fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2131 ]

[ SECRET POST #2131 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2131 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Red Dwarf X]

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05. http://i.imgur.com/yB8cp.png
[linked for illustrated Snape/Harry porn]

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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

17. [SPOILERS for Detective Conan/Case Closed]

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18. [SPOILERS for Miller's Crossing]

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19. [SPOILERS for Journey into Mystery]

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20. [SPOILERS for Sanctuary]

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21. [SPOILERS for Journey into Mystery/Thor]

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22. [SPOILERS for DCnU Suicide Squad]

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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

23. [WARNING for rape]

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24. [WARNING for suicide]

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Notes:

To the anon that wanted warnings on .gif secrets: I'm not sure how I could effectively implement that. For triggery or spoilery secrets, one could just not read the text, but for .gifs by the time you get to the warning, it's already moving in your field of vision. If you have a suggestion as to how it could be done without just linking the secret (it's not breaking any rules or containing porn or gore, so that wouldn't be fair), let me know. Putting it in the notes for now.

16 is a .gif, by the way.

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #304.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I just have to vent because I basically went to keyboard-mashing rage-levels yesterday when someone in a kinkmeme of mine dismissed the emotional abuse and neglect a character suffered at the hands of their parents as "manpain" and requested that a second character (whose father physically beat him) to be unimpressed with and contemptuous of the first character.

Excuse YOU, I've dealt with assholes who think that "it's not abuse if it's not physical" all my fucking life. I've been shamed and internalized the idea that I should feel weak and pathetic and stupid for being bothered by my parents' emotional abuse and neglect for years, being told that only whiny babies and sissies would be bothered by it. Reading that prompt upset me so badly I'm still shaken a day later. Last night I dreamed about one of my best friends, who has supported and helped me all my life, even though his life is far shittier than mine, suddenly looking at me in disgust and ridicule and telling me that I have no right to be upset because his life was worse.

Please tell me I'm not alone. I feel silly for being so bothered by some dickwad on the internet, but I'd really appreciate it if people would share stories of times they were really upset by a "silly" thing like fandom too.

*hug* I don't have any stories, but yeah, abuse =/= "manpain", definitely. People on the internet can be idiots.

While I feel your pain and agree that's horrible I still think they have a right to prompt it as long as it had the warning "Trivializes Abuse" on it.

But... I have to ask. Is this Tony and Bruce?

One time I was really upset on the internet over something stupid? Uh... it was here actually. Someone said I was "doing feminism wrong" because I made a joke comparing boob windows on chicks to ass windows on dudes. I believe I made a long winded reply telling them they were wrong to say that to me. Now that I think about it I'm ashamed of my behavior.

nayrt

I saw that prompt too -- it was Tony and Clint, actually. And it didn't say "trivializes abuse" because the OP of the prompt very obviously honestly believed that neglect =/= abuse and asking Tony to be portrayed as pathetic and whiny for being upset by it, and honestly believed what they were saying was perfectly fine. And they called it "manpain" in the prompt's text, not as just Clint's opinion, with a whole "lol amirite guys?" attitude and saying "the worst thing Howard did was send Tony to boarding school" (yeah no, the worst thing he did was never show him affection, you ignorant ass).

Damn it. I knew it was The Avengers.

That sounds so very upsetting. I hate that people still think that way. If I were the mod I would keep the prompt but put the trigger warning on it. I don't know if that's possible though.

What have the mods decided? Did other anons pitch a fit over it? (Please say they did.)

The anons pitched a glorious fit and a mod screened it within a few hours, thankfully.

The OP's case was also not helped by the fact that they posted another Tony-bashing prompt that was very obviously written by the same person directly under the first prompt that involved the line "oh no my life is so hard being a rich white male" which spawned a kerfuffle of truly biting wank :)

a mod screened it within a few hours

Oh thank goodness.

Oh dude... that just sounds trolly. I almost wish I had been around to see it. Thanks for explaining it to me.

