[ SECRET POST #2177 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2177 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 058 secrets from Secret Submission Post #311.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[dazzledfirestar]

I can see how it would be problematic if a person hated a character for the same reasons that you loved them, but even then I don't necessarily see that as an insurmountable problem,unless you personally really identify with that character.

I have to disagree there. I would think finding out that a person in fact DOES hate a character because they're female/POC/LBGT would be a completely justifiable reason not to be friends with someone. At least for me.

[diet_poison]

That's not what kallanda said though? Correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems like they said "for the same reasons you liked them" which implies something other than their demographic.

Yeah, if you hated a character because they were a minority, I'd side-eye that into next week. (Liking a character because they're a minority is just kinda dumb, so I hope that isn't your reasoning here.) But if they hated a character because of a quirk or trait they had that annoyed them, but you happened to love it? Different strokes, yo.

[dazzledfirestar]

Liking a character because they're a minority is just kinda dumb, so I hope that isn't your reasoning here.

If it's the only reason you like them? Yes, that's silly. But if part of what drew you to them was that they were like you and you were finally getting some representation, I'd say that's a valid reason, assume it's not the only one.

The point I was making was that it depends on what this "hateable" trait is and saying that it shouldn't be a problem in a friendship is a naive take on it at best. If it's something as simple as "I hate how Bob ties his shoes! It drives me up the wall" yes, your point stands. But if it's something like "I hate Susie because she's a lesbian", we've got a problem. Obviously those are extreme examples, but I hope you get my point.

[(Anonymous)]

But it's not always so obvious. For example, in The Walking Dead fandom, many people hate Lori and Andrea, and I get it because they are very annoying and don't learn from their mistakes. But the amount of slut-shaming and misogynistic comments that go along with the hate... I get the feeling they wouldn't get half the amount of hate if they were male characters committing the same/similar actions.

[dazzledfirestar]

Which is why I said those are extreme examples. But when that kind of hate for characters comes out, I think it's perfectly justifiable to not want to be friends with the people doing that. That is what I'm saying here.

[kallanda_lee]

Fair enough.

Though with me, at least in r/l conversations, these seem to be things that pop up in non-fandom related things too. For example, if someone hates black people, it usually doesn't take me a fandom discussion to figure that out.

With characters though, I sort of find it tricky - do they hate them *because* they are female/POC/LGBT - or do they hate a character that happens to be female/POC/LGBT for other reasons. For example, I have a gay friend who dislikes Kurt from Glee (if you know that). Sure, it might be internalized homophobia, but upon talking with him, it seems that one of his main issues with Kurt is his choice in songs. Whether that's all there's to the story - only he knows, of course.

But what I mean is, sometimes it's difficult to find out what exactly a person's issue with character is, and it's easy to jump to conclusions.

Granted, I would be suspicious if someone would systematically dislike characters that belong to a specific minority, though.

[dazzledfirestar]

But we're discussing fandom specifically here, due to the secret. I'm well aware that it can be easier to pick up on people's prejudices in real life and I probably personally wouldn't bother continuing a conversation with such a person, let alone bring up fandom.

Yes, and I'm not saying I'd hate someone the instant they say they hate Character A. I have not once claimed that here. But if someone is using questionable language about that character, mocking stereotypes that could be applied to that character, etc then, yeah. I'm less likely to give them the benefit of the doubt.

For example, if someone said "Ew, Black Widow! What a slut!" and when I asked why they thought that, they continued on that vein, I'm not going to want to continue talking to that person.

It's just as easy to not be offensive when expressing a dislike for a character.