Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2013-01-02 06:55 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2013-01-02 06:55 pm
[ SECRET POST #2192 ]
⌈ Secret Post #2192 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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[Tales of the Abyss]
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[Merlin, RPS]
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[Lilo & Stitch]
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Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 032 secrets from Secret Submission Post #313.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
Re: Here's some advice
(Anonymous) 2013-01-04 01:09 pm (UTC)(link)You make a lot of unfounded assumptions about me based on the fact that I do not think everyone is the same as me. Or that I know some people do base whether or not they want to do something on how much energy, time, and money it would involve. That includes friendships with people. For some people social situations are draining, that includes just going to dinner or being in a crowd.
(Notice I say some people and the word me and I did not enter that. Guess where I scale on the introvert-extrovert scale. I'll give you a hint, I actually like to party and bar hop. I would go scuba diving every weekend if weather permitted and I had the money. I, however, have been surrounded by introverts my entire life. So I understand how I look at going out and doing things is not how they look at it. It's called empathizing, try it some time.)
You seem to be projecting your own issues from being an insecure teenager onto the OP. See your continued reiteration of, "When I was 17..." and "I know OP might not be lonely, but when I..."
The OP is not 17 year old you.
The introverts of the world are not 17 year old you.
They are not all quietly lonely.
They can be perfectly happy with friends just on the internet, or even just one friend or none.
That's nice that you finally got over your social awkwardness to emerge as the extrovert you always were, or something. Frankly I don't care. Perhaps if I repeat it enough you will understand that everyone does not have your level of need for social interaction. It's not a confidence issue for many introverts, it's the fact they find social interaction draining and/or they don't need as much human contact as extroverts do.
Your advice that the OP do what you did, because of course they just have to go out and make friends, is irritating. Your further replies are condescending. Again stop lacking in empathy and understanding that other people are not you.
As for the unnatural way to live. That is your opinion. Again some people do not want, or need, lots of face time with others. There have always been people like this. The only difference now a days is that more introverts are meeting online rather then living in their homes alone.
Try to understand that not every person in the world feels the need to go out and make friends. Some are okay with having social contact via the internet. You might not agree and think they should fix themselves, but if they are perfectly happy what anyone else wants or thinks does not matter. When it becomes a problem for them, not other people, that's when steps should be taken to help them change.
Re: Here's some advice
There are only two kinds of people. There are introverts, who sit at home alone all day except for the computer, and extroverts, who party all the time and go scuba diving. There is nothing in between. If I like talking to people sometimes, I'm an extrovert full stop.
I am now going to disguise my extended complaining as an appeal to empathy and pretend that's not condescending. Frankly I believe any sort of advice-giving that isn't "whatever you're doing right now is absolutely healthy" is condescending.
Basing advice on your own previous experiences as a human being is like so lame.