fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2390 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2390 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

[Karl Urban]

__________________________________________________

02.

[Legend of Zelda]

__________________________________________________

03.

[Pride and Prejudice]

__________________________________________________

04.

[Shingeki no Kyojin]

__________________________________________________

05.

[Les dossiers du Bell]

__________________________________________________

[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

06. [SPOILERS for 'Injustice: Gods Among Us'; 'Man of Steel']

__________________________________________________

07. [SPOILERS for Welcome to Night Vale]

__________________________________________________

08. [SPOILERS for Young Justice]

__________________________________________________

09. [SPOILERS for Merlin]

__________________________________________________

10. [SPOILERS for Supernatural]

__________________________________________________

11. [SPOILERS for Umineko no Naku Koro ni]

__________________________________________________

[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

12. [WARNING for incest]

[Felica & Ryon Day, "Co-Optitude"]

__________________________________________________

13. [WARNING for incest]

__________________________________________________

14. [WARNING for suicide]

__________________________________________________

15. [WARNING for abuse]

__________________________________________________

Notes:

Sorry for late again, work's a bit busy this week.

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #341.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I think you hit on something there. The difference between your boyfriend and your aunties is that you can break up with your boyfriend and never see him again with little damage. Because like you said, you don't have that family bond. Do you think you could do that with your aunties? Even if they are not blood related, you have that bond. If something happened between you and you never spoke to each other would you feel broken up like you would with your boyfriend or would you feel estranged?

I think that's the difference I feel here. A husband and wife can divorce and go their separate ways, never speaking to each other. And to me, it doesn't have the same feeling as if I became estranged to my sister.

I guess that's why a lot of people see it differently. Even the marriage itself is in a way harder to break up with kids. With kids involved, that person will still be part of your life when your life when you break up. But you're right, you don't really "break up" with a relative in the sense that you can do with a romantic partner.

However, I do still think "family" is one of those concepts that does not mean the same to everyone. For example my bf will only use "family" for his parents and siblings, I'd use "family" even for my grandma's cousins back in the ole home country that I see once a year. And neither of us are wrong. It's perception and culture that define what family really is. Parents + kids is just pretty obvious.

Quick add on, my mother and father have not spoken to each other in 22 years and counting, having a child together does not automatically mean that you are still connected... In that time they have been in the same room once and that was for my confirmation and I don't think they even looked at each other during the 5 or so hours that went on...

True. Also, true with the whole grandma's cousins thing. I have family up and down the East Coast, US and Puerto Rico that I've never met. But I still call them family because that's how I was raised. If they were to show up on my doorstep, I am expected to treat them the same way as I treat the cousins that I am close with. And most of those "cousins" are not even blood related. There are cousins through marriage umpteenth times removed but again, in my family, they are family and should be treated as such.

You've not seen my family history then.

"I think that's the difference I feel here. A husband and wife can divorce and go their separate ways, never speaking to each other. And to me, it doesn't have the same feeling as if I became estranged to my sister."

This makes no sense to me. When you really get down to it, there is no difference between an estranged sister or divorced spouse. It was still a relationship you had that fell apart, ending with the two of you never deliberately seeing each other again. Being blood related doesn't give you some magical connection that means you're bound and fated to be flung within the orbit of each others lives as long as you both exist in this world; or make feelings any more or less hurt than if the cruel words had come from the person you once believed you would love forever.

I think you're proving the issue of use of the word 'family' here. You've automatically given more weight to the sibling relationship (typically called family) than the chosen spouse relationship.

[ SECRET POST #2390 ]

Re: Does a couple without kids count as "a family"?

Re: Does a couple without kids count as "a family"?

Re: Does a couple without kids count as "a family"?

Re: Does a couple without kids count as "a family"?

Re: Does a couple without kids count as "a family"?

Re: Does a couple without kids count as "a family"?