fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2420 ]

[ SECRET POST #2420 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2420 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 064 secrets from Secret Submission Post #346.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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[Picture is a half-duplicated image of a wrapped gift box. The wrapping paper is a metallic silver color, and the wrapping ribbon is a simple purple done in a bow.]

I often write eleventh-hour pinch hits or treats for exchanges. Most aren't masterpieces, but they're generally well-received.

However, if a year goes by and the recipient never makes any comment or acknowledgement, I quietly take their name off the story. Yes, I'm a douche. A gift is a gift, maybe they died, yadda-yadda. That's why this is a secret.

[Picture is the difficulty selection screen of a videogame. It has the options: "Easy", "Medium", and "Hard".]

If it's an option, I always play games on the easy setting. I'm just not that good and I don't find overly difficult challenges in games to be fun. I play games more for the storyline and visuals than the actual gameplay. In fact, I really wish there was a "never die" option for all games.

Secret because: I'd get laughed out of the gamer fandom if I ever admitted this.

[Picture is Cersei Lannister as portrayed by the actress Lena Headey from the TV show "Game Of Thrones". She is a woman with light skin and very long dark blonde hair, a little wavy at the ends. She is wearing an expensive but simple red dress or blouse and a silver pendant. She is looking seriously at something in the distance.]

I think people who consider Cersei to be a feminist character are completely missing the point of her character. Her views towards women are textbook examples of internalized misogyny. She may be a "strong, independent woman" but she's also a horrible person and not someone who people should rally around.

[Picture is the actress Anne Hathaway as Catwoman from the movie "The Dark Night Rises". She is a woman with pale skin, long dark brown hair reaching her chest and wearing a latex-type skin-tight black full-body suit, with a black partial mask covering her eyes. She has bright red lips. She is standing in front of the railway on the outside of a building in a big city at night. She is standing upright and looking serious.]

I want a Catwoman movie before a Wonder Woman one. The first Catwoman adaptation bombed but with the success of The Dark Knight Rises, I think it could be the opportunity for a new movie about the origin of Catwoman, with Hathaway.

And if it's good, it would prove to the studios that a superhero movie with a female lead works.

Edited 2013-08-18 22:13 (UTC)

[Picture is "The Comic Book Guy" from the cartoon "The Simpsons". He is a fat man with yellow skin, short brown hair pulled back in a small low ponytail. He has a light beard and mustache around his mouth, and is saying through a comic book speech bubble "Worst apology ever." He is wearing red pants or shorts and a blue T-shirt with the secret's text on it.]

[On the character's T-shirt] I'm sick of apologizing for my One True Pairing.

Picture not related to fandom. If you don't like it Fuck Off And Die.

[Picture is Sam Winchester, as portrayed by the actor Jared Padalecki, from the TV show "Supernatural. He seems to be reclined on his right side against something, maybe on the floor. He is wearing a light gray, dark gray and blue tartan shirt. He has light olive skin and short brown hair. He is looking sort of upset or hurt about something, with a sad frown of sorts on his face.]

Sam, I freaking love you! Folks don't know, but I've wanted everything that you've wanted. Demon sex (why weren't you doing that sooner with Ruby V. 1???), demon blood to power up, RoboSam 1000 kicking butt, not putting your soul back, taking time away from Dean, taking that year off, dating beautiful lovely women.

You deserve to be happy, too!

[Picture is a drawing of the Blue Spy from the videogame "Team Fortress 2". He is a man with light olive skin and brown eyebrows, wearing a skin-tight dark blue mask covering his whole head, except for his eyes and mouth. He is standing with his back to the viewer and looking cockily over his shoulder, and is smoking a cigarette as he holds a handgun pointing upwards in his right hand. He is wearing a white shirt and a dark blue suit with thin dark vertical stripes. The fanart is credited to a "[check mark or letter "V"?] NANDA [smiling face emoticon]".]

The smell of cigarette smoke used to disgust me. Now it turns me on.

Secret because according to the Internet, smoking is literally the worst.

[Picture is black text over a blank gray background.]

I'm tempted to make one fake secret per batch that really gets underneath people's skin and causes a flood of comments. Mission accomplished once already, now I'm trying to work out my next plan of attack without seeming too obvious a troll.

My reasons for dong this? No one cares but Fandom Secrets used to be so much fun with the discussions and the drama and the delicious, delicious wank. Now it's dwindling into oblivion with every new round, and where is the love, people? Let's shake things up a bit. I want outraged anons linking to secrets going 'How Dare You!!!111', I want lurkers coming in to join for the wank and stay for the real fun and discussions. I want new people discovering fandoms and seeing secrets they can relate to and going 'oh wow gee I thought I was the only person who felt like that'.

