[ SECRET POST #4972 ]

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⌈ Secret Post #4972 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 39 secrets from Secret Submission Post #712.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: To you, what is necessary for a same-sex relationship to be considered canon?

[(Anonymous)]

OP

Realized after typing this that there's some kind of spoilery bits about Elementary below, wanted to mention that just in case

for me it's not, "they display hints of sexual interest in each other so it's love," it's, "they look like they're in love".

Oh, definitely. Whether I think the relationship is romantic is a completely different thing than whether I think they're banging behind the scenes, and thinking they're having sex offscreen/page is not at all necessary to think they're in love (didn't mean to imply that I thought that if I did; just that I've come across people who seem to have that standard, a "well, if there aren't sex scenes then I don't consider it canon" kind of thing).

Like, in the book I mentioned in the original post, there's zero sexual content, and I could even see the case being made that one or both characters could be asexual to some degree, but for me there's no doubt that they're in love based on how they act. There's disagreement online about whether or not the relationship is romantic, and maybe for some people, the lack of sex is the reason for that disagreement, I don't know, but for me personally, it's not required for me to consider it a romantic relationship.

I mean, obviously people define things differently, and for a lot of people, it seems like romance is this formula of friendship+sex, and if you subtract the sex, then it ceases being romance and goes back to being friendship. Whereas for me, romance and friendship are two separate things, and sex isn't the deciding factor (I feel like you can add sex to friendship and it doesn't automatically become romance; friends with benefits is a thing). I think for me, commitment is the defining thing. Like, if you decide someone is the most important person to you, and you make a commitment to them, that's what makes it romantic to me, regardless of whether sex is a factor.

It's a het example, but there's Elementary. They were very clear about the characters not having sex, but by the end, you had another character comparing their relationship to their own marriage, lots of "love" discussion, and there was this commitment to just having a life together (and, it was implied, raising a kid together). So because of all of that (plus a bunch of other things throughout the show), I couldn't help but see it as romantic, even if not in the "traditional" sense.

Sorry, I've gotten way off topic here, but I find the relationships that don't quite easily fit into any sort of conventional boxes to be the most interesting ones to read about/watch.