[ SECRET POST #1901 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1901 ⌋


Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 06 pages, 150 secrets from Secret Submission Post #272.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 2 - broken links ], [ 1 2 3 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeats ]
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

(DA) Agreed. Not related to the secret, but: I'm a social scientist and a recent paper published on my main topic of research was all about how a majority group showed 'pro-social' behaviour towards an ethnic minority which had been mistreated in the recent past (forced sterilization, kidnapping children of the minority group to raise in the majority group, etc). One of the things the authors argued was 'pro-social' behaviour people showed after reading an article about their group's treatment of the minority? Their agreement with the statements 'I want [the minority group] to know I am ashamed of how we treated them' and 'It is important that [the minority group] knows how I feel about this'. And I was gritting my teeth to stop myself from shouting You don't get it to the authors. That's not pro-social, or the respondents wanting to help the minority, or the respondents being allies of the minority - that's the respondents being totally self-absorbed and making the whole issue about their feelings and their self-image.

[(Anonymous)]

Oh god, that sounds painful. I get that they're trying to do a good thing, but feeling that your guilt is the first thing that needs to be addressed is an awful, awful way of going about it.

[veronica-rich.livejournal.com]

And, this is why I think many people just sit out discussions of racism or any -ism if they're not the direct recipient of it; they think they look douchey if they talk about what they think they've seen, rather than what they experienced. I'll gladly discuss misogyny or sexism, being female, but I can't talk about other types of marginalization to any significant degree because I have no personal experience and my opinion is about as welcome to the people who do receive it, as herpes.

[fierceawakening.livejournal.com]

Y'know, I'm not sure I agree. I'm not sure "I want people to know this matters to me" is really all that self-centered. I mean, yes, it's more self-centered than "I've saved some people's lives, but kept myself anonymous because I'm privileged and I really don't want the credit" or something. But I think being upset with people for saying they want people to know they're emotionally affected by something is a bit much.

I totally get that allies get obnoxious. Just the other day someone said "People without disabilities should be the voice of the disability rights movement" and it really pissed me off because hello no. But someone saying, essentially, "I want these people to know that someone out there doesn't hate them and is on their side" is... not selfish, IMO.

[(Anonymous)]

My problem was mostly with the 'It is important [the minority group] knows how I feel about this', because I'm immediately left wondering, 'Important to whom? (also, if your paper is on how you're revolutionizing a particular field by showing that in a specific situation, pro-social behaviour occurs instead of defensive behaviour, you should really pick something that is unambiguously pro-social and not defensive, though that's an issue on the sciencey side)