fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1273 ]

[ SECRET POST #1273 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1273 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

THIS ANON, I LIKE YOU.

Secrets Left to Post: 16 pages, 391 secrets from Secret Submission Post #182.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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129. http://i50.tinypic.com/2we9bmv.png

Sorry, OP. Maybe you don't have to let go your fandom fixation but find a way to work with it. Get a job in a comic shop, or as event staff? Go to conventions and network?

THIS. Maybe cons might be the way to go for this person. Volunteering at some maybe? Plenty of older fans there and a good way to turn online fandom into some real social connections.

(no subject)

rathanylakan.livejournal.com - 2010-06-28 23:35 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2010-06-29 00:24 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

rathanylakan.livejournal.com - 2010-06-29 00:28 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2010-06-29 01:02 (UTC) - Expand

I agree.

Also love the secret image. Good luck to you, OP.

(no subject)

vardoeger.livejournal.com - 2010-06-28 22:41 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

aeonamber.livejournal.com - 2010-06-28 22:43 (UTC) - Expand

Oy, this could so be me :/
I hope you find your way to something that makes you happy and keeps you that way, OP.

To some extent, this could be me as well. It's more complex (I did go to college for a time, am starting up again, things like that...), but still similar.

I did do what others are suggesting to the OP, though. I went/go to cons and when I lived in Fresno I met up with a group of Firefly fans in person and made some good friends that way. Maybe anon could do that?

Best of luck to the OP, and the rest of us who can tend to feel the same.

That's actually a pretty smart illustration.

You can't include fandom experience on a resume, no, but... it's not a null accomplishment.

Yeah, I liked the illustration, too.

But while you can't include fandom experience on a resume, you can use the skills you acquired there to pad it.

(no subject)

ferricent.livejournal.com - 2010-06-28 23:42 (UTC) - Expand

So sorry to hear that, it got out of your hands. But there are many people working on music, comic books, tv, etc related jobs because that is what they like, have you ever consider it? go out to other city if you can't do nothing where you are, whatever, no one would ever help you out with that but you, and hey, you perfectly know it's time to do something.

I am the same way Anon, but now I am finally trying to let go and do something that combines my love of fandom and go to college, and hope to get a job in it. Only now I am disappointed that I didn't try sooner.

It's never too late to get started, OP. You have a means to support yourself, which helps a lot; you're not tied to a job you don't like forever, but you have a leg to stand on for now. Is there a family member you can talk to for help or motivation? Is there a community college or online college where you can take night classes? Take something that interests you, or a skill you always wanted to have--maybe you'll find something you really want to do with life. If you don't want to start with college classes, teach yourself something with books from the library. I found a therapist really, really helpful for getting me motivated and helping me plan a new career track--if you're interested, take a look into someone practicing cognitive-behavioral therapy. And good luck, OP. Just remember you never have to give up fandom, just scale it back to make room for other things (or, as others said, get a fandom-related job!).

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2010-06-28 22:54 (UTC) - Expand

You're not alone and sometimes I feel the same way. You might be surprised to find how many people in their mid and late 20s feel unaccomplished. Practically every person I know in that age range and have met feels like they've wasted their time. Whether it's going to college and majoring in a field they're no longer interested in perusing or regretting not going in the first place or hating their career choice. It's important to remember that in your 20s and 30s you're still relatively young and it's not too late. :)

You don't have to let it go, but find something that makes you as excited in real life as fan fics do and leave them as a hobbie or something like that. I see 'delusions of being an author' in the illustration, so how about something related to writing like... Journalism, I'm pretty sure you'll find something you enjoy to write about just like you enjoy writing fics.

Good luck OP, it's never too late to change things you know. :)

Hey, at least you have a job and are supporting yourself, right? That's step one. And you know you want something else out of life, yeah? That's step two. You're doing great so far. Just take another step. You'll be fine. :)

...That illustration breaks my heart. )':

Well.

If you hadn't held on, you'd be dead.

This illustration is amazingly descriptive. I ttly empathise, too. :( It's really easy to lose touch with the things that used to make you feel grounded in life, especially if you are an introverted twentysomething trying to find your niche in the economy from hell and not always feeling excited about looking for it. I think it's better to be doing something with your real life - anything, even if you have to make yourself do social things irl or sign up for a course on something - than nothing, but it's hard to know where to start.

Do you know any other people in your fandoms who live in your area? Are there any fandom events, meetups or cons that happen nearby? That's not a bad place to start reconnecting with your roots.

Get a life OP, and I don't mean that in a nasty way. I mean seriously leave your house and meet people and get a life. It's not easy but it's good for you. You like fandom? Then hang out with fans in RL. Unless you're really isolated you should be able to find something. A local Meetup, a club...something. I met all my current friends through fandom and while I'm still struggling with some aspects of my life, I wouldn't give up fandom for anything.

You are probably smart enough for college. How did you do in school? There are so many different colleges out there, OP. If you have something that you're passionate about, maybe you can make it into a career.

Going back to school was the smartest thing I ever did. It might benefit you as well.

You make an illustration like that and you think you're not smart enough for college?

::shakes her head at your foolishness::

I think people are giving you a lot of good advice. I hope the ideas they have are motivating to you, rather than just tiring to consider. But if you really want to make a change, sometimes it's worth putting in that effort when you don't really want to, or meeting new people IRL when it's so awkward. Because later it will make you a happier person.

Look for motivation first. I'm sure you have many role models for determination. Try Courage Wolf :P And just remember that you, even if it doesn't seem like it, can chip away at your problems. You can change your own life. And (in case you're extremely oversensitive, like me) that isn't any kind of criticism about where you are currently; quite the opposite. It's a very novel and strange idea, that you may actually be able to do something you don't want to do and thereby accomplish something you never really thought you could.

Ah well, I have no idea if any of this applies to you. Good luck, and best wishes.

THOSE FUCKERS

OUR SHIT

On the plus side, you have a job. Therefore, you have money and stability. They're a big help.

You could try making some social prospects. Look up a beginner class for something that sounds like it might be fun or useful. Even if it leads to nothing, you might make a friend or two.

Alternately, try the convention thing, if only for the experience. Depending on how you feel, it could be a great place to meet people in the same situation. Or a complete disaster, but at least you'll survive it and know better next time.

That works for a lot of things, actually. If nothing else, you've learned something about yourself. Take a few minor risks and make some stupid but not crucial mistakes. That's what this time is for, apparently.

Just work on building one layer a little bit at a time, because that's how it eroded away. It's not going to magically reappear, but it can be built up again.

(I'm trying to take this advice.)

I am in pretty much the same situation as you (with a few other caveats keeping me hanging on), except that I don't regret it. Fandom is important to me—I don't see the harm in that. And if even one of my fanfics touches someone, then I consider that an accomplishment. Not everyone does big, world-changing things. Most people don't, actually. But that doesn't mean that you haven't done anything.

It's only a long drop and a quick stop if you let go.

...I find it depressing how much I can relate to this secret :( it really sucks, OP *hugs*

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