fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2415 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2415 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Arrested Development]

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04.

[Ray Donovan]

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[30 Rock]

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06.

[Lady Gaga]

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[Gerard Way of My Chemical Romance]

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09.

[ATLA]

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[Mabinogi]

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[The Hobbit]

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[Teen Wolf]

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[Top left: Sora and Riku from Kingdom Hearts
Top right: Sam and Dean from Supernatural
Bottom left: Akanishi Jin and Yamashita Tomohisa
Bottom right: Legolas and Aragorn from Lord of the Rings]

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 049secrets from Secret Submission Post #345.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

12. http://i42.tinypic.com/10zbrsk.jpg
[The Hobbit]

who the fuck would want to imagine that dude doin the dirty?

Your mom.

Never underestimate the power of Rule 34!

Er... why would people make Dori a prostitute? I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if it happened once, but this makes it sound like a common thing.

Most of the dwarves were honestly pretty ugly to me, I can't imagine any non-dwarf wanting to sleep with them (probably why they tried to make the three most important ones slightly more normal looking).

Woah, woah, woah. I am fairly into the Hobbit fandom but I was not aware that this was a thing.

You know, I... I just spent thirty minutes in the Billy Elliot section of The Pit. And I'm relieved I stayed out of the Hobbit fandom.

LMAO!

Me, I'm sick and tired of fics of Aragorn as a PIMP! And Gollum in a split-personality ballet dancer AUs! And don't get me started on Gandalf meets Dumbledore, wizarding BDSM sessions ensue fics. I have had ENOUGH.

Whoa. What part of fandom do you hang out in?

(no subject)

seventh_seal - 2013-08-13 23:33 (UTC) - Expand

I know right? If anyone in the Fellowship is a pimp it's Boromir. And I hate how those fics always make Gandalf the sub, it's so OOC! I'm not even gonna get into the stupid fanon about the way Nazgul make sandwiches. READ THE DAMN BOOKS AND SEE HOW WRONG YOU ARE.

seventh_seal - 2013-08-13 23:49 (UTC) - Expand

wikdsushi - 2013-08-14 00:06 (UTC) - Expand

seventh_seal - 2013-08-14 00:09 (UTC) - Expand

Gollum as Black Swan? X)

I meant to get into the Hobbit fandom, but there weren't that many fics then, and then I forgot I cared about it.

I hate prostitute fics. Or, fics that feature down on their luck characters immediately turning to prostitution.

Okay clearly Hobbit fandom has destroyed my brain because my first reaction was "Wait, I thought NORI was the one who always gets written as a prostitute."

Dwarf porn: Not even once

Eh, my first thought was, "Nah, Dori's more of a pimp. If you want a prostitute, Nori's your man. Now, Ori, ORI'S a courtesan-in-training if I've ever seen one."

And, yes, I would totally read any and all.

I should add that I'm the person who created Voldemort/Pikachu. I very possibly have the strongest constitution in all of fandom.

thene - 2013-08-14 01:37 (UTC) - Expand

Nah, Nori's usually the one who runs the brothel.

I wrote the first one, so mea culpa. But honestly I've only seen three or four others? You have to be looking to find such things.

[Picture is Dori, from the movie "The Hobbit". He is a man with rosy light skin, and light gray hair with tons of elaborately made braids, including his beard. He has a long mustache done in two locks, and thick eyebrows. He has gray eyes, a wide forehead (compared to his face) and a big nose and ears, which have dark earrings. He is wearing dark robes and looking to the side, sort of serious.]

If you like fic like this that's fine. These are just my feelings on this particular subject.

I'm sick and tired of stories about Dori being a prostitute!! I can't for the life of me imagine him as one. Nor can I imagine him being a total horny minx who sleeps around.

You know, that description actually makes the thought of him as a prostitute more bearable XD

transcriptanon - 2013-08-14 17:34 (UTC) - Expand

I cannot stop laughing.

Yeah. I'm very glad now that I never got into that particular fandom.

I remember seeing the Kink Meme prompt for that. It specified that he ends up a high-class prostitute. Kinda like Companions in Firefly.

The problem with stuff like this is that sometimes a particular idea will take off and end up flooding the fandom until you get totally sick to death of it.

Strangely, I haven't seen much of this particular plot, besides the first one I spotted (and never got beyond the first chapter). I see a good few more fics where he's just an outright slut than I do of him being a prostitute.

- Mimi Sardinia (DW won't sign me in on OpenID.)

I have a hard time imagining the dwarves having much of a sex drive period. And I don't think the culture could or wouldsupport full time sex workers. But what do I know:)

What the fuuuuuck, fandom, is this actually a thing? What the fuuuuuuck!!!!

Yeah, Hobbit movie fandom went in a reeeeeally weird direction. :/

-cue Lindir swanning in and singing 'You Don't Have To Be A Prostitute'...