Ugh. One of THOSE fucking SJWs.

Well the most recent thing I can think of is the way some people are whining about how people are upset over what Cronus did to Mituna in Homestuck, saying it's not a big deal and they need to calm down. If you're not into Homestuck, basically what happened is one character(Cronus) started rubbing the other character's(Mituna) shoulder w/o permission and didn't stop even after the other character told him multiple times to stop and pretty much had to freak out to get him to stop.

Someone even made a comic portraying the scene like it wasn't a big deal and the people upset by it were a bunch of frothing morons, then Mituna told them to calm the hell down. That really pisses me off. The creator intentionally wrote that scene to be bad, I don't know how people can justify it. Not only is that kind of thing something that happens to people all the time, but some people like me have issues being touched even by people like family and friends. I've had a lot of bad reactions to being touched and even screamed and hit one person who put his arm around me(it was a knee-jerk reaction, I didn't even realize I did it until afterwards), but I've never been in a situation where I told someone to stop touching me and they didn't. So that scene really left me with a pit in my stomach, especially since Mituna's reaction hit a bit too close to my own reactions to being touched.

So the fact that people downplay that scene and then actively tell the people affected by it that they're being ridiculous and need to sit down and shut up b/c real life issues get in the way of enjoying their fictional stories make me more upset than I can articulate. You're not alone, anon, and you're not being ridiculous. Media doesn't exist in a vacuum, and when it comes to issues like emotional abuse, people can be offensive even if the story is fiction. Also, thanks for the chance to vent. :)

I agree that the touching scene was very inappropriate but I don't think that it was even the worst part of the Mituna/Cronus interaction (I think that reading the dialogue between mituna and cronus was the first time I was actually upset and uncomfortable while reading homestuck. Hussie did a pretty good job of portraying Cronus as the worst kind of asshole).

The amount of all of the Cronus apologists in the fandom was pretty icky. It's okay to like asshole characters, guys. You don't have to make them into woobies and try to convince people that they're just misunderstood. I think the fact that Hussie described Cronus as the "worst character in homestuck by a nautical mile" should tell you that Cronus is supposed to be interpreted to be a gigantic douchebag.

Yeah, the whole thing was awful but for me personally it was the touching thing that stood out. It was probably the first time I felt physically ill over something in a story in a long, long time.

What I don't get is, if you take Cronus' Nice Guy asshole behavior away, then what was the point of any of his scenes? If he isn't an asshole, then what is he? Because he didn't have any depth beyond that, unless you make stuff up.

ayrt

What I don't get is, if you take Cronus' Nice Guy asshole behavior away, then what was the point of any of his scenes? If he isn't an asshole, then what is he? Because he didn't have any depth beyond that, unless you make stuff up.

Unfortunately a lot of shippers are just plain delusional. They want Cronus/Mituna to bang but they feel like they can't write/draw/imagine it if Cronus is an actual asshole, so the only way they can ship it is if they do some character assassination (of course there are people out there who ship Cronus/Mituna because Cronus is a manipulative asshole, which I think is okay because at least they understand that the ship is pretty messed up)

lol I checked out the "crotuna" tag just to see what people were saying and I came across this post pretty quickly:

http://feferipeixes.tumblr.com/post/34646226570/if-the-argument-is-nooo-you-cant-comment-on

Uhhhh...when were Cronus and Mituna portrayed as pretty good friends? And also, when someone repeatedly says that they don't like the way you're touching them and want it to stop, you should stop whether you're good friends or not. Damn, tumblr

Haaaaaaha, wow. I have reactions when my own mother touches me, it has nothing to do with whether you like or know a person.

Yeah, stuff like that is why I'll avoid anyone that's a Cronus fan, just to be on the safe side.

I got in a debate with an anon over fandom ships. They weren't listening to a damn thing I was actually saying, because they seemed to think that I my opinion was very different from what it is and that I was an elitist who hated their ship. (Or something, it was really hard to tell.)

