I think it is generally weird when people incorporate any real life actor stuff into fandom. For me they are two totally separate things and never the twain shall meet.

On the other hand, I can see how if you make a certain association with a face and you are a visual person then that association could be hard to shake. I guess that's one of the perks of having no visualization, I don't have to worry about associations like that.

Either way, no you are not a monster.