6. I've never found this sort of argument to be fair. I obviously don't know the details of your specific situation, but when people say that someone can't write about something because they haven't experienced it themselves, that's BS. Virgins can write porn, and some can write it well. I'm guessing most fanfic writers haven't ever been in a war, but they can still write about it. It's what makes a good writer - making it believable even if you don't have personal experience to base it off of. Sometimes it might take research, sometimes it's just having a good enough imagination. Maybe the fic in particular you're referring to is crappy - I wouldn't know. But just because it wasn't written exactly in the way that you imagine it should have been doesn't mean it was inaccurate. I really doubt wanting to kill yourself is the same experience for everyone.

I know I'm not dealing with your main point, which I think is that the person went ahead and wrote about the subject when you had just recently lived it, but I just needed to rant, since the argument itself is something of a pet peeve for me.