[ SECRET POST #1250 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1250 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 24 pages, 622 secrets from Secret Submission Post #179.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom.livejournal.com]

130. http://i50.tinypic.com/zuguok.png

[(Anonymous)]

Well, my experience so far has been completely different.

[dar-actually.livejournal.com]

*spit-take* You are kidding, right?

OP

[(Anonymous)]

No. What other people below said. If a guy says he likes James Bond, people assume that he likes it for the action and cool gadgets and all. If a girl says the same thing, people assume it's because she thinks James Bond is hot.

Usually.

Re: OP

[dar-actually.livejournal.com]

When you put it like that, I can understand it. Thing is, when you put it like that, you're talking about a fandom, not exactly an individual person. When you say "I like James Bond", people take it as you're saying "I like the universe of James Bond." And I agree it is a double-standard to imply a woman is only into any fandom for the sexy men.

But, there is simply no way for a straight man to talk about other men he admires in real life around other men without having his sexuality called into question. Hell, I've admitted my man-crushes on here before, and got the kind of frank openness and perspicacity you'd expect from anonymous folk on the internet. That is to say, "lol, fag". Which, when you consider that most people on here are women anyway, is pretty sad.

[(Anonymous)]

Sounds like you just chat with jerks who think they're funnier than they are, OP.

[misterthursday.livejournal.com]

Yeah, clearly you've never been a male in the north east of england.

If you're conversation isn't limited to tits, you're clearly a poof.

Hell, you even get ribbed by your close mates if you compliment a dude.

Not saying it doesn't suck for you, but yeah, no-one really get's it any better.

[pellimusprime.livejournal.com]

Or they're just teasing you. |v

[(Anonymous)]

Do you live in bizarro universe?

[(Anonymous)]

I agree, but would change the pronouns a bit. Straight guys definitely get teased if they ever say anything positive about another man (where do you think that stupid "no homo" shit came from?). Straight women on the other hand can gush about how hot another girl is without anyone questioning their sexuality. And gay men are known for non-sexually idolizing women.

[ladyairy.livejournal.com]

I considered anon-ing this but you know what, why bother. Fucking word. In my area it's gotten to the point where it feels like there's a cultural assumption that men are more desirable than women: if a man has even one homosexual experience he enjoyed, he's automatically gay; if a woman is in the same position, she's "experimenting".

Likewise, if a man has one heterosexual experience he enjoyed, he could be lying or deeply closeted! but if a woman has one heterosexual experience she enjoyed everyone defaults to assuming she's straight.

tl;dr: double standards piss me off

[(Anonymous)]

I wonder if this has something to do with our (literally) phallocentric view of sex. Lesbians are routinely told that we can't have "real" sex because there isn't a penis involved. So if penis = sex, then any sex act involving a penis must be more authentic than one without. Therefore if you fuck someone with a dick, it means more because cock > pussy.

[knuddeluff.livejournal.com]

Huh, never thought of it that way.

Not that this isn't 100% true, but...

[snapcakes.livejournal.com]

{I wonder if this has something to do with our (literally) phallocentric view of sex.}

You wonder? Plz. You know you're right on the goddamn money.

[soymade.livejournal.com]

IA

[(Anonymous)]

...surely that only happens when you're talking to assholes.

[(Anonymous)]

Where I live, if a guy said they thought RDJ was hot, they might end up taking a bit more than ribbing.

[viceindustrious.livejournal.com]

I know everyone else has been disagreeing, but I think I know where you're coming from, OP.

Sure, guys don't get away with saying 'oh he's so dreamy' or 'he looks great' or whatever, but I've seen what you're talking about in fannish conversations about how awesome Iron Man is or isn't James Bond badass etc.

[ember-reignited.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think a lot of the people above misunderstood the secret. :/

Also:

anon lives in a heteronormative society

Correct.

and should just suck it up

Incorrect.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, I meant this. Thanks.

I realize it's a wholly different matter and the opposite effect when it comes to specifically complimenting someone's looks.

[ladytinyhelm.livejournal.com]

I think you need a better class of friends. Because people deciding that your clearly-stated preference for women is invalid if you decide that an actor-type is mildly nifty is complete and utter rude bullshit. I can only hope that they're in high school or something so that they have time to grow out of it.

Either way, regarding them...

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, that does suck. Sorry, OP.

[soymade.livejournal.com]

Pretty much this. Those people are jerks.

[xenafox.livejournal.com]

Mm, that would piss me off too.