fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2423 ]

[ SECRET POST #2423 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2423 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[Amanda Palmer]

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03.

[Breaking Bad]

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04.

[Free]

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05.

[Urdnot Wrex (Mass Effect)]

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06.

[Star Trek: Deep Space Nine]

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07.

[My Chemical Romance]

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08.

[Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh]

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09.

[Twin Peaks, Audrey Horne and Agent Dale Cooper]

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10.

[Johnny Weir, American figure skater]

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11.

[Star Trek: The Next Generation]

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12.

[Arrested Development]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 026 secrets from Secret Submission Post #346.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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Tell me a story about yourself. Long, short, customer service-y - I don't care either way.

In preschool, when kid’s shoes would come untied. I’d tell them I could tie shows even though I couldn’t, and everyone thought I was their hero, but then I tied their shoes in ten knots and walked away feeling so goddamn proud of myself. Suckers.

I saw something I can't explain when I was five. I was staying in a hotel room when my parents/younger sister. It was late at night, and my mother was in the shower. I woke up and was waiting by the door for her to come out. (I didn't like the dark). Out of nowhere, a sort of man of light appeared out of the back wall where the front of our bed was. It ran over the bed and up out the window that was a foot or two away from the bed.

The memory is still pretty vivid, though memory isn't always the most accurate. I know my mother remembers me screaming about a 'light man' running over my sister's head, and I do remember eagerly telling people about what I saw a few years later. I do not believe in ghosts, or spirits, or magic, I also am an atheist.

One of my aunts saw a similar light phenomenon, though it was not human-shaped. She always explained it as being all lightning, but she was never sure.

Hmm. I don't remember if it was raining out or not that night. The building had an open square in the middle, I suppose so the rooms on the inside would be able to get air, I think. The windows looked out onto other people's rooms. The only explanation I've come up with is that someone might have shown a really strong light into our room somehow. No idea why it was shaped like a man (Though, it was more like the old AOL yellow guy, featureless, only it was made of a light white/blueish and had sort of rainbows running through it)

Could you have fallen back to sleep and been dreaming?

My other thought that goes along with it - and this is creepier, though not so much in a supernatural way - is that it's possible you were still a bit bleary, and someone or something was in your room (an intruder, a cat, etc.) and in your half-awakeness you interpreted it as a light man. :/ The eyes can also do that, they can make you think you saw something you didn't.

Re: So,F!S...

(Anonymous) - 2013-08-22 00:19 (UTC) - Expand

When I was little, maybe 3 or 4, I climbed up this ramp thing. My mother was holding my hand, but I managed to wriggle free and go up higher. Of course I fell; from maybe two meters high. I actually remember the slipping, it's one of my first memories, but I do not remember the fall. Anyway I was passed out for like ten minutes, and my mom later told me she was horrified and though that she'd need to call my dad to tell him I died. I woke up though, but it's been an endless joke, about me being a bit weird in the head because I fell on it.

I had to report to my male boss that something has to be done about the girls toilets as someone keeps 'missing' the bowl and there's shit on the seats. For the second time

This is a professional office, they're not public toilets.

Most awkward health report I've ever had to file because yes, boss, the girls in this office are apparently that disgusting. :/

So it's childhood stories time, I guess.

As a little girl, I'd climb on anything I could reach. I'd always try and walk/sit/balance myself on the armrests of the sofas. If you let me unattended for 2 minutes next to a chest of drawers, I'd pull the drawers open to make a staircase and climb (I was once taken down as I reached the glorious third step, never reached before ó_ò).

My grandpa was looking after me once and didn't watch me for like, 5 minutes or so. Literally a few minutes. When my mom came back and she couldn't see where I was, she immediately went to the most dangerous place in the vecinity: the rooftop with a precarious handrail. There I was! Apparently I had dodged my grandpa (in between the stairs and me) and climbed all the way up. Without him noticing.

Anything I wasn't supposed to climb to, there I was, gripped tightly to it and trying to get higher. Except trees because fuck trees, all dirty and full of bugs (though later in life I learned to appreciate them a bit more). Or the stuff you were actually supposed to climb, like the metal structures at parks. Those things terrified me, for some reason.

Morale: I should've been a fucking ninja but my mom nipped my (slightly suicidal) aspirations. So now I just hang my legs off the staircase and enjoy having nothing under my feet.

