case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2013-03-12 06:33 pm

[ SECRET POST #2261 ]


⌈ Secret Post #2261 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


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02.
[The Gamers 2: Dorkness Rising]


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03.
[My Mad Fat Diary]


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04.
[Homestuck]


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05.
[Prequel]


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06.
[Kaichou wa Maid-sama, Nana, UraBoku, Sukitte Ii na yo, Tonari no Kaibutsu-kun, and Sakurasou no Pet na Kanojo]


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07.
[Skyrim]


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08.
[Dangan Ronpa]


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09.
[Star Wars/Spaceballs]


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10.
[Baraka]


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11.
[Yosoeb Yang / B2ST]


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12.
[Wolf Children Ame & Yuki]


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13.
[Charmed]


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14.
[The Following]


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15.
[Sherlock]


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16.
[Penny and Aggie]


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17.
[Teen Wolf]


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18.
[Sengoku Basara]


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19.
[Big Bang Theory]


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 061 secrets from Secret Submission Post #323.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
invoke: (Default)

[personal profile] invoke 2013-03-13 03:43 am (UTC)(link)
I understand that people need places to vent, but you'd think people would realize that a public profile that you're using to try and date people isn't the best place to do so! I can't even imagine writing something like that. And I wouldn't say all of it is venting, either...some of them make themselves out to be pretty stellar on their profiles, or paint their exes in a negative light and themselves as the martyr - and then answer the questions with things that show their inner jerk.

The OKCupid tumblr example was just the first thing that came to mind because I've had friends linking articles about it more recently, but come to think of it, my first exposure to the whole idea of "Nice Guys" was this blog post.

I guess I'm kind of half and half on her comments...yes, she was unforgiving, but at the same time, Nice Guy Syndrome isn't something that should just be ignored. I'm not saying that guys have no right to feel bitter about how past relationships have gone, or lonely, or anything like that - but women don't owe them anything by default, and the entitled attitude needs to change, you know?
harp: (Default)

[personal profile] harp 2013-03-13 04:05 am (UTC)(link)
Yes, I do know.

Yet another reason why I wish so hard for the day when people realize that instead of spending energy looking at the problem child throwing the temper tantrum (that's what the "nice guy" is doing- he's ignored so he's kicking his feet and throwing a babby tantrum like a huge babby) we do like Miss Binney and say "I like the way Ramona remembers to raise her hand". I mean yes we need to scold people sometimes, but there seems to be an awful lot of scolding and how can we expect the dunderheads to know what to do on their own? Clearly they don't know.

(By the way, I'm not trying to tell you or anyone how to live. This is just my month's goal, to re-spin all of the don'ts in my vocabulary into proactive, statements, like "don't skip your chores --> do your work right away" and stuff like that)

(Anonymous) 2013-03-13 10:11 am (UTC)(link)
Late but...

One of the things about Nice Guys though, that I don't think was mentioned, is that a lot of them seem to think of women as *things* not people. In the worst cases it's like they think women are vending machines: Put a nice action in and her legs should pop open so you can access her slot! If that doesn't happen then it's totally the vending machine malfunctioning, not anything else.

With that type of mindset it's more likely that 'I like how X is doing it' is simply going to teach them a new set of buttons they have to push to get to that slot, instead of solving the root of the problem.
diet_poison: (Default)

[personal profile] diet_poison 2013-03-13 02:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, this.

When I see a Nice Guy I don't even consider them dating material. I don't want to be with someone who has that attitude and at the core so many of them do, and it's so gross. It's dehumanizing, frankly.

Maybe their attitude will change one day, but I'm not gonna stick around for that. And maybe they aren't really that sexist, but if they behave like that I'm not gonna take that chance, and I'm not gonna waste my breath telling him how to be Even Nicer. Treating women with respect needs to be the motivation for their actions, not something they do superficially because their motivation is sex.

Also, I like your use of the vending machine analogy, and the "pushing a new set of buttons" thing. That illustrates it very well, I think.