fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #721 ]

⌈ Secret Post #721 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

101.

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102.

[Hiroshi Tamaki;Gackt;Tadayoshi Okura]

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103.

[Rumor Has It/Simon and Garfunkel]

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104.

[Chip 'n Dale]

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105.

[Sarah McLachlan, "World on Fire"]

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106.

[Phoenix Wright Justice for All]

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107.

[17 Kids and Counting; Jon and Kate plus 8]

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108.

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109.

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110.

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111.

[Persona 4]

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112.

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113.

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114.

[Smallville]

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115.

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116.

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117.

[Tiny Toons]

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118.

[Alicia Sacramone]

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119.

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120.

[House]

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121.

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122.

[Dungeons and Dragons; Mage the Ascension]

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123.

[Merlin]

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124.

[Noel & Michael Fielding; The Mighty Boosh]

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125.

[Watchmen, The Day The Earth Stood Still]

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126.

[Shawn Spencer from Psych]

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127.

[Merlin, Torchwood]

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128.

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129.

[House]

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130.

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131.

[Victoria Beckham/Posh Spice]

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132.

[Temeraire Series]

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133.

[Ace Attorney]

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134.

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135.

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136.

[Captain America/Iron man]

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137.

[Fullmetal Alchemist (Winry), Serenity (Kaylee), Final Fantasy X (Rikku), Atlantis (Audrey)]

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138.

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139.

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140.

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141.

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142.

[It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia]

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143.

[Digimon Tamers, Juri Kato]

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144.

[Torchwood, Dr. Horrible, Metal Gear Solid]

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145.

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146.

[Onani Master Kurosawa]

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147.

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148.

[Supernatural]

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149.

[Gossip Girl]

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150.

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151.

[Ferris Bueller's Day Off]

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152.

[Death Note: the Last Name]

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153.

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154.

[Gundam00]

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155.

[Robin Hood: Guy/Sheriff]

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156.

[bexless's MCR Priestverse (I Have Been All Things Unholy and Staring Through the Demons)]

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157.

[Digimon original series]

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158.

[In the Gloaming/Robert Sean Leonard]

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159.

[Candy Boy ONA]

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160.

[Soul Eater]

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161.

[Gurren Lagann]

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162.

[Sherlock Holmes/"Sherlock"]

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163.

[Supernatural]

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164.

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165.

[Genevieve Cortese, Wildfire, Supernatural]

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166.

[Mai HiME, Okuzaki Akira]

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167.

[Sweeny Todd movie]

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168.

[Sean Astin/Elijah Wood]

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169.

[Silent Hill: Homecoming]

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170.

[Trigun, Wolfwood]

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171.

[Moulin Rouge/Sound of Music]

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172.

[Avatar the Last Airbender, Fullmetal Alchemist, Bleach, Naruto]

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173.

[Mock the Week; Frankie Boyle]

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174.

[Whose Line Is It Anyway?, QI]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #103.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 3 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Like I said, I don't expect people to answer for their decisions. I think it's selfish to have your own kid if you have the ability to adopt, and no one has ever given me an argument for it I thought was viable. But it's not like I'm demanding that people explain themselves. Obviously I can't control their reproductive habits, and I don't want to. I rarely even express this opinion, much less try and get people to adopt it.

(Haha, no pun intended @ last sentence.)

At the moment, we are not in a position to. Nor were we when we conceived our son. Free healthcare for military = less expensive baby. We have no trouble keeping up with food/diaper/clothing costs. In a few years, when we're out of the navy and into a better job (with his work he could be making a LOT in the civilian world) and we're done having two or three bioligically, we do very much hope to adopt a few. Probably slightly older kids, not infants. As much as I love babies...I'll skip that part and feel ok lol.

My personal reasons for not just waiting to adopt in the first place? I wanted to experience the pregnancy, the birth, all of it myself. I guess that can be considered a selfish reason. But there you have it. We still waited a few years into the marriage to have a baby, and it was planned. We were ready and we're thriving.

