fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2136 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2136 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

[Psych]

__________________________________________________

03.

[Karl Urban]

__________________________________________________

04.

[pokemon: best wishes]

__________________________________________________

05.

[Bleach]

__________________________________________________

06.

[Elementary/X-Files]

__________________________________________________

07.

[Fievel Goes West]

__________________________________________________

08.

[Potap & Nastya Kamenskih]

__________________________________________________

09.

[Smallville]

__________________________________________________

10.

[Fairy Tail]

__________________________________________________

11.

[The Lorax]

__________________________________________________

12.

[Robot Chicken]

__________________________________________________

13.

[Downton Abbey]

__________________________________________________

14.

[Pauly Perette]

__________________________________________________

15.

[TVXQ]

__________________________________________________

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 032 secrets from Secret Submission Post #305.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I've just noticed this dilemma recently and I'm... not really sure at all what to do about it. The long and short of it is that I can't love someone (or even like them romantically) and be attracted to them at the same time. I've been thinking about why this is, and I think it's because when I younger and dealing with ~sexuality etc. I often misattributed fear/being intimidated to being attracted to someone. So I would get really nervous around certain people and think "oh! This must be attraction!"

But now this is pretty much all that does it for me. If I'm not intimidated/afraid of someone for whatever reason, I don't feel attracted to them. I don't know what normal attraction feels like. Maybe I have felt it and never recognized it, because it didn't feel strong enough (as strong as the fear)? This is becoming a huge problem recently though because I am literally not attracted to my boyfriend at all for this reason. I really like him, but because I know him well and I'm not intimidated/afraid of him, I'm just not attracted to him. What the hell do I do!? I'm 19, so I feel like it's maybe a little late in the game to get my sexuality un-fucked up, but I feel like this is pretty much going to destroy any chances of having a healthy relationship ever.

Eh, it happens and I wouldn't say it would completely ruin your chances. There are people who don't experience attraction at all [Asexuals] who end up having relationships with people who *do* experience. So it's really more a matter of finding something to make it work for you and the other person.

This is kind of my issue too, and let me just tell you that even when it works out, it's tough. I am only sexually attracted to people who are bad bets/carry certain personality traits, so I end up in situations where I'm dating boyfriend-of-the-month and I'm explaining that I will never have sex with him, not ever. Best case scenario, BF assumes I just don't like sex. Worst case scenario, BF assumes I don't want to have sex with him because he's my boyfriend, so asks if we can break up and have sex then. Which...no.

[ SECRET POST #2136 ]

apparently attraction + love = mutually exclusive for me?

Re: apparently attraction + love = mutually exclusive for me?

Re: apparently attraction + love = mutually exclusive for me?