[ SECRET POST #6509 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6509 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 06 secrets from Secret Submission Post #930.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Venting thread- I've been struggling not to hate my husband.

[(Anonymous)]

"Things can start out looking like a fairytale, and love can blind you to someone's faults if you're not careful."

da, but... duh? That holds true for ANY relationship, straight, gay, or otherwise. As a WLW I have plenty of lesbian friends who have ended up in similar situations because they were so blinded by love that they were ignoring obvious red flags. I have a male friend who just got out of an abusive relationship with a female ex but it took me and all of his other friends months to convince him that the relationship was not healthy and that he needed to leave because he loved her and he kept making excuses for her abusive behavior.

It's very, very easy for people to ignore warning signs when they love someone because it's easy to brush it off as not being a big deal. And it's certainly not something that's exclusive to men.

Re: Venting thread- I've been struggling not to hate my husband.

[(Anonymous)]

nayrt, but there is much more social pressure on women to “fix” their partners (regardless of the partner’s gender) than there is on men. Women are supposed to be the nurturing, forgiving, self-effacing ones in the relationship.

Abusive relationships are a different matter. Until she reaches Alex Forrest or Annie Wilkes levels, abusive women are still largely seen as quirky or funny and men who are abused by women are frequently not believed or seen as weak.

Re: Venting thread- I've been struggling not to hate my husband.

[(Anonymous)]

nayrt - This. Women also face a lot more social pressure to tolerate toxic behavior in their male partners, to be peacemakers, to sacrifice for the sake of not rocking the boat. This isn't to say that men never face these pressures. But anyone who thinks that the pressures are the same on both genders is very naive, at best.

This sexism cuts both ways, which also results in marital abuse committed by women not being taken seriously. Guess who's mostly not taking it seriously, though? Other men.

Re: Venting thread- I've been struggling not to hate my husband.

[(Anonymous)]

Talking about a problem that exists in one group isn't the same as claiming that it doesn't exist anywhere else. But it's funny (not in a ha ha way) that every time the issue of men failing to be good partners comes up, someone always pops up to say, "But women do it tooooooooo" and "#notallmen!!!!". Even though nobody said "women never do that!", etc.

Peculiar how predictable that is.