It's also amazing to watch him grow, see his personality take shape, see some of us and parts that are ALL him.

So there ya go. Probably not viable reasons but they are enough for me, and I'm content with it. And will probably be offending you again in the near future and having another. ;)

Thank you for disagreeing and not being a lunatic about it.

You're right, I do think that having a biological child because you want to experience pregnancy is a selfish reason. And IMO, so is the desire to see yourself in a child. I mean, really, I can't think of anything more self-centered than that. (Though I also know that many people who raise kids do it with complete selflessness, so I guess in some cases it balances out?).

I also don't think people understand that my opinion on this is completely circumstantial– I wouldn't consider it selfish if there weren't so many orphans in the world and children with shitty, hopeless home lives.

I also don't understand the desire for it because, at this point in my life, I never want to be pregnant, ever. I have nightmares about it. So I understand that at least part of my opinion comes from really not comprehending the desire to have a biological kid.

I don't think you're an awful person and I wouldn't wish for some kind of law against having biological kids. I would never want someone who wants to experience biological parenthood to not have the option. I just wish adoption was even on the table for more people, and that more people chose it.

Ah, but how the tables can turn. You not wanting to experience pregnancy is viewed by some as selfish. "Couldn't you suffer through for your kids?!" It's all in the eye of the perceiver. One could also spin you adopting children as selfish, because you get that goody goody badge of honor that you get to show off. "Look how awesome I am, I jumped through a million hoops to get my kids!" And no, I don't think you did it for that reason at all, but you see how easily the lines between whats selfish and what isn't blur greatly from one person to the next? Can you understand how people would get VERY bent out of shape, especially with you calling them raving lunatics? Lol (And especially what some people go through to conceive their own)

Not going to argue points with you here. We agree on the basics. I really do wish the adoption system were completely rehauled and more people that could adopt, would. More importantly I think we need a better system for sex education and better contraceptives would be nice.

Also, my "desire" to see myself in my kids, and vice versa, is not a NEED. No, I do not HAVE to have that with my kids. I simply meant it was fun and interesting, and it still is to hang out with my parents and see the similarities. I don't believe our personalities are 100% nature so I'm sure you still get to pass on some quirks to your children adopted or no.

And it can't be entirely selfish because pregnancy, even an "easy" one, is not easy. It's a huge strain physically and emotionally, and most women never have the same body afterwards they did before. Stretch marks, saggy boobs (oh, at the ripe age of 21 even! Lol) and many times scars to the perineum or if you had a c-section, your abdomen. It can be likened in many ways to the difficulty and strains of adopting I think. And if you look at it statistically, maybe the 2-3 I one day have will mean 2-3 less born to uncaring parents. Yes, I do still hope to one day adopt, but in the meantime I enjoy doing it my way. :)

(And sorry for the late post, was visiting family in no-interwebz-land)

You not wanting to experience pregnancy is viewed by some as selfish.

Only by the very stupid. A non-existant child is not going to suffer because I didn't have it.

Can you understand how people would get VERY bent out of shape, especially with you calling them raving lunatics?

Except that I don't call them that until they start acting that way (i.e. anonymice screaming and insulting in all caps above). I think if your immediate and lasting response to the opinion is blind rage, it's probably a guilty conscience.

And it can't be entirely selfish because pregnancy, even an "easy" one, is not easy.

No, I never said it was. I said that I know many people who are parents of biological children give up a LOT. I respect that sacrifice. The only thing I think is selfish is the decision to pick a biological child over an adopted one when both options are viable to you.

[ SECRET POST #721 ]

Re: 107, 108, 135, 158, 169

Re: 107, 108, 135, 158, 169

Re: 107, 108, 135, 158, 169

Re: 107, 108, 135, 158, 169

Re: 107, 108, 135, 158, 169

Re: 107, 108, 135, 158, 169