But even though they had me all wrong I felt terrible about it and felt it was all my fault and actually worried about their opinion of me. Finally I just turned off comment notifications and stopped responding, but I felt so stupid.

Not as bad as trivializing abuse of course but... yeah, fandom stuff can totally hurt.

Ugh D:

That's horrible anon! IDK how anyone can confuse 'manpain' with abuse. Those are two ENTIRELY separate things! Some people just don't know what the hell they're saying. :/

They should've warned for it, but then again they didn't see it AS abuse, so they couldn't have... Bah. Sorry you had to go through with that.

Hope you feel better soon bb! Try to distract yourself with something else? I know how hard it can be. (I keep replaying something from Monday in my head (not fandom related), and IDK WHY I CAN'T LET IT GO. Hate when that happens.)

As for fandom related things...I usually get upset when someone does like what you described and doesn't realize that something is actually abuse, so doesn't warn for it.

And there was this one case where a prompt I was following asked for a consensual sex scene with D/s between two characters, and they got a non-consensual gang-bang instead. It STARTED out fine, so I didn't know ~what was to come~. After reading those later parts I had to quit; I felt unsettled and upset for days. (I guess that could be considered an over-reaction, but...I've never been that upset after reading a fic before. Or since, actually.)

...And most recently I might've been spoiled for Halo 4. Which sucks, but isn't comparable to your story.

That sucks and is just really, really horrible. :( I'm sorry you had to deal with that.

Not nearly as bad as what happened to you, but the most upsetting fandom thing that has happened to me lately is when this sexist guy was finding bullshit reasons to bash every single female character in our fandom, calling them useless and saying they never do anything. Even though this was a fandom with a LOT of awesome female characters with a wide variety of personalities who play important roles in the story. Whenever I tried to defend them and point out stuff that the girls had done, he'd try to argue that it didn't count for some reason. "So what if Suzy managed to outsmart a major villain? If it were Bob he could've beat her up without outsmarting her! So what if Alice saved Tom's life? She cried afterwards, so she's a weakling!! It was different when Tom cried; those were MANLY tears!" I feel the same way as you in the sense that I shouldn't have been so worried about some idiot's opinions, but I was infuriated.

Since this prompt is apparently from avengerkink (I don't check it too often so I missed the ~delightful little gem you mentioned /sarcasm), you might have seen another recent fic that really, really, REALLY upset me.

The prompt called for Tony being surprised at how loud Bruce was in bed. That's ALL.

The fill, on the other hand, had Bruce take out Tony's arc reactor without asking during foreplay and Tony being completely terrified by it and thinking that he should stop things because this wasn't what he asked for, but being too scared to say no and thinking to himself that he didn't have a choice.

And the rest of the fic was basically Tony just lying there with his eyes closed and his face turned away, praying for Bruce to get it over with, and Bruce doing so in a gratuitously cruel and callous manner, calling Tony all sorts of names and manhandling him and not once stopping to see what Tony's response was or say "is this okay?" or addressing the fact that Tony clearly wasn't enjoying it. All with no dubcon or noncon trigger warning at all or any hint of nastiness or coercion.

And I don't get triggered by dubcon or noncon, but THAT fic upset me a ridiculous amount. It actually wasn't the noncon that bothered me, it was mostly due to how bluntly mean Bruce was acting and the fact that throughout the fic Tony felt extremely ashamed and dirty and like he was an object or a whore, at one point coming close to tears from Bruce's words and not wanting Bruce to see how stretched-out and messy his asshole looked after the sex, and the fic just ended right after with no resolution or dialogue, with Tony curled up exhausted with his eyes closed and trying to ignore Bruce when Bruce just rolled Tony's limp body over and started fucking him again.

Wow, that's really awful. I can't believe they didn't put any sort of warning on that. Even just reading that description disturbed me. :[

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2131 ]

What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse]

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse

Re: What's the most upsetting thing that's happened to you in fandom recently? [TW: mention of abuse