fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1067 ]

[ SECRET POST #1067 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1067 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 13 pages, 325 secrets from Secret Submission Post #153.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 3 - not!secrets ], [ 1 2 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 3 4 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ], [ 1 2 3 - ships it ], [ 1 - would hit it ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

This thread's a top-class example of the way society marginalises and infantilises the mentally ill. Any choices they make are automatically invalidated. A+, guys.

Um. False? Do you honestly think it's a good idea to just stop taking medication? Because, uh...it's not. No one is infantilising anyone. It's common fucking sense.

I don't see where it says the OP came off medication without a doctor's supervision, or anything about their reasons for doing so. In the responses, I see a lot of assumptions and a mob rushing to judgement, with precious little compassion.

Well, I suppose it is f!s.

Again, why would they write about how concerned they are if they already saw a doctor and got approval to stop meds? Also it's the word "stop" that raises a red flag with me. Nobody just stops taking psychiatric medication, you have to gradually wean yourself off of it.

No, any stupid choices they make will be criticized. I mean, it's possible that the OP is doing this under a doctor's supervision, but it's pretty unlikely. Furthermore, as many people have pointed out, there are other people to consider. What happens to the OP if s/he has a psychotic episode? Who will take care of him/her? Do s/he have the money for hospitalization? And what happens if s/he hurts somebody? There are some pretty severe consequences and the OP should be aware of them.

And, just so you know, I'm bi-polar and have had multiple psychotic episodes. I must be marginalizing myself.

"Stupid choices"? You have no way of knowing whether they're supervised or not, and almost nobody has even asked. And what right does a bunch of people on the internet have to assume that OP doesn't know the consequences of their own illness?

Because what the OP writes sounds really fucking familiar to a lot of us out there who have either stopped taking our medication or have at least thought about it?

Most mentally ill people can't grasp the impact their illness has on other people. It's difficult to understand what it's like to be the other person in a relationship like that. If it was easy then nobody would even need therapy. You make it sound like having a mental illness is easy to deal with, and it's not. Yes, some of the people in this thread came off as brash and rude, but most of us are just concerned for the OP and don't want them to hurt themselves and other people. I would rather err on the side of caution than just sit back and say "well, it's their life, they can do what they want."

I didn't initially intend for it to be, but this has turned out to be a smashing social experiment. You are absolutely correct and the majority of the responses here are the reason people with mental illness keep things like going off their medication a secret, even if they are functioning ok. Such as myself.

I don't know what mental illness you have, but people can function without medication temporarily. That doesn't mean you're magically cured, or that you'll never need them again. Are you seeing a doctor? Someone who can advise you, who will recognize if you need to start taking medication again? Did you slowly decrease your dosage, the way you're supposed to, or did you just flush your pills down the toilet?

And, in case you haven't noticed, most of the people commenting are either mentally ill or have experience dealing with someone who is. You're doing something very dangerous, something that could hurt you and the people around you. We're just reminding you of that.

You didn't want to keep it a secret, exactly.

*different anon silently points to the name of the community*

*points to that word 'community' there* It's a com for *sharing* secrets. Why create a picture telling a bunch of people you've gone of your meds and might become psychotic from that if you don't want people to hear and react to the fact?

How extremely arrogant of you to assume that none of us have any experience with mental illness, that none of us are mentally ill ourselves, and that none of us have ever stopped taking psychiatric medication, with or without a doctor's approval.

You know what, I don't even know you. You're right. I shouldn't fucking care, so just do whatever the fuck you want.

I think it's really harsh how people are calling you a selfish arsehole without knowing a lot, lot more. Seriously.

Sometimes all you have is your sense of identity, and that can be worth more than anything else.

Being on meds is an uneasy thing for many, and I'm not surprised that many of those who have made that often sacrificial choice to take them condemn those who haven't.

My personal experience is that meds have been better for me and others, and those around them, than not, but I understand when individual people choose not to, for whatever reason that they have the right to make. (Provided they're not being involuntarily admitted, etc. and even then I've seen the abuses in that system.)

I have a physical disability, and you should see the condemnation when I do something that impairs myself further, by "indulging" myself. How selfish and thoughtless of me, OMG! If I took it to an extreme, then yes, but just as with your secret, most people don't know enough to condemn me; they think they have the moral highground automatically - what's certain is that the kneejerk response is to infantilise the "recalcitrant" person.

