[ SECRET POST #2094 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2094 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 042 secrets from Secret Submission Post #299.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - ships it ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[deadtree]

I can see Tom being a hopelessly devoted minion and Loki being like "I'll keep him alive as long as he's useful", which has its own charm (in fiction) but outside of that...

[intrigueing]

omg yes. And then he tells the Avengers to stop being so meeeaaaannn to Loki, can't you see how sad he is? And Thor says "can it be that this man is right, that he has seen something that we have not --" "NO. We've been through this 48756348573 times Thor!"

Because you just know that in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor is solely responsible for 99% of all the woobie!Loki prompts on that universe's version of avengerkink.

[anonymouslyyours]

Headcanon: accepted.

I will now never not be able to see Thor hunched over a computer in a dark room sobbing as he waits for another woobie!Loki just needing a hug from his big brother fill on the other end of the prompts.

[greenvelvetcake]

And then he forwards all the fills to Loki.

ALL the fills.

Loki has a spam filter set up to divert them to the trash. Thor is heartbroken when he finds out.

And types up more prompts.

[deadtree]

and Tom is filling them all lbr.

[greenvelvetcake]

On company Lokiminion time, no less.

"Hiddleston, that does not look like the report I told you to work on."

[anonymouslyyours]

Sometimes when Loki is being particularly tyrannical Tom fills the prompts where Thor spanks the evil out of Loki and makes him stutter and cry while Loki blushes so prettily and tries to pretend he doesn't like it.

[taisha]

This is the best thread I've ever read.

[insolentwitch]

+10000

[deadtree]

oh my god now I am imagining Loki running his evil empire like a business. And Tom is in accounting or something like that and his negligence due to writing fanfic on the clock is going to get them all thrown in jail.

[elephantinegrace]

Completely missing the point here, but what does "lbr" stand for? (I can't believe I've been on the internet for ten years and I still don't know the shorthand. I didn't even know what Rule 34 was until last summer when I was sent a graphic gif for my Doctor Who fanfic. That was something I never needed to know. But I think knowing what "lbr" is could be useful.)

[anonymouslyyours]

Let's Be Real.

[intrigueing]

Okay, I think this bit of fanart is appropriate:

http://ikidtheenot.tumblr.com/post/30822103644/ishouldbebritish-sekra-and-thus-the

[anonymouslyyours]

Pillsbury Doughboy Thor!

Yes! I love supportive brother Thor. :D

[deadtree]

oh my god I died at Thor

[deadtree]

LOL it's so true. Thor and Tom are entirely to blame for woobie!Loki, Loki himself wants nothing to do with that nonsense because it's destroying his street cred.

[intrigueing]

And then Clint writes loads of character-bashing screeds where Loki is the biggest, baddest, meanest, most transparently evil and uber-powerful and sadistic motherfucker around who slaughters millions, conquers planets, and gets in the way of OTPs.

And Loki is like "OMG I GIVE YOU ALL THE INTERNET COOKIES" and spams recs of those fics all over tumblr. And Thor finds out and makes a secret bashing all the character-bashing fic on Fandom!Secrets and gets into a huge flamewar.

[deadtree]

biggest, baddest, meanest, most transparently evil and uber-powerful and sadistic motherfucker around who ... gets in the way of OTPs.
can I just say that I want to marry your brain?


And Clint and Tom are bnfs on opposite sides of the fandom, and it has divided the fandom so much that they can't even have holiday fic exchanges without people going ballistic.

And the Loki stans in their universe are almost as batshit crazy as his stans in ours.