[ SECRET POST #2120 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2120 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 069 secrets from Secret Submission Post #303.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - random image ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Kind of rude of you to assume that anyone who wants to be normal - which includes people who want that because it would take something that impacts their life in a very negative way, away - have to 'insecure, unhappy, and self suppressing.'

Frankly? I have a disability that makes it next to impossible for me to not feel emotions in extremes. I don't get sad - I get suicidal. I also don't 'just' get angry - I want to rip the other person's throat out. Does that also mean I'm freaking cloud 9 instead of happy? Yeah - but it's not worth the rest of it. I'd like to be normal so I don't have to worry about my self control slipping enough that I react too strongly based on my emotions. So, you'd be thanked to keep your judgement to yourself.

[(Anonymous)]

This forever.

[stainless]

I was responding not to your opinion but rather to your snarky assumption that disagreeing with you means I don't have a disability.

As far as your assertions go, however, I don't think we disagree all that profoundly. If you really look into what the social model of disability says, you'll see that it doesn't deny impairment, exhort people not to get treatments, etc. I think how you feel about your illness is up to you, and if you want it gone, that makes sense.

Where we may differ is that I see a difference between wanting an end to an impairment and wanting "to be normal." I see wanting to be normal as wanting to be like others. That's what i don't see any point in. Wanting not to suffer, to me, is something else.

I.will, however, add that when i see people who are invested deeply in the idea of cures, i do sometimes wonder. Because okay, i can sit around thinking about all the things my legs could do if I was born different... but okay, now what? How does focusing on the life I don't have improve the life I do? It doesn't seem to, to me -- it just bogs me down in envy.

IF I could choose to be born different I probably wouldn't take that -- I wouldn't be me.

[(Anonymous)]

Actually, that was a different anon. I'm the original anon. So you actually have at least three people that disagree with you and are offended.

The thing is, some disorders don't reveal themselves until the person is well into their adult life. Bipolar disorder, which usually begans around pubescence, goes undiagnosed for an average of ten years. So, no, I'm not sitting "around thinking about all the things" I could do if I didn't have this- I was literally applying to the military when the psychological portion revealed that, yes, I had inherited the disease that wrecked my grandfather's life.

There is a great difference between someone who has always been one way and someone who has the rug torn under them with the nice, little addition of institutionally approved job discrimination with no regard to the person's individual ability to handle stress. Cerebral palsy is obvious from a young age, making it something you've lived the majority of your life with. Your whole life has been this disease; mine hasn't. I didn't get a reality check until I'd surrounded myself in the lifestyle I didn't realize I wasn't allowed to have. To have that lifestyle, to be part of the military, would require me to be normal.

My "suffering" isn't simply the anguish I experience directly from my disease but the permanent stamp on my medical records, the pressing need to find a job with healthcare benefits, the constant hassle of doctor's appointments and pharmacy refills because Tricare is convinced I'm selling Lexapro on the black market if I get my meds a day early, the criminal and traffic records directly stemming from my mania, the awkwardness of trying to explain why I switched colleges because I had "medical issues", etc. If I could have a cure, just go, poof! gone, I could point to all that and say it was the disorder but it's over now. As it is, that's not and never will be true. So, yeah, I want to be fucking normal.