fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1585 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1585 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[Shoujo Kakumei Utena]

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03.

[Pirates of the Caribbean]

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04.

[Zak McKracken and the Alien Mindbenders, Loom]

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05.

[Westminster Bagcarrier]

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06.

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07. [repeat]

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08.

[Eek! The Cat, Garfield]

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09.

[Gintama]

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10.

[Sassy Gay Friend]

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11.

[Doctor Who]

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12.

[florence and the machine]

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13.

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14.

[Inception]

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15.

[fakenews_fanfic]

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16.

[Ace Attorney]

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17.

[alex o'loughlin/the invisible]

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18.

[G.A.B.E.]

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19.

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20.

[The Black Cauldron]

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21.

[Pokemon]

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22.

[Girls Next Door by Pika-la-Cynique]

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23.

[Cuanta Vida]

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24.

[John Lennon]

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25.

[Tangled/The Enchanted Forest Chronicles]

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26.

[Inception]

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27.

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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

28. [SPOILERS for Puella Magi Madoka Magica]

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29. [SPOILERS for Homestuck]

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30. [SPOILERS for Super]

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31. [repeat]

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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

32. [TRIGGER WARNING for rape]

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33. [TRIGGER WARNING for suicide]

[Doctor Who]

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34. [TRIGGER WARNING for self-harm]

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35. [TRIGGER WARNING for rape, abuse]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #226.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 2 3 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 0 - hit/ship/spiration ], [ 0 - repeats ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

34.
http://i55.tinypic.com/vl4m1.jpg

OP, if you feel you're completely fine with your cutting, why are you telling us you want to be someone else and that you think you're flawed and self-centered? To me, you sound like you have a very low self esteem. You do deserve fixing - why wouldn't you deserve it? There isn't a lack of oxygen on this planet - everyone should live for as long as possible and be as happy as possible. Everyone deserves to be happy and if you are not happy cutting then you are not happy.

Because you sound very low. I advise you seek help. I would offer you links, but any I'm involved with would be UK based. I'm sure Samaritans would help you and, on the off chance you are living in the UK, please see your GP.

I reckon the OP believes that the physical harm caused by cutting is negligible, but there's a lot of pressure against it. The way I read the secret is that OP is okay with it but others think that the cutting is a sign of being flawed/self-centered.

It's an addictive thing though, what with the endorphin release involved and all.

I could be wrong though.

That's not how I read the secret at all.

I understand that many people cut and decide it is not problem for them, but this person seems to have deemed it a problem herself by telling us (incorrectly) that he/she is so worthless.

The fact that he/she is making a secret about it really speaks volumes. I hope they manage to find help soon.

the fact that you posted this secret and are looking for a reason to fix this behaviour is a good first step. it means that on some level, you do want to change. but, as someone who struggled with self-harm for a very long time, i want to say: please, please, please get some help, anon. even if you don't think your problems are serious now. sometimes the thing that wakes you up and makes you see how serious your problems really are, is something that just as easily could have killed you.

That you posted this as a secret alone says volumes about the fact that at least on some level, you really don't think you are fine after all.

MTE. Seek help OP. You could end up really hurting yourself one day if you don't.

I won't lie and say I do this too. I don't. But I know the feeling. I want so much to tell you I know what you're going through, and show you something that will actually help. But again, honest: I don't.

This inspired me to want to write something that you could relate to. Not necessarily in a way that needs helping either, since I'm not sure that's what you're looking for. I just want you to know that you're not alone. :-/ I honestly don't know what else to say.

So I had that habit, which a lot of people do. It's hard at the time to see anything wrong with it, and in fact I still don't always see what the big deal was. I have a big weakness for self-destructive characters still.

But I wish every day I hadn't had that habit, because as a professional woman I have to spend a lot of money and time on expensive concealer for my arms every day, and even then I tend to favor long sleeves. The scars fade a lot, but not completely. Among other less vain reasons, of course.

Get help as soon as you can. It's almost certain your circumstances will change. You need to allow for the possibility of you feeling a different way someday. Sympathize with a future self, who can't go back in time to help you now.

Ach, yes, the scars can be embarrassing and inconvenient since people tend to stare/ask about them. Like I said above, the social stigma involved can really seem worse than the cutting itself. It sucks that you have to bother with the concealer to cover it up.

Right now I'm saving up for a big sleeve-ish sort of tattoo to cover mine. Fortunately I ended up in a field where that type of thing is acceptable.

I feel like, depending on the person and the severity of the cutting, the social stigma can be much worse and much more damaging.

It's not a culturally accepted behavior but, as someone who did cut as a teenager and is now fairly educated about and experienced with using physical stress/pain to bring about altered states, I have a hard time understanding why it always has to be condemned. It's not as safe a method as, say, running to get the same rush and emotional purge but if a person isn't in danger of putting themselves in the hospital and isn't feeling any socially conditioned shame about it...

Go get help. YOU ARE NOT FINE. Everyone has flaws, but they, and you, also have things that are intrinsically good about them.
I don't know how to impress upon you how much you are worth helping, but if I can say I'd still encourage you to see someone and persuade you that you are worth helping even if you had killed someone (and I'm certain whatever you've done isn't nearly as bad as that), maybe it'll work.
Even if you can't bring yourself to see that you are a wonderful person and worth helping, at least tell someone about your problem as a favour to me.

[ SECRET POST #1585 ]

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You Aren't Alone

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