[ SECRET POST #6953 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6953 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 32 secrets from Secret Submission Post #993.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

This is one of the things I love about being ace. No one is attractive on the (hah) face of it for me. It's their personality and connection to others that interests me, so it never matters what they actually look like.

[(Anonymous)]

Ace people can find people attractive.

NAYRT

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, I’ve encountered plenty of people who have very strong aesthetic standards for people who they have no sexual interest in, even hypothetically. (Whether they’re ace or they’re allo and talking about a category of person they’re not sexually attracted to.)

But once you’ve put it separately from being ace, I agree with AYRT that it’s nice to not be too naturally fussed by a person’s physical appearance.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm ace and I find people attractive (or not) all the time and I was shocked to find that some sexual people cannot distinguish between sexual attraction and aesthetic attraction. Like a friend that knows I'm ace was confused when I said I found people attractive, and then we had a whole interesting discussion on the concept of the different types of attraction! Maybe some ace people don't understand the difference (or don't see/feel the difference) so that's where other anon is coming from?

[(Anonymous)]

DA

As someone who is also ace, I'm very picky about attractiveness. I actually had a similar experience as you, where one of my friends thought I was bi when I mentioned being able to find aesthetic appeal in both men and women.
It's a tired cliche, but it really isn't unlike finding an artwork attractive/nice to look at. I don't want to fuck it, but that doesn't mean I don't want to take it home with me.

[(Anonymous)]

I think part of the issue is the word "attractive" which means...you can be attracted to them, and that often has a romantic connotation.

Beautiful or handsome are more purely aesthetic terms. I find many women beautiful but I'm not attracted to them.

Of course people call sofas and shirts attractive. Not beautiful horses or cats, though!

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT

Not sexually; that's kinda the point. And when the general populace talks about attraction they mean sexual attraction.

Being sexually attractive is not the same thing as having an interesting face to look at. Most people I consider interesting to look at (aesthetic attraction) is not what most people consider "hot." "Hot" is almost always boring to me.

[(Anonymous)]

Okay and that's fine, but that's more personal opinion and experience than a "because I'm ace" thing.

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT

I guess shorthand goes right over your head then.

[(Anonymous)]

Heck, I'm NOT ace and I don't understand why personal attraction factors into shipping because I'm not a part of the ship. I don't need to be attracted to the characters, what I need is to believe that they're attracted to EACH OTHER. That's what makes a ship interesting to me. You could put the two hottest people in the world together and if they had zero chemistry, I'd just yawn.

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT

This! I've encountered so many people who don't care about characters they wouldn't date in real life. It's the problem I have with a lot of Hollywood het romances and Thai BL. They're all blandly inoffensive to look at and don't emit any emotions other than maybe some discomfort. Zero chemistry, completely unbelievable as a couple, and boring to watch. I'd rather two "ugly" people who can actually act.

[(Anonymous)]

DA

I mean, there are plenty of people like that right here, judging from some of the secrets of the past couple weeks (including this one, I guess).

[(Anonymous)]

ayrt and exactly, this is why so many mainstream het romances just fall flat for me. The actors may be hot but there's no spark there, nothing that makes me really believe that they're into each other. Give me two unattractive people who have chemistry and I'm all over that.

[(Anonymous)]

THIS