[ SECRET POST #5835 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #5835 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 21 secrets from Secret Submission Post #835.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Idk, for me, either all misgendering, even in jest is okay or all is bad. I don't see why someone conservative calling, for example, nonbinary people "it" in an attempt to be funny would be bad but someone being all precious by calling men "she" and "babygirl" wouldn't be.
Both is intentionally misgendering people on purpose in an attempt to be funny.

[(Anonymous)]

Agreed. But I also hate the whole "anything goes in the name of comedy" mindset, so maybe I'm in the minority on that.

[(Anonymous)]

Because one is a legitimate attempt to dehumanize, and the other is done affectionately, often by people who are trans or nonbinary themselves. I don't like it either, because it's twee and because it's honestly confused me in cases where it's used in fandoms I don't know that well (because I legit always wonder "is this person actually a woman or is it just fandom doing that thing they do sometimes?") but in the end it's merely annoying.

+1

[(Anonymous)]

like... come on

[(Anonymous)]

It's irrelevant whether the person doing it does it to be mean or not. Don't intentionally misgender people.

[(Anonymous)]

The other thing you don't understand is that misgendering isn't something you can do to cis people. The idea of misgendering was never meant to apply to them. You can call them the wrong gender, which is rude unless they give permission first, but that's all it is: rude. Talking about misgendering cis people is pulling the same card as "reverse racism."

The male celebrities and characters who fans call girl and she are all cis as far as everyone knows. Respectful fans would never do that to a trans man. The only danger here is that potentially there will be a trans male celebrity who transitioned before becoming famous and is not out as trans, so he'll be assumed cis and called girl and she by fans.

[(Anonymous)]

Butch lesbian women get misgendered with malicious intent all the time so no, it's not just something that applies to trans people.
Respectful fans shouldn't misgender anyone.

[(Anonymous)]

As a butch cis women I get misgendered all the time and I wish people wouldn't. I'm respectful to my trans friends so I wish I could tell them please show me the same respect.

Misgendering anyone, even in jest, is disrespectful.

[(Anonymous)]

"is pulling the same card as "reverse racism.""

Well yeah, because there's nothing reverse about it. Stereotyping a group of people entirely because of what they look like or where you think they came from is just... racism.

You can talk about different people having different power to act on that, sure. Institutional racism is a huge problem.

But racism is just racism, don't get precious about it.

[(Anonymous)]

No. It’s not being “precious”, it’s just a fact. Reverse racism is different from racism because of the power imbalance that you mentioned and tried to dismiss like it was irrelevant. It’s not. It’s not racism to discriminate against white people, it’s reverse racism. Because it’s not the same kind of discrimination, and it doesn’t lead to the type of societal effects and harm racism has on non-white people. I used to think like you when I was right-wing and obstinate to new concepts in my youth. But I was incorrect then like you are now.

[(Anonymous)]

Imo it's better understood as something akin to trans headcanons than as misgendering

[(Anonymous)]

No. It is not the same at all. You are conflating mean spirited humor with norm breaking sensuality, two very different topics.

[(Anonymous)]

Nope. Both is intentional misgendering. The intention behind it is irrelevant.

[(Anonymous)]

Da

The intention behind it very much is relevant.

[(Anonymous)]

It isn't. Either intentional misgendering is bad or it isn't.

[(Anonymous)]

It’s not really always the same as misgendering, and that’s why intention does matter. Calling someone “babygirl” is different in concept than calling someone “baby girl”, it’s just one of those fandom/internet terms that takes on a new meaning of it’s own. I don’t like it and would never use it, because it’s stupid sounding and infantilizing imo. But it doesn’t feel like the same thing as misgendering to me, intentionally or otherwise. I can’t speak for all trans people when I say this though, just myself as a trans man.

[(Anonymous)]

You can whistle at your wife and say ‘hey, sexy baby’ and it’s probably fine. You should never do that to a stranger on the street. It may be slightly weird or rude to tag a tumblr post about Captain America with *wolf whistle*, hey sexy baby. You didn’t just sexually harass real life Captain America. These sorts of things are never black and white. That’s the sort of attitude that leads to white people insisting that taco night is cultural appropriation.