[ SECRET POST #5065 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #5065 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 35 secrets from Secret Submission Post #725.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

08. https://i.imgur.com/L2SVoHj.png

[wannabe_influential]

It's amazing to me how the writers came up with a character who clearly has some kind of eating disorder and then played it all for a joke at the character's expense

[greghousesgf]

it doesn't surprise me at all, a lot of media is really into fat bashing. It's annoying as fuck.

[(Anonymous)]

I've never seen this episode, nor will I look it up because it sounds horrible, but I'm so sorry, OP...

[(Anonymous)]

For me, I was at the doctor's office and it was an episode where Ross dates one of his students then gets mad/worried because she's going on a spring break trip. He decides to completely crash the trip and just shows up at the airport. Then the credits roll.

As someone who went to grad school and did grad student research it's just ew ew ew ew ew ew. And yes, I know it would still be gross to people outside of my experience but it was even more of an ethically gross thing to me.

[greghousesgf]

I never heard about that episode, that is creepy

[(Anonymous)]

There's more to that plot line than just that, and some of it is played as a bit of an ew gross thing. I think he does end up losing his job over it? Causes issues at the very least.

[sparklywalls]

It's ok for something like that to hit you with a very real feeling, especially because Friends didn't exactly handle it sensitively.

But overall, don't feel anything bad about having to do what's best for you. In a relationship you don't have to take part in absolutely everything the other person does. This is no exception. I hope that someday you might be able to talk to your partner about it but you don't have to either. You've probably already anticipated some "talk to them" advice but idk, in my mind it's completely up to you what you want to share.

[(Anonymous)]

OP, I completely support your decision not be around while Friends is on. It is an awful show, for his and many other reasons.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm sorry, OP, that's awful and I don't think it's unreasonable for you to react that way at all.

[(Anonymous)]

There's a lot of jokes or skits in Friends that haven't aged well at all honestly, and the fat-jokes with Monica were some of the worst so I really don't blame you needing to remove yourself when those episodes are on. They're not just poking fun they're really mean-spirited and nasty.

[(Anonymous)]

I could never get into Friends, so I've only seen a few episodes. I've never seen this one, but it sounds really gross and I'm sorry it affected you like that.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm sorry you went through that Anon. I know nothing about Friends beyond posts on tumblr, but I have been in similar situations where friends want to watch stuff that has hit a nerve in terms of my own issues with eating and eating disorders;
(I had been fortunate enough to recover before it got too out of hand, but there are moments like fat jokes or gags about ED that had thrown me off guard and put me in a weird head space for the rest of the day while pretending nothing had affected me around friends I was watching stuff with).

Keeping yourself safe first by knowing what to avoid is a good idea Anon x

[(Anonymous)]

If you want your relationship to work you have to communicate. If this is serious then you need to be open with them, I image you watch the show to spend time together even though you weren't too fond of the show in the first place. I'm worried that suddenly changing that ritual without a conversation might cause a drift in your relationship.

[(Anonymous)]

I've gotten triggered from an episode of Gilmore Girls, OP. I hope you're feeling okay now.

[(Anonymous)]

why the fuck would you not tell your partner this so *they* can make a decision on whether they want to watch something that might trigger you what kind of relationship is this where you martyr yourself for a tv show without their knowledge

[(Anonymous)]

This. You don’t even have to make a big deal of it, just say “I don’t like this show, can we watch something else?” You’re adults and equals, can you not talk casually to your SO about something as arbitrary as a 20 year old sitcom?

[(Anonymous)]

Late response- but I assume you're the same asshole who shit the bed and tried their best to make everyone else's day shit because of it.

No.
Fuck no.

That's not how conversation works.

What you're mentioning OP to do is just a bunch of passive aggressive bullshit that's only going to cause argument, conflict, and frustration, in their relationship.

Clearly OP was willing to watch the show until it triggered them.
Tossing down something like that of the blue- as if OP's SO should have somehow /known/ about everything OP was struggling with without a single word spoken, (before OP was triggered, and likely before their SO felt it was right to breach the subject)- effectively blaming their SO for not reading OP's mind. Encouraging OP to make snide remarks, disregard their SO's happiness they get from the time the shared watching their shows together, that, all of a sudden the show they enjoyed for so long is no longer valid because 'they should have known OP didn't like it as much as they did, and now no one gets to be happy!'

Be as self centred as you want, but don't think that it can pass as actual relationship advice.

[(Anonymous)]

I totally get it. I had a similar moment with Big Bang Theory in college, because some of my roommates looooved that show and watched it a couple times a week. There was an episode where the end-of-the episode gag is that Raj sleeps with a plus-sized cosplayer.

I said it was a gross joke and asked if they could turn it off, and they were like "I think you're being a little too sensitive." I pointed out the joke was not just "ha ha, Raj got drunk and slept with a fat girl", the "twist" of the joke was that his response to waking up to find this out was that, instead of freaking out about the horror of sleeping with a fat girl, he was excited. Like straight-out "omg, he's so happy he got laid he doesn't care it was with a fat girl! What a loser!", with a girl that was my size. And then I asked what about WASN'T supposed to be offensive to me? Because yeah, they all laughed at the joke.

It got real awkward real fast. It's super gross, happens all the time, and I hate it.

[(Anonymous)]

Friends is such a problematic show the transphobia the lack of other races the fatphobia the jokes i just can't do it