fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1680 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1680 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I don't know if the best way to get over someone is to jump to another person. I'm guilty of it myself so augh. I know you're SUPPOSED to grieve and start fresh, but gah. Gah. "Gah" all around. I feel you, I do.

Think of it like deep cleaning your cabinets or something. You have to tear everything down and mess it all up before you can reorganize it all and place everything where you want it. It's harder to destroy what you had already but it's safer than hiding the old items (or in this case, feelings) by covering them with something new. Because hiding them means they may show back up later. :/ Easier to pull them down and discard them, even if it's hard to part with them.

Also pah, are you me? Seriously. Ouch.

It's not fair to me or another partner for me to date someone else as a way to get over her, but part of me thinks it'd work. If I could refocus on someone local and begin to redirect my feelings, even if that relationshipd din't ultimately work, I think it'd do a lot toward helping me get over her. Its like, at the point where I go to the store & look at things nad think ''she'd like that'' & wnat to buy it for her as a present or something. I've stopped doing it [not that I ever did it a whole lot before], but having someone else to think about & buy those things for instead would help. It's dumb, but it's the only soluation I can think of, and maybe it'd work, evne if it's not fair. Of course, although I've dated a litlte since her, nothing has remotely panned out. I don't know if it's beause of my feelings for her already are so strong & maybe the othe rperson can sense it or just bad luck. Of course youre right I could date someone & think I'm over her and then old habits come back. I sometimes worry I'll be that creepy person still in love with someone from 20 years ago. She's that kind of girl. Part of me thinks I'll get over her, eventually, but always love her. Its like... unless she fucks up royally somehow, how can I not?

I just dont know. part of me wants to just have her confirm that never in a million years would she ever date me & to stop thinking about it, there are too many idfferences and obstacles & she's not willing to try because then I could relaly get the NO HOPE ITS OVER thru my head but the other half doesn't want to bring it up for the slim, reidiculous hope that maybe, just somehow, if I don't push it or force it and it gets enough time to grow and nuture on its own, she'll be willing to give it a try. It's just like... probably two years from now, if ever &... god I want to be like, two years into a relationship form now you know, not just starting one... I'm too old for this bullshit. :( She's worth waiting for, to be sure, I just... wish things were recirocal.

Well, mine told me in every way she could that it would never happen in the history of ever and I still have feelings regardless. It's better though, because I've told her and I understand that she doesn't feel mad at me or view me as a monster or something. Knowing she doesn't hate me for it is a lot of comfort. It'll never be what I wanted but hey, you know, what I wanted in the first place was a close friend and I already mastered that. n_n So I'm trying to look at it that way.

Like, I don't know if I'll ever stop feeling like I do towards her but talking to her about it made me feel much better. Just knowing my feelings were heard and taken for what they were and not thrown back at me with anger. I mean it's not like she'd WISH for this to be happening to me.

Try to ease yourself down from that hope, hun. A no is a no. Remind yourself that. You're high in the clouds right now and your fall is going to hurt more and more the longer you fly upwards. :/ Cushion yourself with what comfort you can.

[ SECRET POST #1680 ]

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