fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #4995 ]

[ SECRET POST #4995 ]

⌈ Secret Post #4995 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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01. https://i.imgur.com/2SrISny.png

I subscribe whole-heartedly to your newsletter!

The problem with a lot of romance (for me personally) is that most of it never attempts to question or address WHY they are falling in love. What about the other person do they love? What, psychologically, is happening in the relationship?

Drives me batty.

So often it's two attractive people who've made eye contact a few times and now they're in love (we're told) so the audience is expected to go along with it.

To be fair, that's how this works in real life as well. The only difference between a best friend and a lover is how attracted you are to the person, not what they do.

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(Anonymous) - 2020-09-09 10:02 (UTC) - Expand

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(Anonymous) - 2020-09-09 11:17 (UTC) - Expand

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(Anonymous) - 2020-09-09 12:42 (UTC) - Expand

This is basically why I ship like no het parings, everything is so boring and not that engaging.

That is why I avoid a lot of slash ship fanfic of hetero characters. Too many are just the writer taking two people and smashing them together until they kiss.

ayrt

Damn right, and even then, the "smashing them together" is often times more literal than not, with what the actors have to work with... Yeesh.

This!

I actively want more good, compelling het ships but it's hard. Just finding two characters who are both well-developed and interesting and have an interesting relationship with each other... it's quite rare.

God, yes, this. I thought I just wasn't into shipping until I saw a canon relationship that actually showed all the little gestures of caring and built up the relationship over time, and I just about died of The Feels. Turns out it just needs to be an actual relationship. Who knew?

Yeah, if I'm going to care about the romance at all then both characters have to be developed and compelling enough for me to a) care about them at all and b) believe that they'd both see something worth pursuing in each other

Gods, this! I just want the writers to convince me that these people *like* each other! At minimum! None of this "two conventionally attractive people make eye contact and wE kNoW wHaT tHaT mEaNs!" bullshit, come on!

Yes. Agreed.

Sometimes, in books that aren't supposed to be romances, I find it's because the author don't take the words to really flesh out the characters. Usually for one of 2 reasons. 1) they haven't written the characters enough to feel comfy writing slice of life. Or 2) they've brought these characters in from someplace else (like fanfic) and assume that the reader is psychic and know instantly they're supposed to be IN LOVE.

No. Please. Write them doing normal things. Build trust. Do not have your character spilling about their HORRIBLE past on the first date. Show me. Do not tell me. Do not say "oh they're attracted it's love..." I will dock points.

Now, in traditional publishing I understand it. Debut books being allowed 80K words. (Established writers have different rules.) They might not have the words and those scenes might have been cut because "it's not moving the plot forward." (Which is dumb. but fine, trad commercial fiction annoys me anymore.) In Indie books, where you SET the rules and don't have to worry about it because it's Print on Demand. Uh. I don't get it at all. Nope.

Of course, my one indie book series is majorly slow burn romance where the guy is in extreme denial and the girl is going "nope, can't. In power position. Must wait. He'll probably not like me by then. Whine. But I will be strong and not take advantage of my subordinate/pupil." (He is older than her, it's a biker club situation. She's a full member, he's trying to join.) (Sigh. The Lone Prospect. Amazon. Just in case anyone cares.)

I also wish they'd stop throwing romance into my action movies unless it's like Mr. and Mrs. Smith and a romance movie DISGUISED as an action movie. Thanks. Honestly, Mr. and Mrs. Smith is the Ocean's 11 reboot of how to do romances and friendships. See also The Mummy. For established: the Addam's Family.

Yeah, I agree with this. I remember being so surprised and delighted when I read Barbra Hambly’s ‘Those Who Hunt The Night’ and the main character, after a vampire coerced him by threatening his wife, went home and told her. It shocked me so much, because so much of the time you don’t get that. Basic communication and relying on each other. So many stories rely on angst and ‘I must suffer in silence to save her’, and it just surprised me so much.

When so many het romances are so samey and rely on so many of the same tropes, it is noticeable when you stumble across something different, something that actually gives you an idea why they’re together. How they function together.

Or even just makes it interesting. I remember being giddily delighted by Ivan and Victoria in RED, as well, despite it being a ridiculous action comedy with a dodgy main pairing, because how often do you get two vicious old spies/assassins who’ve loved each other across enemy lines, and whose sign of true devotion is that she once shot him three times in the chest to prove her loyalty to her country, instead of three times in the head? They’re ridiculously extra and romantic and fun, in a rabid sort of way, and it’s amazing.

Just, throw some things in. Talking to each other. Joking. Some backstory. A connection that other characters don’t have. Guinevere Pettigrew and Joe Blomfield in ‘Miss Pettigrew Lives For A Day’, two battered, earnest older people who remember the first world war, in the midst of giddy young things desperately trying to ignore the dawn of the second. Something to show why these two, of all people, would choose each other.

It really is noticeable how much dreck there is when you feel surprised and delighted to get something more once in a while.

Oh man, Ivan and Victoria! Ohhhh I loved them so much (ﾉ*>∀<)ﾉ♡

I just wish there were more lesbian relationships. Most mainstream media has been including male gay relationships but you rarely see positive female gay relationships unless it's a niche show. Even Lifetime network is advertising a movie where two guys fall in love for Christmas. When am I going to get the Lifetime movie where Jane and Sarah fall in love?

It's funny you say that, because I've been finding way more lesbian relationships in media lately than I have gay male ones.

I've been seeing a lot more lesbians recently, but I do tend to watch genre shows - Killjoys, Haunting of Hill House, Wynonna Earp. I hope you get your mainstream lesbian romance!

Define "mainstream media", because that hasn't been my experience at all.

Same. There are way too many romances that come out of nowhere or that are written to seem romantic, but are just weird and creepy.

See also: 'the writers spent ages slowly and carefully developing the friendship between the main character and his best (male) friend, meanwhile main character and Designated Female Love Interest have exchanged glances exactly once and the writers wonder why everyone's shipping the slash pairing.'

The other thing I hate about Compulsory Het is when you do have two well-developed characters and there is a slow, well-written buildup...then the moment they get together the woman's life/goals/philosophy/character is subordinate to the man's and everything he says goes. See: Bones, Fringe.

Word.

Yes, this so much! I was really, truly shocked when I watched Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries and by half way through the first season found i was rooting for TWO het couples for the first time in... probably ever? And it is just because it spends the time and effort developing their relationships. I didn't realise how rare that kind of thing actually was until it clicked.

I love the design of this secret.

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