[ SECRET POST #6043 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6043 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 35 secrets from Secret Submission Post #864.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

DA

Some of both of these. But I have to feel a little bad for sexually inexperienced people when there's a whole internet full of personal anecdotes of how sex works, and what's more fun and less fun and just plain fiddly or funny or whatever, that they're not digging into.

When you can easily tell a writer is a virgin, something's been getting in the way of their ability to research. I wrote sex scenes for years before it would have been remotely legal for me to have a man in my bed, and I look back and they're solidly good sex scenes. The main thing experience added, for me, was the insight that sex really does feel so good that there doesn't need to be some other point to doing it. Because before that, I'd agreed with Oscar Wilde's comment that "everything in the world is about sex, except sex. Sex is about power."

[(Anonymous)]

Uhh, as an asexual person who can’t write sex scenes to save her life (trust me!) no, there isn’t anything inherently wrong with people who can’t write sex scenes. Writing is difficult and we tend to be better at writing things we care for. I really tried to write smut because that’s what fandom likes apparently, until I realized it isn’t for me at all. Whenever I read what I tried to write I go “what… sort of drug I was into”. I am pretty sure I know more works with sex scenes than the average person because the romance draws me in. I know how it works. But maybe it’s my inability to fantasize it that makes me unable to write it. Trying to put myself in the shoes of a character of another sex who feels attraction is… oof how do some 15 year olds do it?

[(Anonymous)]

I dont think you being ace has anything to do with your inability to write good smut. Some people just can't write certain things. No big. Their talents lay elsewhere.

Signed, an asexual person who writes popular smut, among other things.

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT
And I knew someone would say that, because I know a lot of asexual people are comfortable writing smut. But for me at least, my lack of ability to fantasize is likely partly why I can’t do it. A romance scene, being spoiled, whatever? Sounds fantastic, sure I can do it. Drama? Had my share, can do. A sex scene where the person is enjoying it? I can read it and think “yes, that’s plausible, good for them!” however many times and I still won’t be able to write it. But maybe this is more the sex-repulsed part than the asexuality itself.

[randomdrops]

Interesting. Can you not write about other things that disgust you or you don't identify with? Like a murder mystery or something you wouldn't be able to write a convincing murderer? (Murder just as a random example, feel free to fill in anything else in your imagination there). Or are you one of the writers that really takes the "write what you know" to heart?

Either way is fine! It's not a judgement question, more that I just find how people work interesting.

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT
Hmmmmmm I never tried to write a murder mystery story but I suppose the murder bit would make me uncomfortable, yes. Not the mystery part though. I just think I would feel like I am not able to properly convey the angst of the character who lost their loved one for instance, because I thankfully never lost a loved one to murder - and I know some people are really good at writing things they have 0 experience in/0 interest in living, but for me that would be sort of difficult, yes. Since I write to vent/channel feelings if there’s nothing I can relate to, or nothing I feel like researching, it’s just not fun for me. And I think it shows in my writing… how much fun I had writing it.

[randomdrops]

That makes sense. For me writing is both what you described - working through feelings - and a fun exercise in imagination. I like to sometimes take someone that is the opposite of me and try to kind of imagine how they'd work and what it would feel like, like an extreme case of empathy.

I have a friend that is a little more like you - she likes to have at least one character that is kind of the stand in for her emotions but then she likes to research the hell out of everything and everyone else in the story and dive into things she doesn't know about.

Thanks for indulging my curiosity. People are fascinating to me and I love to discuss this stuff but I know sometimes my questions can come off as insulting or offensive which I definitely do not mean them to be.

[(Anonymous)]

Agreeing with this as a sexual person who has read plenty of great smut written by asexual people.

[(Anonymous)]

As an... inexperienced person who occasionally writes sex scenes I have had some *eye-opening* hours researching 'would that work' and various terminology.

Eye-opening.