[ SECRET POST #1988 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1988 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 071 secrets from Secret Submission Post #284.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

I can't speak for OP, but, seriously? at that age? Late-night calls to a few fandom friends from other countries (using cheap calling cards) was a LOT healthier than the kinds of kicks I got IRL before I got into fandom. The older people you meet online don't grope you and if they get annoying you can block them without starting drama. You don't get into physical fights with your online friends. You can't share drugs with them.

WTF @ your scaremongering. The internet is a pretty damn safe place to hang out and learn about sex, love and growing up compared to the real world.

[majorshipper]

Dude, chill. I expressed concern for the OP. I know firsthand that fandom can be a great place and a very nice alternative to RL situations.

Yeah, it can be healthier than the alternatives, but if you're in fandom, I'd assume that you're not super likely to put yourself in situations where the alternatives occur(yes, they can happen at any time, but you're not likely to engage in risky behavior if you're not socially active in a traditional way; that's how it's been for me and my friends). Fandom/the internet is a great testing ground, but when fandom bleeds into RL, with calls and IRL meetings(which seem like a logical next step, and the OP did mention that she hadn't met all of them, suggesting she has met some), you CAN have to deal with that stuff, and it CAN be dangerous.

So just chill. I wasn't attacking the OP; I was just offering an opinion and expressing concern for someone who struck me as being in a similar place as when I was at his/her age.

[(Anonymous)]

ayrt

You seem to be relying on stereotypes regarding how people who like fandom conduct themselves IRL. At the absolute best, you'd be describing most fans rather than all, and you're mistaken regarding me personally. I, too, was just offering an opinion and expressing concern for someone who struck me as being in a similar place as when I was at his/her age. I had very little parental supervision during my teens and I was a socially curious kid who didn't get along well with people my own age, so I had a lot of unsupervised time with older people. (This can easily happen if you're 'not socially active in a traditional way'.) The internet is an awful lot safer than that.

I'd note that fans who live in/near a large city and who are in a large fandom can straightforwardly slide from fandom friendship to IRL contact with people they meet in fandom. Regular meetups can happen, people can hit it off socially, and so on. It could easily be the case that OP's life is like that.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm sorry you went through those things (if I'm reading correctly? you were kind of ambiguous), but you're projecting into the secret poster situation and reading that comment as a personal attack.

[(Anonymous)]

I did, and it was a lot less bad than it could have been? anyway I didn't read majorshipper's comment as an attack so much as a naively privileged viewpoint that doesn't apply to all teenage fans by a long stretch.

[(Anonymous)]

DA

Privileged? Why?

[(Anonymous)]

ayrt

I am genuinely having a hard time articulating this beyond the 'I know it when I see it' level. There's the invisible privilege of parental supervision - she asks if the parents are cool with it and if they're paying the bills? She's assuming that someone is attentively parenting this kid and that the bills in their household get paid, neither of which are safe assumptions outside of a secure middle-class family (maybe not even inside). I guess like a lot of situations involving privilege, it's not something you'd notice unless you'd lived without it.

'If you grew up in a peaceful family, yes you were privileged' - I forget who said that but it's true.

[(Anonymous)]

learn about love? with what, a machine?