[ SECRET POST #2189 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2189 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 084 secrets from Secret Submission Post #313.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 2 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[aquila_black]

I feel like there's an important difference between having kinks and being vulgar and entitled about them. And while there are plenty of people on dating sites who don't sound like self-centered jerks, it's reasonable to be kind of repulsed by the ones that do. The tone LJ/DW fandom takes when talking about most kinks is night-and-day different, and more ... thoughtful? Respectful? I'm not sure what the right word to use would be. But I can see how, if he developed the kink in fandom, the sexist, cater-to-me version would cause culture shock.

Whether he comes off as creepy or not depends a lot on how he goes about it.

It's not what I participate in fandom for, but fandom is a place where I meet people I share kinks with, and I much prefer it to sites dedicated to getting people together in any sense. Because fandom is not an exclusively sexual space, everyone has veto power over whether to talk about sex. If I find someone I'm comfortable with and curious about, it may come up, but I never have to justify why I'm not discussing kink with whoever approaches me.

In terms of what the OP's thinking of doing, I didn't post addressing him because I wanted to think it over. Dealing with other fen in a space where you get to know them as people and vice versa seems reasonable. I know people who have gotten into happy, long term relationships that way. I kind of side-eye his writing for fandoms exclusively because they have incest kink potential and "meeting partners" potential. That feels a little forced. If he's really in fandom and not just fishing for girls, writing for the canons he cares about and talking to people who write fics he's liked would make more sense to me. Only a subset of those people will be available or interested, I'm sure, but ... it would be a good place to look for community and romantic interests. Everyone who's written incest had to get over their inhibitions about it, to a greater or lesser extent, so they might be able to help him get over his worries about "what this says about me," at the very least.