fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2359 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2359 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 066 secrets from Secret Submission Post #336.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

out of curiosity, what makes you think anon's tone is so hateful?

i read it twice and all i'm seeing is a lot of exasperation and frustration, which tbh, "how do i open a new tab" is not a thing to be continually baffled by forever unless she's got dementia

after years of tech support for my grandma, i can totally relate, but i don't see any hate

The constant belittling way they refer to their parent.

I mean, say you heard someone describe a significant other this way, and not a parent. You probably wouldn't think they loved them, would you?

OP probably didn't mean it, but the tone is still there. Then again, I didn't mean to start a shitstorm with one capslocked sentence but look where intentions get us.

OP, please be nice to your Mom! I hope getting the meanness out here means she didn't get it IRL.

Edited 2013-06-19 00:05 (UTC)

People and their parents interact differently than what you and your parents do, so no, their rant doesn't indicate they hate their mom, it comes off as frustration for the most part.

lol a rant means OP isn't nice to their mom, so cute you think that

How old are you?

Old enough, even I give my parents attitude sometimes or get frustrated with or mad at them, it's doesn't mean I'm not nice to them or that I hate them.

You know what? I was an incredibly crabby teenager. Partly due to depression, partly due to being an incredibly crabby teenager. And people called me a jerk when I was being a jerk, and I thought they were just oppressing me.

Then I got older and I realized how frustrating it is to be around someone who's acting like a crabby teenager. I think sometimes you don't really grow up until you're stuck dealing with people who haven't grown up yet. You need that mirror.

Of course I loved my parents! And I'm going to assume OP loves their parents because they're still doing stuff for them. But I often didn't sound like I did. I sounded like I hated them. And, unless your parents are actually awful, that's wrong.

DA

And when they were frustrated with you, would it have been appropriate for the to express that frustration, anonymously and in a forum that they knew you did not frequent, in ways that were not entirely flattering to you, the object of their frustration? Or would it have meant that they didn't really love you?

It would mean you were a whiny fucking teenager.

Right, so they would've had a legitimate complaint.

Don't worry. You'll grow.

Oh, Noodle. You're adorable when you troll. Sometimes.

Everyone's reading comprehension is really shitty here. I said it looked like they didn't love them. Not that they didn't. These are different things.

Yes, and expressing frustration about your crabby teenager does not equate to not loving them.

Venting frustrations never sounds like someone doesn't love someone to me because I get frustrated easily and often complain. Like I said, not all of us have your family, plus, we are all not you. Some people can take more than others, some people can easily let things go, but some can't and calling someone a whiny teenager because they have a lower tolerance than you is plain stupid.

So 15 then

actually, it sounds like pretty typical exaggerated internet venting to me

i see much worse routinely on facebook and tumblr, this just sounds like they're really frustrated with a very particular thing their mother does, not that they don't love or respect her

i also don't really see any belittling there, since they aren't calling her stupid, or much of anything except "mom" with the implication that she's stubbornly refusing to learn anything and won't function on her own, which is a pretty annoying thing for anyone to do

I think they don't have that great a relationship with their mother (the part where the mom acts high and mighty when the op doesn't know how to do something, every single time), though, which changes entirely how much you can put up with something like this.

It's very different to help someone over and over who is genuinely thankful, and another to help someone who feels and acts weirdly arrogant the few times you fail to help.

I got the vibe that the op is fed up with other facets of their relationship, but the "help me do this thing you've showed me how to do 500 times" is the one thing they felt safe to rant about, for whatever reason (maybe it's the easier thing to put into words, out of all the grievances in the relationship, since they're not loaded with super personal details that they would feel uncomfortable sharing with the internet).

OP

Wow, you sure got a lot out of me being pissed off about my Mom on a laptop. That is the only thing she does that ticks me off. The real issues are with my father. Believe me. I've got the therapy bills to prove it.

It was more this line "Stop acting high and mighty when I don't know how to fix something. You don't know how to do it either, so stop being so fucking smug when I admit defeat." but eh, you're right, there was a lot of extrapolation going on there.

Sorry, I just realized how this must look from your point of view.

The hell with your line, so now the OP venting means they're mean to their mum? jfc you make a lot of leaps in judgment.

perhaps it was the title, you know, FUCK YOU MOM

That was chardmonster's title, not OP's.

Ah in that case. I retract the sentiment and teach,myself to better follow insanely long threads.

[ SECRET POST #2359 ]

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armchair psychology incoming

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