Those sorts of secrets though never seem to get the level of responses that the trolls do, so I figure if I want to light a fire I need to strike a match. And it's not like I even want to go back to LiveJournal, I just want things to work better on DreamWidth. Fandom Secrets is like an institution. It cannot be allowed to die.

[Picture is the black silhouette of a phone booth, with the text "50 years" showing through small rectangular holes. It has a pretty neat blue background with sort of concentric circles with a blurry disco ball texture, so it looks a very light blue on the center and very dark blue on the edges.]

I'm really hoping John Hurt's Doctor for the Fiftieth isn't some in-between Doctor 8.5, but the Doctor before he even became The Doctor. I want John Hurt's Doctor to be 'The Other' and I want Moffat to resurrect the Cartmel Master Plan. Apparently this puts me at odds with most of the Who Fandom.

[Picture is the actress Elisabeth Sladen. She is a (in appearance) middle-aged woman with light olive skin, straight dark brown hair reaching a little past her shoulders and some bangs/forelocks. She is wearing a white shirt, a khaki vest or sweater with an orange trim and a brown leather? jacket over that. She appears to be wearing dark pants and a dark purse too.]

Elisabeth Sladen was born a couple of years before my mother, but was ageing a lot better. When I told my mom that the actress who played Sarah Jane had died (Mom always liked the character), she asked how old she had been. I couldn't bring myself to say "Actually, she was a little older than you" because I didn't want my mom to start comparing herself unfavorably. I lied and said "I think she was in her fifties?"-- i.e. closer to the age Sarah Jane seemed to be on New Who/Sarah Jane Adventures than Sladen's actual age.

Sorry Mom. I think you look good even if you don't always agree.

Edited 2013-08-18 22:18 (UTC)

[Picture is the drawing of a set of partially sectioned feminine reproductive organs, like the kind that appears in school textbooks. It has signs pointing to each body part: fallopian tube, uterus, cervical canal, cervix, vagina, ovary.]

I want to strangle whoever convinced so many fanfic writers that cervical penetration is common and pleasurable.

[Picture is the character Rita Repulsa from the TV show "Mighty Morphin Power Rangers". She has light olive skin and is wearing a large brown and silver headdress that has two peaks pointing to the sides. The headdress has a black band near her head, with sort of interlaced curved lines of bright metal on it. She is also wearing a large dress or cape thing with brown and black colors and the same curved metallic lines all over it. There are metallic rings around her neck and seemingly going up into below her headdress. She is extending her arms upwards and to the sides and smiling with her mouth wide open in genuine glee, her face up to the sky. There is a huge piece of rusted metal in front of her.]

I always had a crush on her.

Edited 2013-08-18 22:34 (UTC)

[Picture is black and green text over a stylized letter "Beta" and the word "BETA" as a logo of sorts, in the color red.]

Old secret green text:

Right now, I'm beta-ing an A/B fic that's really bad. Not only is the grammar and the spelling horrid, but the characters are so fanon it hurts. Character A is made to be a woobie wearing leather pants. (Literally.) Character D who sometimes opposes them in canon is made to be a total Out of Character villain. And character B is randomly obsessed with Character A and develops a whole new personality for absolutely no reason. And it's twenty thousand words long. I wish I could send it back to her, but apparently the author never has any luck with a regular beta -- she always hangs around my fandom's beta forums. And that kind of makes me feel guilty.

New secret black text:

This was my secret. Anyway, I finished beta-ing the fic and I set it back to her. She posted it... and she implemented pretty much none of my suggestions. She didn't even fix the grammar and the formatting. It's pretty ridiculous how disappointed I am, but I worked really hard on beta-ing it. My notes were half as long as the entire fic. Recently she asked me to beta another fic for her, and I really want to say something snippy like how this won't be a productive author-beta relationship because she doesn't listen to me.

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[ SECRET POST #2420 ]

Transcripts!

Secret 1 - Fanwork gift exchanges

Secret 2 - Videogames

Secret 3 - Game of Thrones

Secret 4 - Catwoman, Wonder Woman

Secret 5 - Shipping

Secret 6 - Supernatural

Secret 7 - Smoking

Secret 8 - Fandom Secrets

Secret 9 - Doctor Who

Secret 10 - Elisabeth Sladen, New Doctor Who, Sarah Jane Adventures

Secret 11 - Fanfiction writing

Secret 12 - Mighty Morphin Power Rangers

Too Big - Betaing, fanfiction writing