case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2010-06-19 05:06 pm

[ SECRET POST #1264 ]


⌈ Secret Post #1264 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 27 pages, 651 secrets from Secret Submission Post #181.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 - not!secrets ], [ 1 2 3 4 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 3 4 5 - too big ], [ 1 2 3 4 5 - repeat ], [ 1 - doing it wrong ], [ 1 - take it to comments ], [ 1 - ships it ], [ 1 2 3 - posted twice ], [ 1 - personal attack ], [ 1 - empty comment ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

(Anonymous) 2010-06-20 06:50 am (UTC)(link)
original anon.

Even public universities do not consider you an independent adult for undergraduate, so I would not have gotten a cent of aide or subsidized gov't loans. And yes, I also think it's tacky and cruel to live a comfortable lifestyle and not help out a child who is working their way into the world in a productive and mature fashion. I would have cut contact with my father if he decided I was an "adult" at 18 and therefore I should saddle myself with private loan debt (if I could even get it without a cosigner) to go to school. The only message I can take from "I make nearly a million a year but won't help you through college" is "I don't really love you." I did choose to go to public university rather than private out of respect for the fact that I was spending someone else's money, but the fact remains that yes, I think you have an obligation to help your kids through college to the best of your abilities. When you're rich, that means paying for it. If you're poor, that means letting the child live at home rent free while going to community college.

Family and the success of your kids are more important than money, and they're certainly more important than a fifth car. My grandparents recently helped my 50-year-old uncle hold onto his house after his construction business fell on hard times, and they paid for his son to go to college. That's what a loving family does when it's within their means; money is a lot more fulfilling when it's improving the lives of those you love. My mom isn't doing so well financially and I fully intend to help her out in the future. I would never say she's 70 now, which is older than 18, so I have no "obligation" to help her.

Frankly your attitude saddens me a lot. I'm glad it's totally foreign to my family.

(Anonymous) 2010-06-21 11:57 pm (UTC)(link)
By being the giver, I understand this fully.

As the taker though, I found your attitude downright disheartening.