[ SECRET POST #2188 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2188 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


__________________________________________________



02.


__________________________________________________



03.


__________________________________________________



04.


__________________________________________________



05.


__________________________________________________



06.


__________________________________________________



07.


__________________________________________________



08.


__________________________________________________



09.


__________________________________________________



10.


__________________________________________________



11.


__________________________________________________



12.


__________________________________________________



13.


__________________________________________________



14.


__________________________________________________



15.


__________________________________________________













Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 05 pages, 102 secrets from Secret Submission Post #313.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

This got longer than I expected.

[(Anonymous)]

NAYRT

You can change your opinions, but they're still a part of who you are, and they fit in with everything else you are. Changing them (IMO, obviously,) should be about aligning yourself with the truth, not about fitting into a group more seamlessly. The fact that your opinions are not immutable doesn't mean they are, or should be, completely negotiable.

I agree with the importance of treating people with dignity and respect. That's exactly why I don't believe in kicking them out of my life for myriad flimsy reasons heatedly proposed on the internet. Minorities get that respect from me, and so does everyone else. I make the distinction between how people treat each other and what opinions they hold by looking at their actions. That's a test that many loud, self-proclaimed good people don't pass, and a surprising number of people who say shocking things do.

I feel like I have a right to criticize someone when I care about them and want them to be a better person. That's also the kind of arguing that I've found effects actual, long-term change. It's not "I'll cut off contact and tell everyone how horrible you are if you don't do this," it's "you're my friend and I want you to extend your caring to this group of people that I believe are worthwhile and sympathetic." There's no thundering YOU SHOULD, partly because I don't like that, and partly because I don't need it to get my point across. I've seen little old ladies correct their friends very effectively - "you know, it's not Christian to use the word 'nigger'" - and while that specific example isn't my style, I want more of that in activist discourse: the sense that what we're doing and saying should be making things right for all people. Building relationships, instead of destroying them.

I have nothing against avoiding someone, if what you've heard from them disagrees with you. And I have nothing against kicking a person out of a community if they can't seem to stop proselytizing (i.e. that evangelical Christian in an rp who was making a nuisance of herself). But I'm completely opposed to pressuring people, in fandom, to shun and villify other people for believing things they disagree with.

I don't know where any other person got their values, or why they believe what they believe. They get a chance with me based on how they relate to me. And if it turns out that they're harmful to others, I see if something can be done about that. Generally, the answer is yes.

We need to stop acting like adults are set in stone, to such an extent that verbal sledgehammers are needed! We need to give the kind of help we'd like to get, and would be willing to accept. There's countless unjust things to be angry about, but no one signed up to be a punching bag, or the stand-in for all of them. And scapegoating is not good activism.