I had a friend for a very long time who often told me how horrible I was as a person, listed all my faults, and accused me of bringing her down. She used to tell me that I was responsible for dragging her down and ruining her life. Several times she "broke up" with me after these little sessions and it might be years before she came back/got in touch. I cared about her, despite this, and never closed the door on her when she came back.
The last time she stopped calling me, I stopped calling her. I moved on with my life, went back to school, got new friends who value and support me and my personal growth. I'm happier than I've ever been.
Sometimes I look at her Twitter feed or her FB page when I get nostalgic for the times she wasn't shredding me up. It reminds me of why the good times were never worth the bad ones and prevents me from reaching out to her. She's a recluse now, weighs about 500 lbs, and has no RL friends, only her family. I'm sad to see what has become of her but I'm not sad that I'm not her whipping boy any more.
Based on our current situations, I realize how toxic she was to me and how much better off I am now without her in my life. I hope that you recover well, OP, and realize that you are so much more than what one horrible friend said to/about you.
Re: Friend Break Up
The last time she stopped calling me, I stopped calling her. I moved on with my life, went back to school, got new friends who value and support me and my personal growth. I'm happier than I've ever been.
Sometimes I look at her Twitter feed or her FB page when I get nostalgic for the times she wasn't shredding me up. It reminds me of why the good times were never worth the bad ones and prevents me from reaching out to her. She's a recluse now, weighs about 500 lbs, and has no RL friends, only her family. I'm sad to see what has become of her but I'm not sad that I'm not her whipping boy any more.
Based on our current situations, I realize how toxic she was to me and how much better off I am now without her in my life. I hope that you recover well, OP, and realize that you are so much more than what one horrible friend said to/about you.