I loved climbing trees. My friend and I did this a lot in elementary school. Now I look at them and wonder how I did that without freaking out. :-P

When I was a kid, I had an English friend who always made Doctor Who references. Not having seen DW, I didn't get them.

I was so sad when we reunited and she told me she wasn't a fan anymore. :/ (I guess she doesn't like New Who.) I was like, "but I finally get why you used to scream 'exterminate, exterminate' all the time!"

I saw too many people in my life die.

One time in a doctor's office waiting room this kid was taking his gum out of his mouth and stretching it at me and I told some old lady that I assumed was his grandma and she was probably thinking "wtf am I supposed to do about it this is why I never had kids" but she said "Oh, he's just teasing." I haven't thought about that in a long time but damn that pisses me off, there is no "just" teasing, I was taught that I shouldn't tease people. Don't teach kids that they should just sit back and take it when people are teasing them also I get the feeling this is usually said to girls when they complain about boys for some reason.

Another time in another waiting room I was talking to a girl my age and she said her father didn't speak English and I said "Why, is he stupid?" I'm just throwing that in there in case the above story made you think I was some kind of preschool saint. (I believe he spoke Yiddish, might have been Polish. I remember he was quite dapper looking and the girl had really pretty red hair.)

My mother swears when I was really little I got out of the house one day and wandered into the pasture where I ended up harassing the horse we had at time by hugging his legs why he stood over me until Mom found me. She got me out of there as quickly as possible and said amazingly the horse stayed perfectly still until we were both out of the way, then freaked the fuck out.

I have a similar story about my cousin and a police dog. My uncle (the dog's handler) left them together for a bit one day, and looked up a few minutes later to see that the dog had my cousin's entire arm in his mouth. Uncle tried to stay calm as he assessed the situation, and when he got closer he realized that the dog was also trying to stay calm and not hurt my cousin despite being clearly freaked out. My uncle finally worked out that my cousin had grabbed the dog's tongue while he was sleeping and she had no intention of letting go.

I really liked the taste of chewable vitamins as a kid, especially red ones.

When I was ~4 I was pestering Mom to give me my vitamin for the day, but she was busy. Eventually I just looked at the top of the bottle, read the directions, and opened it myself.

Mom had to rethink the childproofing on the house after that.

One time at work, I was helping an older man and his adult son find socks. The aisle had just been reset and most of the pegs didn't have price labels, so I made several trips to the nearest scanner, as I didn't have access to a handheld at the time. The old man was really slow about picking through the different options and wanted each of his choices checked individually just in case any turned out to be on sale. His son kept quietly apologizing and I could hear them arguing as I left/just before I returned, but it honestly wasn't too bad. It was a slow day in the first place, and the two of them were kind of amusing; their dynamic reminded me a bit of Dorothy and Sofia, or Fred and Lamont.

After a good fifteen minutes or so, the old man had chosen some socks to buy and his son was looking relieved to be getting out of there. I asked if there was anything else they needed help with before I went back to work. The old man started to say no-- then stopped, looked me up and down and said, "Well, actually..."

The son, who had been half out of the aisle by then, whipped his head around so fast that I'm surprised he didn't pull anything. He had this half annoyed, half embarrassed look on his face and stalked back over going, "Daddy..." in a warning tone of voice.

The old man ignored him completely and said, "See, I'm looking for the mother of my child-- make yourself look presentable, boy-- and I think you might be her. Whatcha think?"

At that point, the son had frozen in place and put his face in his hands and was giving me an apologetic look through his fingers. Just to paint this picture in all of its absurdity, the son looked to be in his mid-thirties I was twenty-one and looked more like sixteen.

Anyway, I said to the old man in as close to a genuinely apologetic tone of voice as I could manage on the brink of laughter, "I really don't much like children."

"Oh, you don't?"

"No, sorry."

"Well, gee, that's too bad... You heard the lady, boy-- get lost!"

That's when I finally busted out laughing. The son shouted, "Daddy--!" and then turned to me to apologize again and say that they were fine and thank me for my help. They were still arguing as I went back to work, the son complaining that he couldn't take his father anywhere and the father insisting that his son needed to lighten up "like that nice young lady." Made my night.

