watch the whole thing again. i was wary of their attempts at time-travel, as it can be messy to pull off and that risk is tripled in superhero stories, and my caution was warranted because holy shit did they do a terrible job of it.

i like the MCU for the most part but i truly boggle at fans who act like endgame was some ~masterpiece because it really, really wasn't. fan-service the movie? sure. but a coherent and satisfying plot? no.

I haaaaaaaated Endgame
I would have walked out but I was there with a friend and she drove :/

The live action Cinderella with Lily James. It was pretty to look at, but so damn boring. I nearly fell asleep in the theater.

I liked it because I'm a sucker for Cinderella stories, no matter what. But also because Richard Madden was so goddamn beautiful in it. Also the ballroom dance was my favorite thing.

(Anonymous) - 2020-05-30 22:49 (UTC) - Expand

The only bits that actually affected me were the parts with the prince and his dying father because I went with my sick mom who died a couple years later and any storyline that touched on sick and dying parents like that was gonna make me cry. But Cinderella herself? Idk. Boring and unconvincing. Ever After Drew Barrymore is so awesome by comparison I can barely remember anything about her except I rolled my eyes a lot.

Her dress was pretty but I’m still mad the actress was on a starvation diet and Disney/the press made such a big deal about how tiny her waist was, which eventually turned into Emma Watson’s Belle ballroom gown looking cheap as shit and perpetuating the whole “corsets are torture devices devised by the patriarchy” shitshow.

Corsets can be torture devices (see “I couldn’t eat solid food during the shoot”) but they are mostly just foundation garments like bras (which can also suck if they don’t fit the wearer) and Watson was definitely wearing shapewear of some kind under her costumes.

Sorry. It’s petty as hell but I really hated Watson’s Belle ballgowns.

loool I just answered this in the comment on #9 with the Felix the Cat movie.

"Mamma Mia" was the first film I ever watched that had me NOTICING everything that was off about it.

(Anonymous) - 2020-05-30 21:52 (UTC) - Expand

type_wild - 2020-05-30 22:04 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) - 2020-05-31 03:19 (UTC) - Expand

Probably The Ugly Truth. My friends and I all left the theater and agreed never to talk about it again.

The Neverending Story 2. I got to watch it for free, and still walked out.

Batman & Robin

Mortal Kombat: Annihilation

The Pauly Shore movie Son-in-Law. My mom and I had some time to kill on a hot day and she’d heard it was funny. I was maybe 10 and it was the first time I’d ever thought to ask someone I was seeing a movie with if we could leave, like it really had never occurred to me that that was an option.

Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within. My older sister had just gotten her license at the time and took me to see it at the nearby discount theater. The theater was located on the far end of this dead mall and I remember the two of us walking through the empty halls on the way back to her car afterward just ripping this movie to shreds, it was so bad.

(Anonymous) - 2020-05-30 22:47 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) - 2020-05-30 23:55 (UTC) - Expand

It might have been Disney's Black Cauldron.

Or something that was on syndication that was so bad I tuned out and turned the channel.

Mac & Me.

On the television side, that weirdass anti-drug musical special “Cartoon All Stars,” with the Muppet Babies and Garfield and the Ninja Turtles all losing their minds on a kid for considering weed.

(Anonymous) - 2020-05-31 03:02 (UTC) - Expand

I've liked lots of movies that are objectively bad. Snakes on a Plane was hella entertaining, but no one thinks it should have won an Oscar.

If we're going with "what critically acclaimed movie first made you doubt critical acclaim as a marker of an enjoyable movie," then Howard's End, probably. That movie was weird in that all the actors delivered excellent performances and the movie as a whole still managed to be a miserable slog.

When you grow up on network TV programming, you get exposed to a lot of stuff that gets broadcast because it's cheap and fills in dead air. I barely remember seeing Hawk the Slayer.

That, and sneaking in viewings of Sammy Terry's b-movie schlock. Even PBS had a b-movie sci-fi show.