OP here a bit late replying but thank you for your kind words and advice.
If I could hang on for a month, then I could see my way clear to sucking it up and getting on with getting on. I just cannot muster the motivation to face what looks to be my lot in life for the REST of my life (and then I may be too sick to enjoy it -- if I do not end up getting sick beforehand as so many around me have). Not for one month more, not one week more, Not. One. Day. More. I have hit the wall as far as that is concerned. But I cannot seem to convince my brain of otherwise. I don't WANT to be/feel this way is my issue.
IDEK. I will see what the dawn brings I suppose. Thanks to everyone for your responses, before, and now. :-(
Re: mid-life anon still wants to change rides
If I could hang on for a month, then I could see my way clear to sucking it up and getting on with getting on. I just cannot muster the motivation to face what looks to be my lot in life for the REST of my life (and then I may be too sick to enjoy it -- if I do not end up getting sick beforehand as so many around me have). Not for one month more, not one week more, Not. One. Day. More. I have hit the wall as far as that is concerned. But I cannot seem to convince my brain of otherwise. I don't WANT to be/feel this way is my issue.
IDEK. I will see what the dawn brings I suppose. Thanks to everyone for your responses, before, and now. :-(