fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #773 ]

⌈ Secret Post #773 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 12 pages, 300 secrets from Secret Submission Post #111.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 3 4 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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Although the Dragon has to leave when it gets dark since Merlin and Arthur can see him WATCHING FROM THE WINDOW; you're not fooling anyone, Slash Dragon, you're as big as a house!

(And really, as if it could be anyone else outside mumbling about Destiny. A LITTLE CREEPY.)

Oh lord, it's funny because it's so true.

This needs to be true.

Slash Dragon: I am only here to borrow sugar.
Merlin: No you are not.
Slash Dragon: It is your destiny, young Merlin, to lend me two cups of sugar.

...

Slash Dragon: *Flies away*

Soon it's been five, then ten times they've caught him outside the window and the Dragon doesn't even make up any new excuses. "Just how much sugar do you use?" Merlin asks.

And the Dragon's excuse is that he's a dragon, duh, so he goes through all of his food fairly fast, including sugar. But when Arthur suggests that he just buys him a bloody cane field or a silo or something, the dragon says that it wouldn't be neighborly to impose.

He also says that Arthur and Merlin are intertwined like the ribbons of a candy cane and other weirdnesses.

It grows progressively weirder when the Dragon continues this theme, popping in to ask for sugar and telling a confused Arthur and Merlin that they are so sweet and delicious they practically give him cavities.

Arthur isn't sure if the Dragon is saying he won't eat them or if this is another strange destiny thing.

And this leads to Merlin thinking that this might mean that he needs to brush the dragon's teeth and he goes to Arthur who's had hunting dogs and probably knows something about their dental care (Arthur also has the most excellent teeth in the kingdom), but Arthur sends Merlin to Gwen because it's the servants who do that sort of thing.

Gwen explains that neither her lady nor herself ever owned hunting dogs and that it's not her problem anyways because it's not their Slash Dragon (Merlin thinks that he might have sensed a little bit of jealousy in her tone at that point, but also thinks that IF Morgana and Gwen had a Slash Dragon they would realize how tiring it is fairly quickly) and then consults some magical texts and decides to make a go for it himself.

After nearly chocking the last Dragon in the realm to oblivion, Uther comes ever the closer to accepting Merlin as the best manservant his son could ever have, and the Slash Dragon doesn't bother Merlin or Arthur for several days in a fit of pique.

Also, Gwen and Morgana get a Slash Pegasus, so HA!

A perfect ending!

(Until the Dragon decides he's put up with Merlin's idiocy before, it's not like this is a new thing, and decides telling them that really, truly, together they are whole, and will Arthur just give Merlin a crown already, it's not like everyone doesn't already KNOW, but that's a story for another day.)

Oh god I SO want there to be a Slash Pegasus now.

I imagine her appearing amidst rainbows and Pink (the singer and the colour). She's as much into destiny as the Slash Dragon, but the two don't get along because he disapproves of her vegetarianism and she hates how he keeps singing Katy Perry at the top of his lungs -- the Slash Pegasus feels that Katy Perry's music is damaging to women and is just cribbing from the more talented Christina Aguilera anyway.

Okay, someone is going to be required to write this into a full-fledged fic, now.

The Slash Dragon and Slash Pegasus also have very different methods. The Pegasus has the philosophy that the Slash Dragon should let the kids figure things out on their own, and could really be a bit subtler about the whole prophecy thing, since he's just making it too obvious.

But the Dragon is quick to point out that Gwen and Morgana are much smarter than the boys, so the Pegasus has an unfair advantage. The Pegasus retorts that Morgana's part in Gwen's father's death is an Angst Bomb waiting to go off, so she doesn't have it too easy, either. Then they fight over whose secret, Merlin's magic or Morgana's meddling, is worse.

This would be a very silly story.

The Pegasus has the philosophy that the Slash Dragon should let the kids figure things out on their own, and could really be a bit subtler about the whole prophecy thing, since he's just making it too obvious

That's creepy, because I was just seeing:

The Slash Pegasus will disguise her disdain for the Slash Dragon under the sweet, tinkling voice -- Two sides of the same coin? Paths lying together? Really, Dragon, you might as well tell them that Arthur Pendragon's destiny is atop Merlin and be done with it. You have no sense of tact.

And the Dragon will snort (purposely aiming the bit of resulting fire at the Pegasus' tail) and say, Yes, well, we've seen how well that has worked. We can't all rely on flowers and girly smiles and common sense.

And at various points the Pegasus will think she could probably do a much better job getting the two boys together, and ponder the ways she might be rid of the Dragon. If she weren't so sweet, that is.

Edited 2009-02-17 01:41 (UTC)

Although boys would be a bit outside the Slash Pegasus' jurisdiction -- yes, girls like ponies, boys like dinosaurs is SO gender normative, but if you mention this the Slash Pegasus will shoot hearts, sparkles, and peace into your kneecaps through her eyes -- Merlin's eyelashes and Arthur's lips might give her some wiggle room.

But the Slash Dragon seems just so attached to them that she can't quite smudge him out... even when he is oblivious as to WHY one of his charges was to pissed when the Dragon doomed both his mothers. Besides, Morgana's dabblings in revolutionary espionage and Gwen's beating, bleeding, "everyone is marvelous, I could just fall in love with all of them and pick them lavenders" heart keeps her quite busy.

She feels that they should get her an apple and groom her wings more often, because without her Camelot would have imploded long ago.

[ SECRET POST #773 ]

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