fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #6421 ]

[ SECRET POST #6421 ]

⌈ Secret Post #6421 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Should I list my regrets in a letter written to him that I'll never send? Or write him an email and deal with the possibly negative result?

(Original comment thread found here: https://fandomsecrets.dreamwidth.org/3031302.html?thread=1124254214#cmt1124254214)

I didn't catch that thread earlier, but reading it now, everybody is telling you not to contact him. And you're asking again if you should contact him?

It seems less like you want real advice, and more like you want to contact him and are looking for someone to enable you.

What's the response you want to hear that you didn't hear already?

Dude, don't contact him. By all means, write a letter and ABSOLUTELY DO NOT SEND IT or work out your thoughts and feelings in journal form in private, but contacting him after all this time would be selfish on your part and is very likely to backfire on you. You're hurting yourself by holding on to some incredibly flimsy hope that it'll yield results that don't suck. You're not doing it for him, you're doing it because this is taking up way too much real estate in your head and it's not healthy. Please try and channel this into something productive instead.

How would you know exactly how much real estate it's taking up in my head? You don't.

NA

The fact that you've posted multiple times about this is already shows that it takes up way too much real estate in your head. This shouldn't never have been more than a fleeting thought and definitely not something staying with you over multiple days.

Yeah, just go with the letter.

And *reads original thread* maybe work on making your life not "so disappointing."

Sorry to tell you that my life may never change from being disappointing. So get used to it. And please don't be trollish.

Different anon here. Honestly not trying to troll + this isn't to say people should be mean to you, because they shouldn't. But asking the same question twice after it's been unanimously answered, you can start coming off as disingenuous asking for 'advice'.

Was there a reason the unanimous advice given last time was not taken? If we give you the same advice again, will it matter? Asking honestly

Definitely write to them. Pour your high school heart out into your letter as poetically as possible and include a mysterious subject line like "Hey..." to really draw them in. Make sure to mention when they crushed on you so they remember those embarrassing times, and include how you felt about them too now that they're with someone else. And send all of it at once so that the shock value of the wall of text prompts a response. Even better, post it directly to their Facebook/Twitter/social media so they can't pretend they didn't see it. I'm expecting at least 3000 word count from you!

Then post a thread next week with the results, ask FS what to do again, then do the opposite of that.

For legal reasons, this is an unserious answer, but if 10 people telling you 'no' hasn't counted for anything, this was an unserious question.

Maybe you should write a letter, to get it out of your head. But definitely do not send it.

I have anxiety, which means I fixate on a lot of things like this, so I actually understand. Therapy has helped tremendously, but if that is not an option, maybe discuss with someone who might be of help.

Best of luck to you, anon.

What you should do is stop being an obsessive fucking creep and look for a therapist instead.

You want people to enable you. You're not going to listen. No amount of "No don't do X" is going to stop you, because you've decided in your head this is somehow going to fix everything wrong with you somehow. You say it doesn't, but it clearly is a fixation in your head. and instead of taking actual advice, you decide everyone else is "snotty" or "judgmental." So sure, just do it. Pull the fucking trigger.

But don't come crying to us when it doesn't work out because you refused to listen to advice. In fact, when it doesn't, go fuck off and maybe cry in bed alone. Because you haven't listened so far and all you'll find are frustrated people saying, "We told you so." And you'd deserve it.

Going to lock this because I think the question's been answered and it's approaching outright flaming now.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #6421 ]

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