fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1650 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1650 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Where do you live? I've grown up in KS and it's surrounded with liberals, it's not a wholly red state as most believe.

I don't want to speak of politics all through this thread but that's what I've seen from my viewpoint. It appears you think otherwise.

I live in California.

Look, I was kind of rude in my previous comment and I apologize. I'll be honest, you are so incredibly privileged as a Christian in the United States that you're blind to it. I'll give you a little tiny example. Let's say it's late November and you're talking to an acquaintance. Maybe someone you like, but don't know too well. How easy is it to ask, purely out of good intentions, just to make a little conversation "hey, what are you doing for Christmas this year?".

If that person you're talking to is like me, there's that little moment when you have to make a decision on how to respond that that. Do I just say "not much" and change the subject? Do I say "nothing, because I don't celebrate Christmas"? Is this person the type that's going to let it go with a shrug, or are they going to start in with the personal questions about why? I have had people actually tell me I should celebrate Christmas, because it's a secular and not a religious holiday, REALLY.

This is such a little tiny thing, but it's an example of a thousand little things non-Christians experience in a majority Christian country. Unless you're wearing clothes that explicitly show that you're a member of another religion (ie, a hijab), everyone assumes that you're Christian. In a lot of situations, it's easier to not make a fuss and point out that you're not, and when you do say "well, no, I didn't go to church this Easter, because I'm not a Christian", there's a pretty good chance the questioner is not going to let it lie, and will start asking intrusive questions.

Overall, it's not a huge deal in my life, but it's needling, every time it happens, a reminder that I am not like everyone else, my beliefs are weird, the majority of this country has a connection that I cannot share. And it's really hurtful when politicians say things like being of my beliefs cannot be real Americans (thanks, George HW Bush) and when you read a poll that says that your minority group is the least trusted in the entire country.

So I'm sorry I was rude, but the idea that Christians are marginalized is bizarre beyond belief.

Well I say that because of my experiences. In my family I'm considered the 'black sheep' because I'm not liberal and the like. So I've had to deal with the opposite of what others have from their family. So I understand.

I don't assume most people are Christian or even Republican (conservative/liberal is different, I think since they can exist in both parties) because it's been obvious since I've hit high school that's not the case. I don't see myself as privileged at all.

If someone said they didn't celebrate Christmas I'd ask why because I'd be curious. I don't care if people celebrate Christmas or not. For me, even if it's not about Christ (for some people I know it's not) then it's about family and friends.

So if you said 'I don't because of 'x'' I'd say 'oh, that's cool.' I think it's rather silly for someone to tell you you need/should celebrate something.

And it's okay, I accept your apology. I was just speaking from my own experiences. I can understand the needling feeling. It happens no matter where you are because we don't all believe the same thing.

If someone said they didn't celebrate Christmas I'd ask why because I'd be curious.

I understand, but you must understand that this gets tiresome to those of us who go through this questioning process constantly. That is what it is to be part of a marginalized group - you're constantly being questioned on why you're not part of the mainstream.

Upon reading some of your other responses, I'm not sure what you know what other people mean by marginalization. Some guy in Kansas - a majority Christian state - saying that Christians are dicks isn't marginalizing Christians. One person can't do that. It takes a whole society to marginalize minority groups. I get that you were offended, but you weren't marginalized.

OTOH, I am marginalized when I know that despite any other qualifications I might have, I would have a tough time running for elected office because I am not a Christian. There is one person in federal elected office who openly shares my beliefs.

If you live in the United States and are a Christian, you are privileged over all other religious groups, period. Your complaints that someone was mean to you do not compare to the society-wide exclusion that the minority religious groups experience.

I'm assuming you're Muslim or something like that since you've said your beliefs aren't well liked in America? If so, why not take it as an opportunity to show why you believe what you believe and don't see it as a constant attack?

I know the reasoning why if that's true but there's always a chance to create a better understanding of something that doesn't get a lot of good press. For example I'm part of the gothic culture. A lot of Christians don't understand it. I get a lot of questions and am told what I'm doing is not Christian. But whenever I'm asked questions I try to help them understand that it's really okay.

It's not the same as religion, I know, but I know a bit about what you go through.

I didn't mean to say marginalized in the comments above. Sorry for that.

And no, it's not just about someone is being mean to me that prompted my responses. It's the fact that if I say I'm Christian I get a lot of bad looks and this is in a supposedly red state. There are more smaller religous groups than Christians that I've encountered. Such as Buddism, Muslim, wiccan and others.

I'm actually not Muslim. I'm an atheist.

I'm sorry - eh, wait, what am I saying, I'm not sorry you occasionally get people questioning your motives. I'm glad, because maybe it will help you be a little understanding of what it's like to be a minority.

I see.

I don't understand your sarcasm because I just said that I know what you feel like, even if it's not on the same level.

I'm not being sarcastic.

Ok.

You could also be a Wiccan, a non-Wiccan pagan, a Muslim, a Hindu, or just about any nonChristian to have made the above statement and still be talking about the same country. Christianity can't be marginalized when it pervades just about every aspect of our lives.

This. Thank you. So much of this. Growing up in a small conservative Midwestern town and being an atheist was basically hell, particularly at Christmas. Somewhere I still have a little card someone handed to me at my library job asking, "If Santa's naughty or nice list was God's list of who went to hell and who went to heaven, which list would you be on? Come to Jesus, and celebrate the true reason behind Christmas!" I also had small children ask me what church I went to; when I told them I didn't go to church, they'd give me a horrified look and tell me I was going to hell. These kids were maybe seven or eight, tops. And they were already convinced that everyone but them and their congregation were going to hell.

I could go on forever, but you already know. So thank you, anyway, for saying exactly what I was thinking and feeling.

[ SECRET POST #1650 ]

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