fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2377 ]

[ SECRET POST #2377 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2377 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 071 secrets from Secret Submission Post #340.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Talking to people on the internet terrifies me. It legitimately makes me feel so nervous I feel sick.
I'm nowhere near so awkward in real life. It doesn't make any sense.
How about you f!sers? What is more awkward for you, if anything?
(Reposted from posting in the wrong place, prime examples of my awkwardness DX)

Other way around for me, I'm nervous about talking to people no matter what, but at least I can attempt it without freaking out while online. It helps that I can't see their faces or gestures and wonder what it is I'm not reading right (I'm not good with social cues).

I'm sorta awkward no matter what, but imo it's much easier to talk to people online where you don't have to look people in the eyes and worry about them picking up on any nervous ticks or body language you have.

Plus you don't have to worry about if you have spinach in your teeth, or if your hair looks out of place, or any of that either. You also have more time to think your words through, so if you don't reply immediately it doesn't have to be awkward or odd.

I'm like you OP. I've been known to literally go up and introduce myself to people into RL - but online? I'll dither for *hours* before working up the nerve to say something [non-anonly].

I'm less nervous on the internet. A lot of that comes from knowing that people can just read what I'm saying, look up my profile or read my fics or whatever and know at least a few vague things about me before they engage with me, and vice versa; online we tend to vet each other before engaging in one-on-one conversation. Irl, I have more worries about ~*~being judged~*~, which I guess is the legacy of being an outsider nerd kiddie blah blah, plus until recently I was living in the goddamn south. I'm not THAT nervous irl in most circumstances, though I find unfamiliar social situations hard sometimes, but I'm way more careful about what I let out in public and fretting over that results in awkwardness. ~~Also, it is harder to have sock accounts irl~~

It's the other way around for me! ...Well, kind of. Talking to people in person isn't so much awkward as in shy/nervous as it is awkward as in kind of difficult and cumbersome. I always have trouble thinking of stuff to say, or how to say it, etc. My brain-mouth connection is a little spotty.

I don't usually have a problem talking to people in person because that's a big part of my job, but sometimes it can be kind of awkward when I'm one on one with someone for a decent length of time and we have nothing in common and I don't know what to talk to them about.

Online I don't have any issues because if I'm talking to someone it's almost definitely going to be because we have something in common.

My weakness is talking on the phone, or more specifically, leaving people voicemails. I try to plan out ahead of time what I'm going to say if I get the voicemail but most of the time I end up sounding kind of awkward, I think, especially if someone else is in the room listening to me, which makes me feel self conscious and afraid I'm going to mess up.

Striking up conversation. Basically, I suck at making threads because I don't know what to say or how to say it in ways that actually invite discussion :U

I'll jump into topics if I feel like it, but coming up with one is kinda boggling to me.

Depends on what it is. I find that getting into "spirited debates" is easier for me to do without getting nasty online, because I can think before I speak, I don't have to respond right away and I can look at my words before the other person hears them. IRL, I tend to either shy away from spirited debates because I'm afraid of saying someone rude in the heat of the moment (I have impulse control problems), or be unnecessarily confrontational/sharp-tongued.

I also tend to like online discussions when talking about specific subjects like fandom or academia or politics, things you need a bit of a well-reasoned argument for, because again, it's easier to think the whole thing over and put down a full paragraph of your thoughts and opinions in text form rather than having to say things live. Plus, anonymity shield eases any worrying about seeming stupid.

For general conversations where I'm just chatting about things/exchanging stories and thoughts, or where I'm talking about a specific person's personal situations/experiences, real life is infinitely better. It's hard to get a personal touch across online, what with the lack of a reliable tone/body language/eye contact/ability to interrupt each other/kind of "sync up" and finish each other's thoughts.

I don't like talking online to people I know IRL - I'm more attentive than most people to stuff like tone and cadence and expressions, so live verbal communication provides me with way, way, way more information than text communication, and I therefore tend to get really disoriented and feel like I'm missing out on 50% of the conversation when I talk online with someone who I'm used to using face-to-face communication with. Hell, I even vastly prefer voice phoning to texting.

So as a general rule -- talking about generalizable subjects where you want to discuss your opinions with someone and don't really care who in particular you're talking to: online. Talking about personal things and opinions associated with specific people's lives and actions, especially people you know IRL: in real life.

For me talking to strangers online is waaaayyyy easier that in real life. On the internet many places are set up around common interests, so you can go to a site or community and already know that you have something in common with people there. And communication is largely text-based, and writing is more my forte, so I can say things and pause and reread things and edit my words before posting, without worrying about being dressed right and making eye contact and my face not doing weird things. Yesterday I was talking to someone who kept interrupting himself to look at my face and go "What's wrong?! D:" I didn't know what to say, especially since I thought I was pretty expressionless at the time. I have no idea what's wrong, dude! My face always looks like this, just finish the damn conversation! I never have that kind of problem online.

Me too, OP. I'm super outgoing IRL and even good at laughing it off when I embarrass myself.

ONline though, no way. I managed slowly to feel a little less anxious online and make some friends but once things moved to tumblr I was S.O.L. I made an account and followed some of the people I used to be able to talk to but I can't even bring myself to reblog things. I freeze up completely.

(reply from suspended user)

I feel awkward online and in real life but it isn't as bad online since I have more time to think about what I want to say. Plus, there isn't that pressure to talk that there is in real life. If I'm in a group of people and I don't talk then I'm considered weird. It's especially frustrating if it's a topic I don't know a lot about or that I'm not interested in. If I'm online then I can just focus on what interests me and it's much easier to stop an online conversation if I do start to feel overwhelmed.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2377 ]

Talking to People on the Internet

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