Back in January, I took the train up to UCSB to see Cabaret with my friend who still goes there. I stayed the night with her then got another train and went up to Lompoc to see my sister. We were GOING to go to Hearst Castle for my birthday because neither of us has ever been.

Sunday morning we headed out and as we were driving, an alert kept going off that something was wrong with her charging system. We pulled off in Morro Bay and found a service station right away. Unfortunately it was only open Monday-Friday! Someone at a gas station told us to go to AutoZone, but they only sell parts.

We called AAA and were told we'd have to be towed to San Luis Obispo, where there was a mechanic open Sundays. While waiting for the tow truck, we wandered around a grocery store and bought some mini pies (apple and cherry). We got towed and sat around while they replaced her alternator which was completely dead.

We got lunch while they worked on it, and then just went back to Lompoc. :\

I have two scars on my face.

One of them is through my left eyebrow. At the mall in my hometown, there are these huge pillars with mirrors on them, square shaped, so there are edges. When I was about three I was so damn excited about getting cookies when we got home that I ran straight into the edge of one, slicing my forehead pretty badly. My mom tells me when I came to I was still woozily asking about the cookies. The scar used to be really obvious for years and years but eventually it wasn't there anymore, now there's just kind of a gap in my eyebrow, which you can only really see if you look for it.

The other one is through my right eyelid. My memory of this one is really fuzzy and I don't have anybody else to go on as to how it happened, either. I just know it was my first year of middle school, and somehow I ran into the front end of a metal pipe with my face and cut my eyelid open. I can't explain HOW it happened because there's no explanation that makes sense, and I don't know what was done about it, even though that MUST have been a big deal but I have ZERO memory of being in the hospital or getting stitches or an eyepatch or anything, I just know that there's a scar on my eyelid (really more like a "bump" in the eyelid) from it and that pooping made my eye feel like it was going to explode for about a month or more.

I've also run into more than a few closed doors in my life so maybe I just need to pay more attention to where I'm running.

One day at summer cap when I was around eight years old, we were playing a game where we had to crawl through masking tape that was taped up in webs all the way down the hall (the conceit was that they were lasers and if we touched one, an alarm would go off...I actually believed it). After we got through the "lasers", we had to beat the bad guy by rolling a higher number on a 100-sided die. I got to roll the die for everyone. ...I got a 100. There went my life's supply of luck. :P

When I was like 3 or 4, I ate one of those silica packets that come in shoes--you know, the ones that are emblazoned with DO NOT EAT--because it looked like salt and I love salt. But it tasted funny so I went to my mom to ask what it was and she, wanting to prevent her daughter from eating poisonous stuff, said "Don't eat that, you'll die!"

But of course I couldn't tell her I ate it because I would be in trouble. I was already doomed. So for about a half-hour I wandered morosely around the house bidding this cruel world goodbye. Then I forgot about my certain death and went to watch Barney on tv.

~*~*~THE END~*~*~

While I was in day care at something like 6-9 months old, I apparently cornered a slightly older boy and kissed him.

Also, while not directly related, because the ladies running the day care didn't speak much English, I actually ended up starting to learn Spanish before I learned English [though I stopped using once we moved [I wasn't very old] and forgot most of it. But hey! It can make for an easy way to confuse people since, technically, Spanish was my first language.

I suddenly realized the other day that I gave all of my stuffed animals at my grandma's house really literal names, and I find that funny.

There's Baby Grandma (a babydoll who lives at Grandma's house), Fat Clown (a clown who is fat), Joe Bear (a bear in swimming trunks), Santa Bear, and Tony. Tony is a ragdoll from a craft fair at a church we went to when I was a kid--it was called Atonement Lutheran, but I was only about three when I got her, so I couldn't say "Atonement" correctly. So I called her "Tony."

I never gave my toys at home such literal names. They all had weirdly elegant names like "Charisma" and stuff.

I had a stuffed turtle named Makeup.

I apparently hated one of my aunts when I was a small child, and when she was babysitting me I'd do whatever I could to escape her or try to get her to leave. (We don't get along great now, but we can at least hold pleasant conversations sometimes.) When I was about three years old the whole family went to Disneyland and she had me on one of those Velcro wrist leashes. As soon as she wasn't looking for a second I pulled it off and strapped it to a guardrail and was halfway down Main Street before she noticed.

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