Also, to be fanwanky :) :) I would say that the Doctor could find a better treatment for you than the meds on present day Earth could provide. *sighhhh* Maybe a really good mind meld would help. But at any rate I'm sure he'd be happy to rob an ATM and help you buy up a chemist. :) Peace.

For the record, I never called OP "selfish" or any kind of pejorative. I was only criticizing their decision to stop taking the meds, criticizing behavior isn't the same as making judgments of one's character.

I'm sorry that people have been judgmental towards you, but mental illnesses are not the same as physical disabilities.

1) A person who physically disabled is probably in control of their mental faculties. A mentally ill person may not be. I'm not saying this in an attempt to infantalize the OP: that's just how it is. If you're mentally ill you have to accept that you're not always perceptions of the world might not be accurate, and that your ability to make decision could be impaired.

2) An unmedicated mentally person can be dangerous, to themselves and others. Not only could they do violent harm without realizing it, just being insane can take an extreme emotional toll. Let's say the OP cuts their meds and becomes so depressed they can't get out of bed. How will that effect their family and friends? Who will take care of them if that happens?

Beyond that, mentally ill people are really unpleasant. When I went off my meds, I lost most of my friends because no one wanted to put up with my bullshit. Does the OP really want to alienate everyone they care about?

3) The OP mentioned there's a chance that they might become psychotic. So we're not just dealing with social anxiety, or depression; this person might lose all touch with reality and do God knows what. When I had a psychotic episode I saw dogs that weren't there, hallucinated body parts in my food and heard people whispering all the time. I thought these things were real, that this was how the world worked. This was not a celebration of my individuality and autonomy. This was me nearly destroying my life.

4) Did you know that the University of Pennsylvania is actually conducting a study on why bipolar patients stop taking their meds? They aren't doing it because those patients become happy, well-adjusted members of society. It's because those people have higher rates of suicide and hospitalization than bipolar patients who continue treatment.

Sorry to rant, but as someone who has been where the OP is, I really do feel strongly that they're making a terrible decision and really hope that this will make them rethink it. Sadly, that doesn't look like it's going to happen.

Amen to this lovely, thoughtful comment. I'm interested to hear what that study comes up with, too.

So they keep it a secret because if they were to proceed to tell people, in very general and vague terms, that they stopped taking their medications, everyone would tell them to start again?

I don't think anyone would have told you to start taking your meds again if you had been very clear on how informed -- and thoroughly-counselled -- a decision that decision was. Can certain people function without meds? Sure, of course. But do you know how many people who can't function without them decide they can anyhow? The numbers are scary. In fact, the more mentally disturbed you are, the less likely you are to take your meds, and the more likely you are to need them. So if everyone on here had two ways to interpret your secret -- a) stable and proud of it, or b) very *unstable* and proud of it -- which one do you think would be the best side to err on? How much did it really hurt you to have 20 individuals tell you to start taking your medication again?

This isn't a social experiment. This was a lot of people who -- bluntly, and often cruelly -- are laying out the facts. If you stopped taking your medication without talking to someone, you are either crazy or an idiot. Either way, take your meds.

WOW BECAUSE I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT MENTAL ILLNESSES, NOT HAVING ONE FOR 22 YEARS OR ANYTHING.

ALSO, I TOTALLY DIDN'T DIDN'T HAVE A MENTAL BREAKDOWN TWO WEEKS AGO.

In conclusion: FUCK YOU.

any choice =/= a very ill-advised choice

I'll bet the responses have less to do with infantalizing the mentally ill than they do bad personal experiences that start with a friend/family member going off their medication for what sound like responsible reasons.

I respect a person has more knowledge of their illness than someone else (especiall some stranger on the internet) but going off your medication on your own causing problems isn't exactly a rare scenario with mental disorders.

LOL, I'm speaking from personal experience. I'm guessing you're trolling since most of the people in this thread are either mentally ill themselves, or sound like they've had friends and family who are mentally ill.

Hi. I'm one of the other anons in this thread. I'm mentally ill myself, though in a different way from the OP, and have known other people who are.

I also agree with the person you're replying to. People can disagree with you without being trolls. Your own experiences have obviously been painful, and I'm sorry for that, but you still don't automatically know any more about the OP's personal situation than the rest of up.

*rest of us.

There's disagreeing and then there's accusing others of being patronizing assholes.

yet another anon

(Anonymous) - 2009-12-08 22:26 (UTC) - Expand

Re: yet another anon

(Anonymous) - 2009-12-08 23:03 (UTC) - Expand

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

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