[ SECRET POST #2395 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2395 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


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02.
[The Most Popular Girls in School]


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03.
[Welcome to Night Vale]


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04.
[Gerard Way and Frank Iero]


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05.
[Mastumoto Jun]


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06.
[Macdonald Hall]


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07.
[Downton Abbey]


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08.
[Generator Rex]


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09.
[Neil Oliver]


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10.
[Star Trek]


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11.
[Star Trek: TNG]


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12.
[The Vampire Diaries]













Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 025 secrets from Secret Submission Post #342.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Living vs. Surviving

[(Anonymous)]

I guess I'm kind of concerned about my coping mechanism for living in new situations. Namely, that I sort of shut down and go into survival mode. I don't go out and pursue fun things in my area, I don't go and meet new people.

If I get stressed enough, I pretty much stop eating, and I sleep whenever I'm not working or being in school. It's like I spend so much energy just surviving being in a new living situation that I can't even get enough energy to enjoy myself.

Does anybody have any ides for how I can snap out of this? I want to be able to enjoy myself more, rather than just surviving.

(I should add that I think this is a conditioned response, rather than due to a disorder or imbalance. I spent most of my life in survival mode, so the stress of living in a new place tips me right over the edge from coping to just surviving.)

Re: Living vs. Surviving

[(Anonymous)]

Honestly? The only thing I can think of is to make yourself go out and do fun stuff/see the sights/meet people/etc. It doesn't have to start off as anything major - it can be as simple as grabbing food at a new restaurant that looks good, or seeing a movie but just go out and try to snap yourself out of your routine that way.

Re: Living vs. Surviving

[diet_poison]

Or even just going to do homework at a library or park, or driving a different route home, or talking to someone interesting-looking before/after class if you feel comfortable doing that...baby steps :)

Re: Living vs. Surviving

[(Anonymous)]

is seeing a psychologist or counselor an option? (someone maybe specializing on PTSD?)

Re: Living vs. Surviving

[thene]

You might want to read this article about parentification and the Siege Response form of coping, which sounds somewhat like what you're doing, though the article is specific to Adult Children of Narcissists so probably has nothing the hell to do with the causes of your response.

For me it's entirely about trust and confidence - I have to trust that I'm in a safe place, that I'm in control of my life and the decision to enter a new situation was a positive one and I'm going to enjoy the new situation. Obviously this works better with some new situations than with others. Imo surrounding yourself with good people helps a lot. So does knowing that it's at least 95% likely that the worst things that will ever happen to me already have, I'm still here, and however it goes the new situation is not able to do shit to me. Etc etc.