[ SECRET POST #2243 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2243 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


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02.
[Evolution]


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03.
[My Chemical Romance and One Direction]


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04.
[silence of the lambs]


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05. http://oi46.tinypic.com/vzc4lk.jpg
[linked for casual nudity; not porn but not the artsy kind either]


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06. http://i48.tinypic.com/2ivll3b.png
[somewhat sexual photomanip]


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07. http://i.imgur.com/88IwqTG.jpg
[and this one has naked kim jong il in it]



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08.


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09.
[paranatural]


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10.


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11.


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12.


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13.


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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]













14. [SPOILERS for Walking Dead]



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15. [SPOILERS for Super Dangan Ronpa 2]



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16. [SPOILERS for Pokemon BW 2]



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17. [SPOILERS for Walking Dead]



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18. [SPOILERS for Homestuck]



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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]














19. [WARNING for rape]



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20. [WARNING for dub-con]

[The Rocketeer]


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #320.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - template ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Re: 2 - why can't a romantic partner also be a friend? If a friend is somebody you talk to, hang out with, and generally share interests with...why can't a romantic partner encompass all that and also be the one they're intimate with?

[(Anonymous)]

My boyfriend is my friend. Absolutely. He is not my best friend, however much I adore him, because that spot is filled by my absolute best friend in the world. I do not want to bone my best friend, because our relationship just isn't like that.

This is one of the many reasons I literally cannot ship Holmes/Watson, Harry/Ron, Lumiere/Cogsworth, what-have-you.

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT - But they're saying that if Person B is Person A's only friend, then if they got together, Person A would cease to have any friends - which isn't true, as you and I are both pointing out. (And presumably, if B is A's only friend, that would also technically make them their best friend, so I'm not even sure where you're going with this.)

Also, while you may not want to bone your best friend, it's not like that holds true for everybody. I mean, ship and let ship and all, but my partner is my best friend, and I'm his, and I'm rather tired of the accusation that something is somehow "lost" simply because we decided that a romantic relationship is a better fit for us than a platonic one. (Yes, the cry is at fictional ships and all, but whenever I see it, it always comes with the implication that an epic friendship and sexual intimacy are mutually exclusive, and then I just sort of pity them once I get past the irritation of somebody trying to police shipping with a groundless claim.)

[(Anonymous)]

Nothing's lost, but it's still a different relationship.

[(Anonymous)]

NA

I think there's a huge distinction between your lover also being your best friend (which I think is common and normal) and your only friend also being your lover. For me personally, it's a squick because it comes across as extremely co-dependent. It's great when your lover is also your best friend, but sometimes you need other people too, you know?

[(Anonymous)]

+1

If nothing else, it's good to have someone else to talk to when you're have relationships problems. (Which EVERYONE does.)

(Of course, I DO end up shipping ships like this, but I like ships that are dysfunctional and co-dependent. But IRL I think it's good to have at least one other person you can talk to about things, even if your lover is your BEST friend.)

[(Anonymous)]

nayrt

It's not that a romantic partner can't be a friend as well, but that "friend" and "romantic partner" are different roles and types of relationships that are both important for people to have.

It's not, like, essential for happiness to have both, but for a lot of people it's vastly preferable. Just as people who have friends but no romantic partner can often feel like they're missing something no matter how much they love their best friend, a person who has a romantic partner but no friends can often feel like they're missing something too, no matter how much they love their romantic partner.

So if your only friend becomes your romantic partner, you do kind of lose that friend in some ways. You gain a romantic partner, which is great, but there are some things (perspective and clearly separated identities, to name a couple) that romantic partners by their very nature can't provide, and friends can.

Of course, the flip side is that if you only like one person, and they're your best friend, you won't have a romantic partner. In which case, if you can't have both, it really depends on whether you are in greater need of a friend or a romantic partner.

[(Anonymous)]

...Those are quite a lot of assumptions you're making about other people's relationships.

For me, friends are people I get along with and can talk to about things that interest us. Yes, I need people to talk to because I can get a little stir-crazy inside my own head, but that need is also fulfilled by [drumroll] my romantic partner. Who started out as a friend, became my best friend, and then we decided we sort of really wanted to fuck. He hasn't stopped being that person I get along with and talk to about our interests - in fact, he's pretty much the only person I talk to that shares almost all my interests in some capacity or another. Hell, sometimes he's the only person I can talk to about certain things simply because he knows me so well and nothing is taboo between us. I've never had that with a friend, even a really close friend, so I really don't see where this whole accusation of something being lost when a friendship turns into a romance comes from. Maybe it holds true for some people, but it's certainly not a universal phenomenon.

-ayrt