case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2011-10-23 03:44 pm

[ SECRET POST #1755 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1755 ⌋


Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 09 pages, 206 secrets from Secret Submission Post #251.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 1 2 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeats ]
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments and concerns should go here.

[identity profile] saturnonjupiter.livejournal.com 2011-10-23 10:30 pm (UTC)(link)
With regards to porn, many would argue it does harm others by messing with your sense of adult sexuality/proper sexual interaction with others.

Plus just look at Jersey Shore every time one of those blockheads has sex there's another cryfest the next morning. Clearly it makes everyone on your block's hangover worse by enducing shrieking sobs of remorse and confusion.

tl;dr sex kills kittens don't have it!!!!!!!

(Anonymous) 2011-10-23 11:14 pm (UTC)(link)
For one thing, "proper sexual interaction with others" is going to be different for everyone. As long as no one is being raped, there is no imminent risk of death or serious injury, all people involved are of age and sound mind to give informed consent to sex, and are enjoying themselves, there is nothing that can be called "improper."

And many also argue that porn is a healthy outlet for sexual people with a high libido who don't have the opportunity to have sex. And that sexual frustration and the inability to relieve sexual tension leads to anxiety, mood swings, and even cycles of depression (especially in women; it was called "female hysteria" in the mid-19th century, and treatment, no joke, involved a doctor fingering the patient until she orgasmed).

What I think you need to realize that your experience is not everyone else's. Not having sex or even masturbating works fine for you. It works fine for me, too. For others, take away their right to have sex without a wedding first, or their ability to jack off when they can't find a sexual partner, and they will be utterly miserable.

And judging all extramarital sexual encounters by Jersey Shore immediately invalidates your argument. Sorry.

[identity profile] saturnonjupiter.livejournal.com 2011-10-23 11:21 pm (UTC)(link)
oh sorry I figured the 'sex kills kittens' part would've clued you in I was being a bit silly there, thinking JS is any sort of decent standard to judge by. obviously those people are on the extreme of 'this is why you should wait to have sex or you wind up on tv looking like a fool'.

welp I think that's their own problem if they have such 'high libido'. frankly I feel that's more of a mental thing in their own head where they believe they need sex, whether from another person or their own hand/whatever as opposed to any decent sort of grounding.

idk I think you can get mentally/emotionally messed up from sex as well esp. if you're just not ready to take it seriously/properly so even if there's no physical effects of the negative sort it can still be damaging.

(Anonymous) 2011-10-23 11:41 pm (UTC)(link)
No, it really isn't. In people with high libido, regardless of their sexual preference, there is some very real hormone and brain chemistry at work. The hormones that control sexual urges and arousal are produced by the adrenal glands, which also control fight-or-flight response. Being horny and not being allowed to do anything about it causes a chemical imbalance, which leads to anxiety and even depression.

And even if it was only in their heads, how exactly would you propose "fixing" that? Doping sexually frustrated people up on unnecessary antidepressants and unnecessary therapy so they feel shameful and defective about wanting to masturbate (you know, like we were doing in the 1920s)? Because that's totally not going to mess anyone up at all, right?

Having sex before you're ready to will definitely mess you up, but it's not the sex that's to blame. It's the person giving into pressure to do something they know they aren't ready for.

[identity profile] curseangel.livejournal.com 2011-10-23 11:44 pm (UTC)(link)
+1

Said it better than I did. <3

[identity profile] curseangel.livejournal.com 2011-10-23 11:43 pm (UTC)(link)
Having a high or low libido is down to genetics. It's not just a mental thing. And wtf "as opposed to any decent sort of grounding" what does this even mean.

And there is nothing wrong with casual sex. You don't have to take sex seriously, isn't that great? I mean, be responsible, use protection, obviously, but it doesn't have to be all "only with your true love" etc. And it especially doesn't have to only be with someone you're married to. That is so much bullshit. Having casual sex or sex outside of marriage =/= "mentally/emotionally damaging."

(Anonymous) 2011-10-24 12:02 am (UTC)(link)
i'll give you full marks for the rest of this comment chain, tho

very convincingly argued, you really make me feel like i'm reading the delusional slutshaming word vomit of a bible thumping dumbshit

so props to you

(Anonymous) 2011-10-24 03:07 am (UTC)(link)
Okay, I was kind of enjoying reading this conversation, and didn't feel the need to chime in, but...saying someone's high libido is "only in their head"?

ftr I don't have that problem, and I've also made the personal choice to save sex until marriage. But I find that statement to have about as much merit as saying that depression (which I HAVE suffered from) is "only in your mind" and just. no.

[identity profile] veronica-rich.livejournal.com 2011-10-24 05:09 am (UTC)(link)
many would argue it does harm others by messing with your sense of adult sexuality/proper sexual interaction with others

That's why we try to make it illegal for 12-year-olds to view porn. It's sort of insulting to imply though, that a 39-year-old isn't possessed of better judgment to know what's pleasant for fantasy and what's healthy in reality. The sincerely nice thing about porn is it's not required reading or viewing - adults can choose not to partake of it. Such as you've chosen not to do. Isn't that cool?