[ SECRET POST #2022 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2022 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 088 secrets from Secret Submission Post #289.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Superpower

[(Anonymous)]

Why would you need to say the obligatory "YEAHHHHH" when you can wriggle your tentacle-beard and emit gutural sounds? I can say "YEAHHHH", anybody can... shouldn't you get a more personalised version? For an eldritch abomination, you respect the meme's rules a bit too much.
As for the sunglasses, you could always take them off. There's just another pair under those... *cue motherofgod.gif*
I assumed we wouldn't get to braid your tentacles before dying... which means you'd let us? And then toss us to a gruesome death? Awesome! Tentacle braids! Except for the... you know... dying part. I don't want somebody to find my corpse besides an iPod full of Britney Spears. Think of the shame I'd bring to my family.
About Shelob, weren't you buddies? What happened? It nicked your preys? Spun its web all over your bed again? Brought that good-for-nothing toothpick Spiderman over? DO TELL.

Re: Superpower

[agentcthulhu]

Humans do not have the range of hearing to fully appreciate my gutteral sounds. It is easier to say "YEAHHHHHH" than to explain why I am not crying out loud in pain or something else.

Shelob and I are not buddies. Though the tale itself is beyond human comprehension, let's just say she needed work on respecting her elders.

There is no reason to think an iPod full of Britney Spears belongs to you. If you wish, I can take the iPod with me. This will remove the element of Britney Spears shame your family might face.

Re: Superpower

[(Anonymous)]

I think it'd sound more like a wet sort of yawn mixed with some serious gargling. Perhaps also a kitten drowning. It'd be an awesome sound anyway. If we can't hear it, you could use the sound as an undetectable ringtone! Or do your texts download directly to the built-in screen of your sunglasses, which every secret agent obviously has? *totally not a secret agent masquerading as a ranting latina unicorn*

I never liked Shelob. She was always a picky eater. This orc's too chewy, this other orc's too green, this is too crunchy, that is too rotten, and so on. Never liked my cooking, always ate it up. I tell you, I was almost its fucking comfort blanket when this hobbit butterfly thing dumped its sorry ass. And yet all the ungrateful asshole could do was eat and spin its stupid sweaters. It even ate the special orc with caramel I was saving for a special occasion! Such a bitch.

Paws (tentacles?) off my iPod! I'm in the process of reviving it and it's a very delicate procedure. Should you interfere with it, this could very well become a zombiPod. I'm sure it'd be a useful minion to you, but I don't want it to haunt my afterlife with eery renditions of Baby One More Time.