[ SECRET POST #6387 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6387 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 32 secrets from Secret Submission Post #913.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Weird things that take you out of a story

[(Anonymous)]

When the epithets used (even sparingly) are not distinguishing - referring to the dark-haired woman when there are two in the scene, referring to the shorter man when the two men are of similar heights (Are you serious, author? I don't want to go to IMDb and look up how tall the actors are), or referring to the younger one when the characters' ages are within a few months of each other.

When a physical characteristic is wrong - eye color, height, hair color, nose shape (this comes up more than you'd think), lips, whatever.

When a character's speech is too realistic - with all the actual stutters, pauses, filler words, repeating words, wrong pronunciations, weird sentence constructions, sentence fragments, etc. A few here and there are fine and even necessary to convey casual speech, but putting them all in all the time, like it's a verbatim transcript, makes it difficult to read. Yes, all those verbal stumblings are there when it's spoken and that's normal, but written down, it really messes with the flow. The brain processes written language differently than spoken language.