[ SECRET POST #2186 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2186 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


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02.
[QI]


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03.
[Supernatural]


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04.
[Haven (SyFy)]


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05.
[The Boondocks]


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06.
[Steve Rogers/Tony Stark]


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07.
[Doctor Who]


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08.
[Twilight]


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09.
[Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations]


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10.
[Stephen Colbert and Audra McDonald]


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11.
[Teen Wolf]


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12.
[Calvin & Hobbes]


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13.
[Blue Bloods]


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14.
[BBC Sherlock]


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15.


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16.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 017 secrets from Secret Submission Post #312.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Not all kids are as well behaved or respect their parents as much as you did. Believe me.

[(Anonymous)]

My argument is that there are other effective punishments, even for them.

[(Anonymous)]

Oh, for fuck's sake. Let's hear some of them.

[(Anonymous)]

"For fuck's sake"? That already tells me there's no point.

[(Anonymous)]

How would you know? Maybe I just like swearing.

[(Anonymous)]

da

Way to avoid proving your point.

[(Anonymous)]

DA

my folks threatening to revoke internet or comp access /take away the nintendo DS for the day worked fairly well on me and my sister. I avoid getting into trouble because losing my comp even for a day scares me just as much as the threat of pain. because I got shit to do and the neighborhood has become as boring as hell by now. also taking away my music does the same. I actually bought my own cell phone just so they wouldn't be able to take it away. It worked when they did though because I started losing it less and less.

taking away a privilege is very effective.

[(Anonymous)]

It never worked on me. I just...found something else to do.

[(Anonymous)]

*shrug* I have like a dozen different stories I'm working on/things I'm doing at a time. So I just feel like my entire day is wasted when I lose comp. Stupid maybe but , meh.

[(Anonymous)]

So write longhand...in shorthand. Get resourceful! Turn it into an opportunity to learn something new. Or something.

[(Anonymous)]

yeah I did that. But it turned out to bite me in the ass when I went to type it out because unless I'm writing really slow my handwriting is messy and hard to read. and when I have ideas my mind works waaaaaay faster than my hand and I can't read the shit later.

I'm not saying I can't do it, just that it's something I always dreaded because it was a pain all around. Not fun. Nowadays I have a voice recorder so its a little better. and I rarely get restricted from my comp completely anyways so ehh. my point was that taking away priveleges is an option that can work. It's mostly what my folks now use anyways. I don't think I was spanked at all eleven onwards,

[diet_poison]

I think that really depends on the kid. I could (and still can) get really fixated on one particular thing I want to do and I don't have a lot of flexibility lol. If the one thing I want to do is made unavailable when I'm not expecting it it throws a wrench in my whole day. And as a kid I didn't have the rationality to even try to think, "oh well, I guess maybe I can think about doing something else". I'd just get upset and bored and cross. As such, grounding/taking away privileges worked well for me.

[(Anonymous)]

It can be. But for me I was just content sitting quietly in my room. In fact I had fun being in there, so that didn't really work so well, lol.

[diet_poison]

I haaaated being in my room when I was a kid. Boring as fuck.

[(Anonymous)]

Being sent to my room was never a punishment. All my toys lived there, lol.

[diet_poison]

See, my mom knew better than that. She only let us keep certain things (like our stuffed animals) in our room, and most of our toys stayed in the designated playroom, so when we got sent to our rooms we had to be a little more resourceful than usual and it was definitely effective discipline.

[(Anonymous)]

Nowadays? Take the fucking cell phone away! Straightens those little shits right up.

[truxillogical]

I think in most cases, the method of specific threatening and following through would be effective. That is, "If you don't stop screaming, I'm taking your tv away for a week." And then if the kid screams even one more time for half a second, you go to their room (assuming they had a tv there), unplug the tv, take it out, and it doesn't go back for a week.

But it doesn't work immediately. It's sort of like, well, training a dog. They have to learn that if they deliberately disobey their parent, there will be consequences. And it has to be consistent. But it takes time and can often wind up inconveniencing the family ("Stop that or we're going home" means you'd better be prepared to haul out of wherever you are and go straight home if "that" happens again).

It requires a lot of effort, which is why it doesn't get used so much. And as I said, it's not immediate. And sometimes, you need a little immediacy.

I got a handful of swats as a child, maybe a belt once or twice (and in retrospect, it was never, y'know, a full-armed swing meant to hurt or leave marks. It was always less about hurting a kid and more about, well, punishing them). I don't think it's a terrible, awful thing, but it's one of those things that's so hard to regulate and judge. "I didn't hit him that hard" means different things to a 30-year-old man and a 4-year-old child. The biggest thing, I think, is if it's something a parent does, they absolutely never should do it while they're angry.

[diet_poison]

Doing it with belts gives me immediate DNW, and it never even happened to me. I do not think that is necessary, ever.

[truxillogical]

I remember "belt" but not really much about it. When you're a kid, whatever your parents do seems normal (which can certainly be a problem). It wasn't really a thing that happened very often.

As an adult, as I said, I wouldn't be upset at the idea of a swat on the behind (so long as the parent did it when they weren't angry), but belt is something that I would say goes too far and is just unnecessary, unless you're going for scariness. Which you shouldn't.

[diet_poison]

unless you're going for scariness

That's a HUGE part of the reason I'm against all this. Spanking a kid who just tried to run into the street is an effective way to teach them "THIS IS BAD, NEVER DO IT" and for dangerous activities, that's a good thing. However, for other situations that aren't as immediately dire, threatening your kid with physical punishment if they don't do what you want - ESPECIALLY if that punishment has a tangible object associated with it, like a belt - just generates an environment of fear for the kid. Humans naturally recoil from pain. It's not the same as the threat of grounding, writing sentences*, or being given extra chores, all of which my mother employed on me many a time. None of those things generate the basic, instinctual fear response associated with physical pain that corporal punishment does when used routinely. By extension, that can erode the trust between a child and parent. The line between discipline and abuse is veeeery thin when that discipline is physical.

*I'm surprised nobody has mentioned this one so far haha. It's akin to the old-fashioned "writing lines on a chalkboard" thing that never actually happened to me at school, probably because it's not really practical. I got sentences a lot though. My mom would write a line on a piece of lined paper - "I will not talk back to my parents", for example - and make me copy it 25 times (or 50, or 100, depending on how severe the infringement was). I haaaated it. It was definitely a good deterrent.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm the last anon that replied, to you, not to 'for fuck's sake' person. But I am curious to hear about your ideas. I have watched a few episodes of Super Nanny, but honestly, I still wouldn't say no to the occasional spank, IF and ONLY IF all else should fail.