[ SECRET POST #2284 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2284 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 015 secrets from Secret Submission Post #326.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - random porn ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

OP reply

[(Anonymous)]

Not when it leaves me more messed up than how I started.
Unless I want to choke down more antidepressants.

Taking unnecessary chances used to be a thing I did, but I learned my lesson well on that.

Re: OP reply

[(Anonymous)]

But...not all relationships that don't last forever fucks you up. Or it shouldn't. Friendships come and go, it's just the way some work. You know yourself best and what your limits are, but with a defeatist attitude like this I don't really see how you can ever be happy.

Re: OP reply

[(Anonymous)]

Forever is one thing. Them forgetting me abruptly and on such a petty basis as my moving away is another. I've always made it a point to keep in contact with people, even if I live far away.
I think only my fiance, my family, and one of my friends ever actually made an effort to get back to me in any form.

It shouldn't fuck me up, but it does. I have pretty bad issues with depression and anxiety, especially social anxiety. So most problems like this tend to make me completely flip my shit if I don't dial up the apathy immediately.
I'm obviously not completely apathetic, but enough that it lets me manage my emotions. So putting more stress and drama in there messes up the whole system.
Being lonely sucks. But my health and safety are a bit more important.

Re: OP reply

[(Anonymous)]

I'm sorry your friends were such dicks.
That said, this is ridiculous. Trying to live your life alone will fuck you up a thousand times worse than people leaving you ever will. Your one regret on your dying day will be not trying harder to get along with people. This playing the martyr thing won't do you any favors in the long run.

Re: OP reply

[(Anonymous)]

Some people are good at keeping in touch at a distance. Some people just aren't. I've learned to accept that I fall into the latter category, and deal with it by cultivating a lot of shallow arm's-length Internet relationships and a small handful of real-life friends who are also friends of my husband, who is more socially adept and more or less forces me to stay in contact with them.

Cynical, impatient and cold, though? I don't think it's necessary to go that route to keep a safe emotional distance. Caution bordering on paranoia about my real-life information, while keeping a laser-like focus on fandom matters, works pretty well for me.

Re: OP reply

[(Anonymous)]

Hang on OP,your fiance? You've managed to get engaged and keep a good relationship with family. I think you need to view those people as your core support group, and friends as transient and enjoy them whilst you are with them.

Hard to do I know, I angst all the time about friends, but I don't have a close family or a partner.

Re: OP reply

[silverr]

I'm truly sorry you feel that way.

(Personally, I accept that fandom associations will be fleeting, try to enjoy them while they last. that, and I keep my expectations low.)