fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #6425 ]

[ SECRET POST #6425 ]

⌈ Secret Post #6425 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Disney's Mulan]

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 09 secrets from Secret Submission Post #918.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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Fuck, that was such a good year. And then everything went to shit. For all of us.

Personally I was on the verge of suicide on 2019 and I'm in a better place RN, but UUUH I agree with this sentiment nonetheless lol
It seemed that people in general were all doing better back then. COVID time was a strange time for me because I could slowly get better mental health wise, but I noticed people getting worse and worse and I actually become aware that I was suffering of depression basically all my life because people were saying they were depressed and I was like DUDE AREN'T YOU ALWAYS LIKE THAT??? LIKE ME??? WHAT? You don't think about killing yourself at least thrice a day? #unreleatable.
Not fun seeing the world suffering like that.

I do think it has gotten better, but it still reek of depression. Nowadays it's less sad-lonely-depression and more angry-frustrated-depression all around me. I find it exhausting.

I'm sorry you were in a bad place back then, but glad you're in a better place now.

It definitely couldn't have been a great year for everyone. Lots of people struggle at all times. But I feel like Covid made everything worse for so many people, and in my social circle things just haven't been the same since. Like, it some ways it's rebounded, but for the most part people are more withdrawn, and I include myself in that. The gatherings we had before lockdown were so big. None since have gotten as large or as unself-consciously joyous.

I totally agree with you, nonny. (also sorry I got maybe too personal)
I notice the IRL withdrawn, too. I had semi-regular meetings with my peers pre-2020 every month, but since then we meet twice a year if we are lucky. I get we are all getting older and have more responsibilities, but these people live 30 minutes maximum from me. Now organizing ever meeting is and endless hassle and everyone is always busy all the time, but if you to discord then you notice that they are not going outside, but instead spending all their week-ends and week-nights online.
Not only that, but when I am in a group of people I notice a lot of them instead of being present and talking to each other, have their eyes glued to their phones. I sometimes feel like a boomer noticing these things because "technology bad" but man, you can go to the internet any single second of your life and the rare occasions you see some of your friends you end up not talking to them because of fucking instagram??? GOD.

And online too it's getting worse and worse OMG tribalism in politics and general wide-spread and almost inescapable toxicity in fandom is really driving me away from the internet. F!S is basically the last place I interact with people online.
IT'S SAD.

Yeah I get you. It's like once people got out of the habit of socializing they just never got back on that social horse. I have friends that used to get together pretty regularly and now I barely see them and I'm the only one trying to fix that. It sucks.

I sometimes wonder if it didn't seem to effect me as much because I never actually stopped my regular schedule. I mean I didn't socialize with my friends and family, but my job never shut down and I never had a quarantine. It actually made longer hours at work for me, but I was still out there doing my job unlike all of my friends that were stuck at home just doing nothing. I think it broke them all in some way. (It broke me in a burn out way, but that's different.)

Not gonna lie, when I realised that fantasising about suicide isn't something that most people do was fucking wild to me. I did it so often when I was younger that it was completely normal to me.

Nah, for me it wasn't. I was trying to get better in 2019 and it went to shit. So for me 2019 was bad and when it got even fucking worse. In some parts better because I am trying still. And I can believe it's been 5 years already.

The thing I personally miss most about 2019 is that I hadn't yet realized that cost of living was an issue that was going to rapidly become the all-devouring monster it is now. Cost of living was still very high in 2019, but suddenly it's 2024 and literally every working-class person I know (myself included) is facing housing insecurity or potential housing insecurity, and is scared, really scared, all the time. And all the other living necessities just keep outpacing inflation, too.

These days, one of my most potent fantasies is earning enough money that if I had to move I could take it in stride, knowing there would be plenty of places within my budget to pick from, and I wouldn't have to worry about tightening my belt in other ways in order to afford it. The sense of security I would feel in that scenario is basically unimaginable to me.

It was objectively a better time for everyone.

Pfft, let's not go down THIS road again.

I would never want to go back to a time before 2022 (and TBH I generally would never go back in time). Most/all of the 2010s were not good times for me.
I honestly feel like pre-2020 so many things/people were running on near empty, so caught up in the go-go-go of life, that we didn't know how bad things were until the world was forced to stop and slow down.

No set-up for steadiness, it's a reason why everything sucks and the world is falling apart.

Add in me hitting rock bottom with my mental health in 2021, I've been looking back at how long my mental health has been in need of help and getting on that path took so much work in 2022, I really do not want to go back to a time where I was feeling really shit. 2019 was a mind numbingly bad year (joke with my best friend all the time that pre-March 2020 we both kept saying that "2020 is going to be MY year!" LMFAO)

I disagree. I’m glad it was good for you, but it wasn’t for everyone.

The bulk of 2019 sucked for me, I was in the middle of a mystery illness and some horrible dental issues, among many changes in my life. Fortunately I got my dental issues fixed and kicked the illness toward the latter part of the year... but then was afflicted with a mystery injury. The only thing that made up for it was that I had the best Christmas ever. So relaxing and peaceful.

I managed to heal the mystery injury going into 2020 but then everything did go to shit.

2019 Trump was president, Hong Kong protesters were getting disappeared, and my favorite game just implemented a truly terrible rules update. It wasn't actually a good year, we just hadn't had Covid yet. And yeah, I really wish I could live in a Non-Covid world but 2019 was still fucking rough.

Dunno. My mom died in 2019, and I went through a major system change at work a few months later. That whole year was a mess I'd rather not relive.

(Strangely, 2024 has been the most manageable year I've had since, uh, 2017.)

2019 is just the GoT finale and Avengers Endgame for me.

oh yes, we can't forget the flaming poo dumpster fire that was the GoT finale. At least I had mixed feelings about Endgame.

I had my 40th birthday party in december 2019. I'm so grateful it wasn't my birthday a few months later. All my friends born in 1970 and 1980 had to cancel their parties. :-(

I was born in '83 and had to give up on mine...

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[ SECRET POST #6425 ]

I really fucking miss 2019

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