[ SECRET POST #6353 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6353 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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[Honkai: Star Rail]



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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 22 secrets from Secret Submission Post #908.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

"Restrictive ideas about what it means to be a man or a woman" is just the woke way to say "Trans people aren't real; boys can wear dresses and still be boys/in my day we called that being a tomboy/nonbinary? more like girl who wants to be a special snowflake."

[(Anonymous)]

???

There can absolutely be trans people with restrictive ideas about what it means to be a man or a woman. It would be more surprising if there weren't, given that we live in a society inundated with restrictive ideas about what it means to be a woman.

That obviously does not undercut the legitimacy of trans identities in any way.

[(Anonymous)]

If we had more boys who feel comfortable wearing dresses and girls who are OK being tomboys, we would have much less nonbinary people or gender navel gazing in general.

[(Anonymous)]

DA

But I think we have a lot of boys in the US who are doing things their gender claims they're not allowed to do, and girls also. And that's been a thing for years - I lived in a very conservative part of the deep south in the 90's, a lot of my peers pointed to me when they wanted to argue with their parents that girls DID do any number of things they were being told that girls didn't do (like have really short hair and pick up slugs and love dinosaurs), and two of my best friends were boys who wanted to grow up to be a dancer and a chef, because they were genuinely passionate about cooking and dancing. We all had to push back against random adults who harassed us and tried to scare us into line by pretending that not LOOKING and ACTING like their idea of a boy or a girl made us the opposite of what we said we were, if interrogated, but our parents shielded us from being outright forced to conform. And it seems like the whole gender-neoword-identity-mountain has to try to erase the piles of people with experiences like mine in order to claim that they "speak" for poor, defenseless kids who don't conform to restrictive expectations feminism was challenging when my mother was in university. As if none of that ever happened. But I was friends with boys who were aspiring artists in elementary school and girls who grew up to be lawyers and all the rest all this time. I've been happily married to a woman for half a decade. I get into so many fewer (literal, physical) fights as an adult than I did as a kid. It's become so much less dangerous and the social fallout so much less disastrous to be gay. And yet, we have this ideology now that's trying to tell us that the only hope for gender non-conforming people to find peace or happiness is invasive medicalization. And that's being presented as something left-wing people are morally deficient if they don't automatically endorse.

[(Anonymous)]

Which, apart from the "trans people arent real" is entirely true, actually. 99% of nonbinaries are just the "not like the other girls/boys" of today, nothing more.

[(Anonymous)]

Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong.

[(Anonymous)]

Nah. Completely right. But it's okay to deny it, after all, self-delusion is part of the deal.

[(Anonymous)]

Explain.

[(Anonymous)]

So does me not wanting any genitals or tits make me "not like other girls?"

[(Anonymous)]

Possibly. I think NB dysphoria can exist but not wanting any sexed features feels more of a trauma response than anything else.

[(Anonymous)]

That sounds more like body dysmorphia/a type of mental disorder and not like a gender identity.

[(Anonymous)]

Damn the other replies to this are haters. That's cool. Idgaf what your personal reasons are or how you specifically identify cause idk you lol.

[(Anonymous)]

You realize there are trans individuals who are GNC though, right? Equating liking makeutus and dresses with being a woman invalidates not only cismen who like those things, but also trans men who only feel comfortable with thise things once they've transitioned. Same with women both cis and trans who like to present more masculine.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm very conflicted about this.
Because on one part, sure, sometimes people use this rhetoric to be transphobic, on the other hand there is my personal experience as a cis woman who is always "clocked" as non-binary and assigned by default the they/them pronoun in LGBTQ+ circles because I don't wear any make up, dress sporty all the time and don't shave (and I'm very VERY hairy. I have a light moustache and some beard, too).
I'm just a cis lesbian who doesn't shave, lol.
I actually got into "a fight" with someone (who was clearly not in their right mind at that moment. idk why tho) because they kept insisting that me NOT identifying as non-binary was actually transphobic? That was wild...

I have trans and enby friend who became very comfortable with themselves once they embraced their gender identities and I did the "what is gender????" journey, too, but at the end of the day it turns out I am cis. I just experience my gender differently from a lot of other people (i.e. for me my very hairy legs are actually more feminine than my shaved ones. strange I KNOW. humans are complex).
Being assigned a gender identity different from my own because I don't adhere to certain gender expectations by people from inside the LGBTQ+ community is something that I did not expect but yeah, it happens. Unfortunately to me it happens a lot, especially when I'm in circles with a lot of younger folks.

[(Anonymous)]

Similar experience! I went through a frustrating part of my life where I preferred he pronouns but liked dressing androgynously, I got called they/them, assumed to be transfeminine by people I had told I was not, and kept getting asked what my pronouns were and kept getting confused stares when I said "he." This wasn't an issue of not "looking like a guy" to others either, I was assumed to be a guy by everyone outside of a certain queer 18-early 20s bubble of acquaintances, who acted bewildered that I wasn't nonbinary or transfem just because I was gender nonconforming. Like they couldn't understand why I wouldn't just be nonbinary if I didn't dress like other guys, lol?? This is a super weird experience to talk about because plenty of people go through just the opposite, being surrounded by people who don't pick up on their nonconformity and presentation cues at all, and aren't trans accepting. I don't want to minimize that more common shitty experience. My experience was just very frustrating. Fwiw though as I've gotten older I've had many trans friends who are understanding of me being gnc, or gnc themselves, so it may be more of a young person issue, or just a certain type of weird community dynamic that comes up in some queer social spheres now and again...