fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2458 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2458 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[Aneurin Barnard playing Richard III in The White Queen]

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03.

[Leverage]

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04.

[Pokemon]

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05.

[Discworld]

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06.

[legend of korra]

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07.

[The Young Protectors]

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08.

[Animal Crossing]

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09.

[Men in Black]

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10.

[The Rivers of London]

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11.

[Teen Wolf]

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12.

[Welcome to Night Vale]

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 026 secrets from Secret Submission Post #351.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

OK SO I'LL TRY TO MAKE THIS SHORT. I've got a Best Bro, he's been my best friend since fucking 2001. He finished Law School with honors and he only has left to complete his thesis and give the Final Oral Grad Exam of evilness to be a Legit Lawyer.

He also has written lots of papers and contributed to University and Law Magazines with articles. He's presenting a new one in Valparaíso tomorrow morning (120 kms from Santiago, where we live) and wants me to come.

The thing is, I can't come. I work freelance, yes, but Wed-Tues-Fri are work days for me, SPECIALLY in the morning. (I cook and sell meals for the uni kids at the Music College of Univrsidad de Chile near my house. That means everything needs to be ready at 12:00.)

HE'S SO DISAPPOINTED. And... and he's right to be disappointed. Every time he has a presentation with a new paper or contribution or has to give a speech or whatever... there's always something preventing me to go. My scheudle is really tricky - has a lot of windows, but the lenght of those windows of time prevent me of doing anything that's not work or therapy because there's just not enought time and commute times are LONG.

I want to support him and be there for him, but I really can't (this time, at least), and he knows it, he knows how my scheudles are, and he's still so... disappointed. And he's the greatest guy ever, always there for me, and I know he resents I can't do the same for him. He was a mix of angry and sad when we said goodbye and hanged the phone.

IDK, guys. I just... I feel like a really shitty friend right now and don't know how to fix it.

Tell him you're really sorry, and can he give you some dates waaaaaay in advance so you can put them on your calendar in stone? Make the next few things? Take tomorrow off from work, if possible?

wow, sorry to hear about that. it's a difficult situation on both sides. maybe what you could do is organize a small party/dinner with close friends (or just you two, if that's better) and, like, celebrate his achievements and all his hard work. so even if you can't make it to the actual event, he can still feel that he has your support and that you care and want to be involved.

IDK if this is only something girls would appreciate, but send him a card with a nice, heartfelt note and, if you can afford it, a small gift.

Aw no! :( I mean, no doubt this sounds like a big fucking deal, but you have commitments too and... does he have any idea how bad you feel? Because I feel bad for you feeling bad. Is there any way you can make it up to him? Like, a celebratory dinner or something less lame?

Make sure you do something to celebrate with him as soon as you get the chance. Take him out to dinner and give him a really spiffy briefcase or something like that. But put some priority time into making a big deal out of him.

My $0.02.

I don't think he's right to be disappointed. And he's certainly not right to be angry with you. You have obligations and he knows it! It's not cool to be angry that you won't just toss that aside to go out of town and do a thing with him. It's not like you're just making up excuses to not come to his things, so don't feel bad.

he's probably just feeling disappointed because he cares about you and was hoping you'd be able to make it. i'm sure he understands if you have a busy schedule. when things like this happen with me i try to do something else to make up for it, like a nice congrats present or going out for drinks later or something when you have the time. try not to feel too bad about it, because then you'll just both be upset and that doesn't fix nothin.

At least you have good reasons

my BFF hasn't come to various milestones in my life cause she hasn't "felt like it". Have to agree with other friends, she may be my BFF but she's a shit friend.

I invite other friends to this kinda shit now

I've been in your friend's position. (Minus the angry.) One of my BFFs is busy like you, so I know not to take it personally when she can't make it to something -- we just make sure to schedule something for later, when she does have the time and energy for it.

Like others said, definitely invite him to do something nice when time allows it, so he knows it's just your schedule blocking you and not you ditching him every time or something.

And like someone above suggested, give him a nice card to congratulate him for his achievements. A nice thematic present too, I'd think, so he knows you're proud of his work. :)

[ SECRET POST #2458 ]

I don't want to be a shitty friend :(((

Re: I don't want to be a shitty friend :(((

Re: I don't want to be a shitty friend :(((

Re: I don't want to be a shitty friend :(((

Re: I don't want to be a shitty friend :(((

Re: I don't want to be a shitty friend :(((

Re: I don't want to be a shitty friend :(((

Re: I don't want to be a shitty friend :(((

Re: I don't want to be a shitty friend :(((

Re: I don't want to be a shitty friend :(((