Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2023-02-19 04:53 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2023-02-19 04:53 pm
[ SECRET POST #5889 ]
⌈ Secret Post #5889 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 35 secrets from Secret Submission Post #843.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
Re: True Crime Opinions – General
(Anonymous) 2023-02-20 04:01 am (UTC)(link)I have a personal theory that murder stories, true or fiction, will always interest women because we are always surrounded by death, especially "a murder of passion". I made a passive comment dropping what I thought was an interesting - yet fucked up - fact that high murder rates used to be a thing in the US because a lot of women were murdering their husbands. Murder rates went down significantly when divorce became legal. And through the years, now we hear stories of a woman leaving an abusive partner and ending up dead.
Be brutalized and stripped of your power until you murder the man, then.
Be brutalized and stripped of your power until you leave and then then man murders you, now.
We can't expect society to take care of us so what we do is consume true crime. We can't face the truth that this is a systemic fuckup that will take a lot of work and harm and decades to try to improve, so we're just going to make girlboss memes about "stay sexy don't get murdered".
Not all those who consume true crime stuff are morally bankrupt, but I do wish those creating the stuff wouldn't cater to those people. If you want to consume something as fucked up as murder, which often comes with heavy topics like abuse and violence, then confront your dark curiosities.
I don't get why people don't do that? I hate being all "not like other girls" but one of my friends keeps saying things like "there's probably something wrong with me *nervous laugh*" whenever they talk about consuming true crime stuff, horror films lulling them to sleep. If they're worried that there might be something wrong with them, they should go see a therapist. If they think this makes them edgy and cool IDK...why do they think that?
Me? I got into true crime because it's just something that I've always sort of been into? I don't really talk to people about it because no one's ever really asked me about it. I do know that when I was in my 20s I constantly asked myself "what is it about this stuff that I find so interesting?" Long, deep searches within me, in a chaotic messed up world I will always wonder why messed up things happens. Like, i could really go into details, but I won't. I don't dress this up as a "fun" hobby because I do realize how screwed up it is dress it up that way. I've always seen it more as a quest for the truth.
Like IDK if being neurodivergent I can compartmentalize a macabre interest as something dark and in need of serious focus, and not get worked up over this whole social fear of "I'm getting a rushing feeling getting into this fucked up story, does this mean I'm enjoying this?"
Like, you can find something interesting and not attach it to this idea of "because I find it interesting = I like and approve of this". Like, yeah, obviously if you do consume something of murky origins and come out of with positive feelings, I think you should question the content of character, but YOU need to do the job. Don't rely on your surroundings for the "OK".
Like, Jeffrey Dahmer?
I never understood the fascination surrounding him?
Based solely upon his pictures, I found him a "regular" looking guy.
Hearing about his personal life, sounds like he had a fucked up life.
Hearing about the crimes he committed, sounds like he was a disturbed person who got away with dehumanizing and killing people due to a system that cares not at all for POC who are also poor and/or queer.
Learning about Jeffrey Dahmer the "person" is part of the series of crimes he committed, but the story doesn't start and end with him and should not even center around him the majority of the time. We need to give focus on him but we should not make a mythical figure out of him.
Same thing with a situation like the cult around Charles Manson and lives he ruined. Instead of being all, "How could this guy charm so many people to do such fucked up shit?" I wonder, "What was going on in culture and these kids' lives that Charles Manson did what he did for as long as he did?" And there are like....a million other things going on around that whole shit than just constantly focusing on Manson the mythical cult leader.
All of this focus on specifics distracts us from looking at ourselves. And it sucks. LOL Instead of being able to be like, "Yeah, we've all got to work past the dark shit that wants to hold us back," I feel like a lot of people are still defensively shouting, "I'm not a bad person! Here's a list of all the reasons why I'm a good person! I feel so judged for my interests so I'm going to turn this into a quirky personality trait to deflect from these scared uncomfortable feelings!"
And I just have to keep reminding them that I don't think they're a bad person, when I want us to move on from the defensiveness already. Because really, we can't do better and heal and learn and try to dismantle this fucked up system is to do better for our kids while holding the system accountable for failing us and demanding for the changes that need to happen.
It's not about YOU the individual (being the smart one so you'll be the Final Girl), it's about US a collection of people existing together (we live in a society together, this isn't a fucking movie, get your head out of "Main Character" mentality when thinking about scams, abusers, killers, etc.).
Re: True Crime Opinions – General
(Anonymous) 2023-02-20 11:24 pm (UTC)(link)Half my family lives in a country where we don't have to watch television to know what violence and death is like. It's not hidden from us. And we don't have the same fascination with it, because there's no mystery there. This experience versus other people's collective lack of experience is not meant as an accusation towards the first world: Western media is constantly lying about how amazingly good their methods of catching criminals are, when in fact, they're pretty incompetent at it and most of the police could hardly care less. The upper echelons of the security apparatus exist to make sure the really rich can sleep at night, without worrying about having their billions and trillions redistributed to other people. The police mostly exist to protect the government from overthrow and beat up citizens when they exercise their hypothetical right to protest against it. And "detectives" are some of the scummiest petty mercenaries you will ever come across. So ... it seems to me like the more you know about how laws get made and broken and by who and why they're enforced selectively and all the rest of that, the less it's possible to take the most basic orthodoxies of copaganda seriously.
I think you get more real insight about lawbreaking by becoming the sort of person that other people can trust to not rat them out (if you didn't start out that way) than you ever will by paying attention to nervous, media-reliant middle-class speculation about "crime." Even when the speculation is coming from people with advanced degrees in the subject.
I realize what I'm saying is off and to one side of your comment. I'm replying anyway because you seem to actually want to actually understand stuff, long past the point where the media wants to say "okay, our time slot's up, go home everyone."